|
Post by Spiderman on Oct 5, 2003 8:36:42 GMT -5
I'll just start a thread of Striving to Comprehend (my band's ) songs. Tell me what you think, I guess...
Here I'll post one now.
Linoleum
verse one: I'm a slave to my own discipline Every once and a while it decides to run away Lying helpless on linoleum My mind begins to stray...
chorus: And I break What you make Once again Seems as if I'm a slave (Yeah) I'm a slave to them. (Repeat)
verse two: I try to turn away But the same scenario plays The sky cannot hold my pain But it does what I said...
verse three: Stares in my direction Overpowering at first But I've been in my own detention Ever since my birth...
|
|
|
Post by ponygirl's vapor on Oct 5, 2003 13:50:21 GMT -5
thats very good... mp3?? for us?
|
|
|
Post by Spiderman on Oct 5, 2003 15:19:20 GMT -5
Hah, I would, but we don't have anything recorded yet... but we're a punk rock band, basically. I'll try to get something recorded sometime... anyway... here's another...
Rewards verse: It's funny how, We sometimes find our way, And suddenly, There's both a night and a day, The pessimist, Gets a twinkle in his eye, And now everything's worth a try, The earth, Seems to spin once again, And the racist, Sees the beauty of all men, All the children, Can play where they please, And the crippled, Get up off their knees, Storeowners, Share all they've got, With poor ones, Who don't have a lot, The blessings, Continue overflowing, And we, We find pleasure in our knowing, That peace, Has come once more, When our world, Had tumbled to the floor...
chorus: It can happen with you, And me, And us, It can happen with you, And me, And us, It can happen with God. It can happen with you, And me, And us, For now...
|
|
|
Post by Indistinguishable Blob on Oct 5, 2003 21:23:42 GMT -5
*eyes light up* Oh! I love these! I do hope you get some MP3 type things up soon...that would be so cool...
|
|
|
Post by Indistinguishable Blob on Oct 5, 2003 21:49:39 GMT -5
I know, aren't they cool?
I especially loved the first verse of the first song...not really for any reason other than it was really cool and reminded me of the B-52's ("My mind's been going places with out me lately..."), though of course it's not really relevant to anything.
|
|
|
Post by Spiderman on Oct 9, 2003 16:23:23 GMT -5
I'm liking the positive reaction here I personally really like the next one, though it's kind of sad when you know what's going on with it... I think the chorus is pretty strong. Behind Closed Doors Verse 1: Ten after midnight I look at the sky And the one thing I wonder ...Is why You know that you called me I know that you tried But my heart's still empty With you by my side... Chorus: And I live in a far off land Better with false reality than with a knife in hand... Verse 2: Savior please help me Oh so many prayers Thousands of sleepless nights Girls who want you theirs Why do I bother Except for your heart Do I even care anymore Like I did at our start... Verse 3: I guess I'll keep praying For my well-being and yours But there are more important things Behind closed doors Keeping my anger down Longing for a pause I get whatever I deserve Even if it's a loss...
|
|
|
Post by Indistinguishable Blob on Oct 9, 2003 16:37:25 GMT -5
Ooohhhness. I like. A lot. And I agree, the chorus is absolultley (I can't spell today.) stunning. That last line of it...that is, the second line...whatever, anyway...wow. It IS quite powerful. And depressing. But powerful.
|
|
|
Post by Spiderman on Oct 9, 2003 17:06:27 GMT -5
Thanks. Beware- this is a very sad and dark song... Just Once MoreChorus: Lift me from the blue, Leave what’s left undone, Put me face-down in the sun, To blind me from what’s true… Help me turn from right, Free me from my mind, To the peace I want to find, Lose me in the fight… And as I hit the floor, Would you break me just once more? Verse one: You sit there Helpless Closed eyes Blade at wrist You fit nowhere Hopeless Finding no lies No temptation to exist. And I know I see Your wrist cry It strikes once more. And I’ll go Away from me As you die Holding your cure… Verse two: And I try To come forth As you Lose life right before me. And I cry You don’t know what you’re worth. I knew Our love is something you can’t see… I see your face I collapse on my knees Is it real? Can’t I escape reality? Leave this place! Can’t you hear my pleas? Can’t you heal? Won’t you try and listen to me? Verse three: And I’d Give up Living For you to feel again. Confide Don’t erupt I’m giving you things back from then… I die As you do… I feel What you feel and more And I See what you drew I kneel Your pain is more painful than before… Bridge: And I call! But you’re far gone… And I fall! It all feels too wrong… And I sink to my knees and I scream! As the blood hits the floor in a stream. Trace the flood back to the cut, Your face, so pale, your eyes, tightly shut. Coda: You’re breaking just once more… I make you just once more… Can I tell you just once more?
|
|
|
Post by Indistinguishable Blob on Oct 9, 2003 17:33:57 GMT -5
Again, nothing but praise...
"Free me from my mind, To the peace I want to find, Lose me in the fight…"
I love that so much. It just...yay.
Yes, a very sad and dark song, just like I like them. Sadly, I really haven't anything slightly intelligent to say other than "Wow."
I can't wait to read more.
|
|
|
Post by Spiderman on Oct 9, 2003 17:52:59 GMT -5
Yeah, I always like dark songs too. By the way, that song was just about how you can't stand watching someone inflict so much pain on their body anymore, and you just want to escape yourself and everything around you.
I'll post another soon.
|
|
|
Post by Spiderman on Oct 11, 2003 7:56:28 GMT -5
No temptation to exist... no temptation to live anymore. It's like... you're finding nothing that anyone has said that makes you want to stay alive, which doesn't give you any temptation to exist.
Finding no lies, no temptation to exist...
Anyway, on to a more cheery-like song. It's sort of a love song (hey, every band needs some) and yeah, obviously Jinxy had quite a time trying to come up with a title because it's called...
Love Song Verse 1: Sometimes When the sun is right And I'm waiting For the day or night I call out your name In my agony And suddenly somehow It sets me free
Chorus: The sound of overflowing life In one word takes away my strife I love you and I always will But for now, I have to keep my emotions still So still So still
Verse 2: Waiting For analogies Keeps me guessing Far past when I please I need a sign Something I can touch There's gotta be something This is getting too much
Verse 3: Living Is not quite okay Without you near me You're so far away I hoplessly sigh But in my mind I can't help from feeling You all the time
Coda: Still So Still So Still So Still
This is definitely our best song with music... everybody seems to like it... heh.
|
|