Chapter One
After a long road journey, it is often nice to pull over for a stop and stretch, a word which here means 'to get one's muscles to react after several hours of atrophying'. One can also pull over to enjoy the scenery, stop for a quick potty break, or if there's a roadside restaurant, a quick bite. On the road to the town of Ophelia, there were a few nice places one would and could pull over and take a break at, but the place where the Violet, Klaus, Sunny and Beatrice Baudelaire had just stopped at was
not one of these places. A dark, enormous building laid across enormous walls topped with crosswire and an electric fence. The gates which separated Addams Asylum from the outside world were enormous, black, heavy, and topped with an enormous sign of the asylum's name, and under it, it's motto.
'Ira furor brevis est.' Klaus enunciated, examining the grim dark metallic words. A chill ran down his spine, and it was not just because of the Asylum's ominous atmosphere and the cold weather. 'What does it mean?' Sunny Baudelaire, the second youngest Baudelaire, asked her brother. Klaus swallowed down, aprehensively. 'It means...Anger is a brief insanity.' Above, the dark clouds masked the day with dark, and it looked like rain.
The Baudelaires would need shelter, and if I may say so, dear reader, even in the worst storm, this is my advice.
Never take shelter in an Asylum, specially Addams Asylum. You are better off outside in the forest, with the cold, the wind, the trees which seem to whisper and the bears that live in the woods, than inside of that place.
'Look.' Violet said. She had been examining he exterior of the Asylum, and noticed the ambulance they knew was used by the Sanity Squad, a team of mysterious asylum snatchers, the purple cross plastered on it's old metallic surface. 'They must have brought Cindry here.'
Cindry Fulfillment was the sweetheart of Klaus Baudelaire, and a friend of the other three Baudelaires, and was just as unfortunate as they were. Cindry had been snatched from her uncle and aunt's side, then locked inside a dark secret room in big mansion, then taken to a station in the ocean and forced to visit the Shivery Shrine, then dressed up as a doll by a mobster's daughter in a Casino, then forced to work as a waitress in a roadside diner with an absurd costume and bright yellow streaks in her hair, all the while being constantly separated from Klaus, and the last time they met, Klaus was disguised and Cindry didn't even recognize the Baudelaires, which only made them feel worse. They needed to rescue her, and they knew she was taken into Addams Asylum. That they knew very well; however, they did not know how to get themselves in. The gate was locked, and there was no security guard in sight.
'Look, there's a comunicator.' Sunny noticed, as she examined the wall in one side of the gate. Violet approached the comunicator. She pushed a button and a creaking metallic noise sounded. 'Um...Excuse me? We are the relatives of a recently admitted intern and we would like to pay her a visit.'
There was nothing but silence in return, and Violet tried again. This time, though, she got an answer. 'Oh. Visiting hours are over. Please, leave.' The voice said. Violet was really frustrated by this. 'Listen, we also seek shelter. It is about to rain and we are still a good ten miles away from Ophelia. We have two small children with us, please, just let us enter.'First, there was no answer. 'Two small children you say? Well, I certainly don't want small children being caught in the rain in autumn. You can get pneumonia. I'll open the gate. Please enter the Asylum, and beware...'
'Beware?' Violet worried. 'Yes, beware of the construction material piled up in the entrance, so you don't knock it over and cause an accident.' The unexpected, and not as ominous answer sent a breath of relief to the four Baudelaires, as the gate opened and they entered the Asylum grounds. A large square-like space with a few benches and an inactive fountain laid ahead of them. As they walked in silence towards the building, they noticed it's absolute silence. Only the wind, and the trees could be heard. It was getting dark, and very cold, and the Baudelaires were glad to have been let in, or they would be in for a harsh time outside in the woods, but it's my solemn duty to inform that to say that the Baudelaires would find themselves in a
harsh time in Addams Asylum would be a
very grand understatement.
