On this page, you'll read the lyrics of the songs recorded on the audiotapes of books 1-11. Written and recorded by the Gothic Archies, these songs often have a theme related to their respective audiobooks.
I have put a LOT of hard work into writting these down, and I will NOT accept anyone using these on their own sites without permission, or taking credit for my work.
If you want to use these lyrics for any purpose, please contact me and ASK for permission. Just ask. I'll usually let you use them.
And don't think you can sneak away with these lyrics without my noticing. I've embedded tiny mistakes in the lyrics on purpose, so I'll be able to easily identify whether you stole it or not.
If and when I find you, thief, I will publically humiliate you, ban you, and never let you forget it. I will turn you into scum of the Lemony Snicket e-community.
Deal? Okay, enjoy the lyrics. These songs are cool.
Two women with powdered white faces, and one long-nosed bald man with warts. Things worsen and worsen, there's a hook-handed person, and others with nastier parts.
This evil and unpleasant crew, completes Count Olaf's acting troupe. The goal of Count Olaf is getting control of the fortune of urchins and orphans alike. I mean horrors, Count Olaf is no laughing matter, when you see Count Olaf, count to zero, then scream and run away, scream, scream, scream and run away.
I have known little civility, sir. Few have been kind, fewer truthful. And though within my ability, sir, I remain dutifully youthful.
I go gray, then bald, with chagrin, when you play the violin. How I pray for death to begin, when you play the violin. True, there’s been trouble and trickery, sir, trembling and tribulations. Twitches from switches of hickory, sir, you sir and your usurpation.
But my patience wears very thin, when you play the violin. How I stay I can’t imagine, when you play the violin.
I’ve endured struggling and thuggery, sir. Physical Ed and psychosis. Sculleries, skulls, and skullduggeries, sir, Haplessness, hype and hypnosis.
But oy vay! the horrible din, when you play the violin. You betray an ear made of tin, when you play, when you slay the violin…