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Post by soufflé on Apr 27, 2013 9:57:16 GMT -5
Bandit these are all amazing.
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Post by Tryina Denouement on Apr 27, 2013 10:09:27 GMT -5
Wow, you do love writing poems, don't you?
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Post by bandit on Apr 27, 2013 10:54:18 GMT -5
I hate it, my doctor just told me this was a good distraction from my ex-wife.
Poor Anteater Bemoans His Situation “Alas!” the anxious anteater uttered, “I thought I might eat ants tonight, But I’ve lost my stick of butter! And how, I ask, am I up for the task Of making my insect refection If creamy butter from an old cow’s udder Is missing from the confection?”
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Post by bandit on Dec 18, 2013 13:42:13 GMT -5
Hey, it's been a while! I tried to write an abecedarian poem-- now, I know some of these rhymes sound kind of half-baked, but they are all fit to go along with illustrations that I've prepared and that make the couplets a lot cuter and funnier. 'Cause, you know, it's a picture book!
26 Little Campers Once upon a time On a brisk, spooky night Twenty-six campers Were in for a fright
They set out in the woods And made a little fire Then settled down in tents And prepared to retire
But little did they know That lurking in the bushes Was a dangerous killer Who wanted their tushes
So take a look at these profiles And make sure you look close Which one doesn't belong? Who will give up the ghost?
A was for Albert, who needed a shower B was for Bobbert, who looked like a flower
C was for Cuthbert, who liked to eat noodles D was for Dagobert, who had a little poodle
E was for Egbert, who wore a frilly blouse F was for Filbert, who lived in a house
G was for Gilbert, who was thin as a rail H was for Hubert, who was chubby but frail
I was for Ingbert, who led the scout troop J was for Jobert, who cleaned up Dagobert's poop
K was for Kubert, who had lots of medals L was for Lebert, who brought along a kettle
M was for Matthias, who wasn't a camper N was for Norbert, who was awfully pampered
O was for Osbert, who had a huge nose P was for Probert, who lost all his clothes
Q was for Q*bert, who cried all the time R was for Robert, who swallowed a dime
S was for Sebert, who sneaked along some beer T was for Tolbert, was shaped like a sphere
U was for Ubert, who was blind as a bat V was for Vilbert, who was incredibly fat
W was for Wilbert, who carried a stick X was for Xebert, who always felt sick
Y was for Yobert, who missed his young daughter Z was for Zebert, who was last to be slaughtered.
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Post by Hermes on Dec 18, 2013 15:56:13 GMT -5
Excellent! I think I know who is the odd one out, but I won't spoil it for others.
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Post by Kit's tits kick ticks on Dec 18, 2013 16:41:50 GMT -5
This is awesome But P should be for Pubert.
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Post by Teleram on Dec 18, 2013 18:21:21 GMT -5
Lovin' these poems. Reminds me of Lewis Caroll
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Post by Poe's Coats Host Toast on Dec 19, 2013 1:04:08 GMT -5
Delightful poem, bandit! Is it Matthias who's the odd one out? and lol at you mentioning "your ex-wife" earlier in the thread. I remember getting the image of you being middle-aged when I read that.
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Post by Charlie on Dec 19, 2013 4:46:26 GMT -5
Hey, it's been a while! I tried to write an abecedarian poem-- now, I know some of these rhymes sound kind of half-baked, but they are all fit to go along with illustrations that I've prepared and that make the couplets a lot cuter and funnier. 'Cause, you know, it's a picture book! I actually really like this one! Also, go past me for being as grossed out by your spelling/ vulgarity as current me is!
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Post by bandit on Dec 19, 2013 12:22:28 GMT -5
Is it Matthias who's the odd one out? Good job!
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Post by Teleram on Feb 14, 2014 23:35:54 GMT -5
The Cruel Sinus What is your reason, I do not know And you often interrupt plans that are mine You spread your dirt throughout the day Although I do not want grumble ... You cover Goo my whole figure And I get nothing but a pile of dirt Paper handkerchiefs travel with me in case A moment passes and I have exhausted all I can barely talk without many constraints There is nothing to do but stain the sleeve of my shirt I look like a person who snorted some red paint I wonder when this disease will go As time goes on, my anger rises I hate this terrible runny nose.
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Post by Teleram on Feb 15, 2014 1:15:02 GMT -5
Do you actually have a cold/fever/whatever or is it just a poem?
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Post by Poe's Coats Host Toast on Feb 15, 2014 12:03:53 GMT -5
I like the contrast of the romantic language to the actual content
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Post by Hermes on Mar 27, 2014 13:07:24 GMT -5
Very sad! Is it inspired by real life?
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Post by penne on Mar 27, 2014 19:23:39 GMT -5
I really like this. I love stories about crushed dreams, they're usually heartbreaking in a great way. And so is this.
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