As the voice said, there was a lot of construction material piled up near the entrance of the Asylum. 'They must be remodeling.' Klaus observed. Then, as they approached the double set of doors, the doors opened quickly to reveal a woman. She was tall, slim, and wore a white doctor's coat, and held a clipboard and a red pen. She had her long, wavy auburn hair tied up with hairclips, wrapping her head and tying behind it in a knot. She was very pale, and looked a bit tired, and had dark circles around her eyes, acentuated by the mascara she sported. 'Hello. I am Doctor Audrey Addams, assistent manager and psychiatrist of Addams Asylum. Oh, I see you
do have two small children with you. Please, enter. It is getting dark, and cold.' She said, smiling at the Baudelaires.
'Hi. We are...' Violet looked at Klaus. She was unsure whether or not to use an alias, and they hadn't quite given that much thought, to their great distress. Even a quick thinker like Violet, or Klaus, can come to a hault from time to time, and quickly making up aliases for her and her siblings was a bit too much to rush, so Violet did something unexpected. She told Audrey Addams her real name, and that of her siblings. 'Hi, I'm, Violet Baudelaire, and these are my brother, Klaus, and my sisters, Sunny and Beatrice.'
Expecting a reaction, as the Baudelaires had quite an infamous reputation, Violet stood completely still. 'Oh, I have a brother, too. He lives here, and is a psychiatrist like me. He is the head psychiatrist of Addams Asylum since our father died in the riot, years ago, and I'm afraid directing the asylum for so long has taken it's toll on his health...as well as mine, I do have to say.'
'Walk with me. I'll introduce you to my brother, he's probably in his office with Dr. Finch.' Audrey said, walking towards a flight of stairs covered in a dusty purple carpet. 'We've been having a quiet streak lately, it seems. The interns are all very at ease, which is a first, specially now being a full moon.' Audrey said, as she led the Baudelaires to the second story of the building. 'Oh, please don't think of me as superstitious. But in this Asylum, we have a history of bad full moons. The moon seems to exert a strange power and fascination in some of our interns.' Audrey said. She seemed
very intelligent, and to those who had the opportunity to meet her, she was. Her voice was also very soothing and pleasing to the ear, the kind of voice you would expect from a mother. But Audrey Addams was not a mother.
'Some of our interns suffer from severe
selenophobia. Do you know what that means?' Audrey asked, looking at Klaus, over her shoulder. 'Well, if it ends in
phobia, it is the fear of something.' Audrey smiled. The group was now walking in a dimly lit corridor with the same purple carpet. The light bulbs were just not strong enough to light up the whole place, and the reflections from the dark purple wallpaper gave everything a gloomy purple hue, and even Audrey's auburn hair seemed to fade in the intensity of it's color. '
Selenophobia, Mr. Baudelaire, is one's fear of the moon.'
'The moon? Such a strange thing to fear. I fear fires, and...' Klaus said, but Audrey interrupted him. 'Aah, an
arsonphobiac. Well, I guess I can be considered one as well. My father died in the fire in which the riot of years ago culminated. It destroyed an entire ward of this asylum, which at the time was our most important ward.'
'It destroyed just one ward?' Violet asked. Her previous experience with fires told her that fires were uncontrollable and very destructive. 'Yes, one ward. The firemen managed to contain the fire, which sadly killed many of our interns, and left others with severe injuries and trauma.'
'That is awful.' Klaus observed. 'Yes, it was. But, it was so long ago...No use dwelling on it. We're here.' Audrey said, suddenly stopping before a double set of doors, which were painted a blood red. The contrast with the general purple hue of the Asylum was striking, to say the least. The Baudelaires could overhear a conversation, with two male voices.
'Before we go in, I must ask you. Do not mind Dr. Finch. He is...
peculiar if you know what I mean. My brother is the only one who can...
talk with him properly. Don't worry, but...Just stay close to me, alright?' Audrey smiled, but the Baudelaires' minds were sent reeling with questions, questions they could not ask, as they were
about to meet the
peculiar Dr. Finch. Audrey opened the doors, and they entered.
Yes, my dear reader. It is often good to stop while on a long journey and stretch your limbs, crack your knuckles, and rest for a while. If you do wish to stop right now, stretch your legs, arms, and crack your knuckles, feel free to do so, and not get back to this story at all, as things for the Baudelaires are about to get only worse, and worse, in Addams Asylum, where 'anger is a brief insanity'.