|
Post by Cafe SalMONAlla on Feb 26, 2015 2:34:06 GMT -5
I like the texturing.
|
|
|
Post by Poe's Coats Host Toast on Feb 26, 2015 23:10:39 GMT -5
So this might be too late, and I wanted to come up with more (and maybe better) sentences, but I've only got this one. I thought maybe the more different members contribute the bigger the fanbase looks, but if all the other sentences are better it's fine if you don't include it; here it is:
"The tinkling music coming from the gramophone seemed to put me in a sentimental mood." [this is in reference to Duke Ellington's jazz song 'In a Sentimental Mood'.]
|
|
|
Post by Dante on Feb 27, 2015 6:13:11 GMT -5
You're just in time, Terry Craig; with only one day to go - apologies for not updating the subject line more often, but I was unavoidably detained for a couple of days - I'm now closing sentence submissions. But if you have an illustration, please post it, and soon! This has to be sent off tomorrow.
I have written the accompanying letter, and later on I will be presenting a proposed final draft of all sentences in their closing order. We're presently just narrowing down the final selection and getting started on ordering.
|
|
|
Post by gliquey on Feb 27, 2015 11:24:24 GMT -5
"The tinkling music coming from the gramophone seemed to put me in a sentimental mood." [this is in reference to Duke Ellington's jazz song 'In a Sentimental Mood'.] I like it. I wanted to write something about the gramophone music but didn't know what to say - I'm glad somebody else has used it for a sentence.
|
|
|
Post by Dante on Feb 27, 2015 17:34:07 GMT -5
So, here we are, on the eve of Mr. Handler's birthday. Here is my provisional accompanying letter and list of Snickety Sentences; some sentences have been edited for grammatical consistency, but I hope there are no changes anyone can object to. Everyone who submitted a sentence has at least one included, and many of the cuts were of mine, so I think I've been fair. I'll add in the formatting and illustrations for tomorrow; looks like we'll only have three pictures in the end, unless anyone working on an illustration can hurry it up to be done by tomorrow, but they can be fairly evenly spread-out and I think their minimalism works with the whole project. Anyway, enough rambling; tell me your thoughts on this by tomorrow, and I hope to be able to send this off in timely fashion.
-~<
Dear Sir,
Congratulations on your fortunate event! To specify, at the cost of this no longer potentially serving as a multi-purpose congratulatory letter for the man with a respectable number of fortunate events in his life, congratulations on your birthday. We hope that your blessings, like candles on the birthday cake of anyone older than thirteen, are more than enough to meet your needs.
Like school reunions, public holidays, and highly-anticipated sequels, birthdays are a time of reflection on what has come before and anticipation of what is yet to occur. Reflecting on what came before this sentence, it occurred to us that we could show our respect for your achievements by looking forward to their highly-anticipated sequel, to be published in the forthcoming months. How better to show our attention and commitment as fans and readers than to anticipate your own upcoming work in a work of non-disturbing fanfiction – to compile our ideas, theories and hopes in a collaborative, fan-produced fourth volume of four? What could possibly go wrong?
As it transpired, writing a book was harder than we thought, especially with over thirteen different authors. Instead of thirteen chapters, what we were left with by the deadline was some significant number of sentences, where the right plot was wholly lost and gone. If the secret of all the wrong questions lies in all the wrong sentences, it is as lost to us as if we had written in invisible ink. Perhaps you can make sense of it all, the complete mystery. Our breath is held.
With all due respect,
Anka Anwhistle, Antenora, Brunch, Dante, fragile things, gliquey, Hermes, Lemona Snicket, Marinus, Mister M, Pen, Sherry Ann, Sophie Baudelaire, Willis,
and all the members of 667 Dark Avenue
#o#
1. For Beatrice – no wait, wrong series. [gliquey] 2. There was a town, and there was a girl, and there was a statue, and there was a librarian, and there was a theft, and there was a person who had been kidnapped, and there was a fire, and I’m pretty sure there was a kitchen sink in there as well. [Dante] 3. I should have asked the question, “Shouldn’t you have seen her last in school at this hour?” [gliquey] 4. Like all good stories, there is a hero. I have no idea where she is. [Marinus] 5. “No wonder she ran away so quickly,” he constantly said, and yet he did wonder. [Pen] 6. Having almost run out of suitable tips for Pip and Squeak, I recommended a book about three orphans who suffer constant misfortune, become victims of evil ploys and occasionally make pasta. [gliquey] 7. A lighthouse without an ocean is like high-cocoa chocolate: Dark, dry, and not very popular. [Dante] 8. While family and friends gathered, teary-eyed, to comment on his “untimely demise,” I shivered at the thought that any death would be considered “timely.” [Pen] [illustrated] 9. Everyone there looked slightly sinister; they came across an old lady with beautiful long grey hair, and wide eyes like she had just lost an argument with herself. [Pen] 10. “Who would have tea at this hour?” [Dante] 11. When I had said to Qwerty “the world is quiet here,” I certainly hadn't expected the reply, “it's actually quite loud aboard this train”. [gliquey] 12. “I am currently in the middle of reading a book you might enjoy—it’s called How to Prevent Delayed Ignitions after Triggering a Gun,” Qwerty told me. [gliquey] 13. “I thought of a book a former fencing partner had made me read, about a kid who had an unusual name because he was named by dead people, and this, in turn, made me think of the book it was based on, about a kid who had an unusual name because he was named by animals.” [fragile things] 14. I thought dragons only showed up in tedious stories that begin with “Once upon a time...”, but this story begins with “There was a town…” [Antenora] 15. “Look, I won't make you any promises,” he promised. [Pen] 16. “Go on,” she said with an authoritative tone, which meant “Proceed with caution.” [Pen] 17. A friend with a temper is like a nail sticking out of the floor: You have to tread very carefully around them, or else. [Dante] 18. “The name of Killdeer Fields has nothing to do with killing deer; it's named after a bird-- and I'm pretty sure the bird doesn't kill any deer either.” [Dante & Antenora] 19. I thought of a book my sister had meant to read, in which the heroine receives a warning from her friend, who makes her walk barefoot in the snow. [Lemona Snicket] 20. I had worked out the motive and the method, but I had no possible way of explaining how he had the measles. [Mister M] [illustrated] 21. And I do not understand why the Stain'd Playhouse once allowed the audience to bring live newts into the theatre, but only on Monday nights, or how the effects in The Man Who Looked Somewhat Like Winston Churchill managed to fail every show. [Lemona Snicket] 22. “When did you three work last?” [Dante] 23. “Middle-aged” is a word which here means “a person who has lived through sixty percent of their life, but convinces themselves they're only at fifty percent.” [Sherry Ann] 24. “Old Hal Hairdryer caught Stew stealing from his emporium a couple of years back; he's half-blind, but Stew didn't reckon on the other half.” [Dante] 25. Calling someone a “ray of sunshine” is usually intended as a compliment; however, an acquaintance of mine was once so blinded and agitated by the sun that he shot a man five times in the chest, and consequently I am now hesitant to comment on the radiant qualities of even the kindest strangers. [Sophie] 26. “I remember the last book I read, years ago, about someone else who learned something and there was a bit of a fuss - what a waste of time!” [Dante] 27. There's a German book with a difficult title ending in “Peter” about children like Stew... who get what they deserve. [Dante & Antenora] 28. I had originally thought the bell ringing might signal Sebald code, and spent hours wondering what “it less gangbusters” could possibly mean. [gliquey] 29. “Shouldn't you be uncool?” [Antenora] 30. I didn't say anything, because I remembered a similar conversation with my sister, and I didn't want any of us to end up in a similar situation as her. [Anka] 31. My chaperone thought that guessing her first name would be a challenge, a word which here means “an activity one cannot see the point of.” [Hermes] 32. That may be so, I thought grimly, but she's no longer in Stain'd-by-the-Sea. [Lemona Snicket] 33. I should have asked the question, “If there’s nothing out there, why did I distinctly hear Theodora stomping around in boots?” [gliquey] 34. “It'll be like shooting fish in a barrel,” she said, a phrase which here means “like taking candy from a baby” (which here means “with unfair and vile advantage”). [Pen] 35. Taking off my shoes to avoid making any sounds, I was reminded of a book which had recently been recommended to me in a letter, in which a young boy attempts to escape a library by reading large, dull books and eating pastries, but unlike the young boy in that story, I was unlikely to be magically saved by my pet starling. [fragile things] 36. The tinkling music coming from the gramophone seemed to put me in a sentimental mood. [Terry Craig] 37. I expected her to tell me it was the wrong question, but she merely shrugged and said “don't even ask”. [Lemona Snicket] 38. “It's time for me to tell you my greatest secret, Mr. Snicket; the truth is... my eyes aren't really green, I'm just wearing contact lenses.” [Dante] 39. Victory is like a sugar bowl: It only tastes sweet to the person who gets there first. [Dante] 40. “Is this a rhetorical question?” I asked Hangfire. [gliquey] 41. He was versatile, translucent, dangerous, like poisonous fog seeping up from the underworld through earthly cracks. [Sherry Ann] 42. In his dying breath, Hangfire choked out his final words: “Lemony… I am your father.” [Brunch] 43. “All we have left is applesauce.” [Willis] [illustrated] 44. “Why would you ask all these questions?” [fragile things] 45. It was my birthday, and for now, at least, I was all right. [Dante]
-~< #o#
|
|
|
Post by Cafe SalMONAlla on Feb 28, 2015 2:43:40 GMT -5
Hell yeah! Solid job as always, Dante.
|
|
|
Post by Dante on Feb 28, 2015 3:40:02 GMT -5
I'll take that as a solid assent from everyone else, but since I'll be delivering the work as a link to a thread on 667, then if there are any last-minute changes to be made then we might be able to edit them in before Mr. Handler sees them. Of note is the fact that I missed Terry Craig's name off the draft letter, but I've put it in the real thing since; I've also added the names of a few people who contributed to the thread but couldn't contribute to the project directly, and tweaked a few other small things that needed editing. If there's absolutely anything I've missed - please tell me! I don't think I have, though. You can see the project as Mr. Handler will see it here: Daniel Handler's Birthday 2015Edit: Oh yeah, and suddenly, we're done. So I must thank everyone who came forward and contributed! I'm aware we didn't have quite so much time as usual, but I think a lot of us have been a lot busier lately. I hope you've all enjoyed being a part of this, and enjoy the finished result, too.
|
|
|
Post by Isadora Is a Door on Feb 28, 2015 3:56:13 GMT -5
pen's are the best
|
|
|
Post by gliquey on Feb 28, 2015 4:10:01 GMT -5
It's just a minor thing, and probably doesn't bother anyone else, but under the illustrations where it says "-Sherry Ann", this might be confusing given the illustrations credit a different author (the one who wrote the sentence). Would changing it to "-illustration by Sherry Ann" or something be better?
|
|
|
Post by B. on Feb 28, 2015 5:08:58 GMT -5
You put me as Brunch all the way through, didn't you, FFWF?
|
|
|
Post by Dante on Feb 28, 2015 6:34:15 GMT -5
It's just a minor thing, and probably doesn't bother anyone else, but under the illustrations where it says "- Sherry Ann", this might be confusing given the illustrations credit a different author (the one who wrote the sentence). Would changing it to "-illustration by Sherry Ann" or something be better? Given that the illustrations are clearly in the same style, I think the message will be clear enough after two. The sentence is suffixed with the author of the sentence, and the big illustration is suffixed with the "author" of the illustration - that made sense to me. You put me as Brunch all the way through, didn't you, FFWF? It's more a matter of longest-lasting, most recognisable names, of which there are a couple of other examples in the credits. I think of it as a first-name basis, whereas I get the impression that Trouble is your middle name.
|
|
|
Post by bandit on Feb 28, 2015 14:54:51 GMT -5
I'm glad that I can still get into the sender's list without putting in a finger of work this year.
|
|
|
Post by Dante on Feb 28, 2015 17:13:49 GMT -5
It's the thought that counts.
|
|
|
Post by gliquey on Mar 2, 2015 15:11:53 GMT -5
On Facebook, Lemony Snicket's All the Wrong Questions has posted a link to our birthday thread ( here). It has the caption: "In honor of a certain someone’s birthday, the members of 667 Dark Avenue, wrote 45 sentences we might expect to read in the upcoming conclusion to Lemony Snicket's All the Wrong Questions."
|
|
|
Post by Hermes on Mar 2, 2015 15:42:52 GMT -5
Ho! I wonder if we'll get a reply this year. Or is a link on Facebook considered sufficient?
|
|