Okay, I'm going to start today off by presenting Best Thread then. Also, I'm literally free-styling this speech on the spot, so while it won't be anywhere near in quality what the previous presenters have prepared, I hope it reminds those who still have to present that you can literally just make it up as you go along (I've been doing this for about 23 years now).
I made a LOT of threads this year, and I'm not really sure why. Or rather, I am. With Dante, Hermes, and Sherry Ann being absent it is going to take a certain amount of community effort to keep things going, and I kind of felt for a period that making random threads in Misc could at least help that a bit, even if I can't really contribute much to the Snicket side of the forum anymore.
Unsurprisingly, a lot of mine received 0 votes lmao.
Um, both of these are kind of contrasting topics. The nudity thread was another random one on my part. The Hermes thread offers some really beautiful reflections on his life and contributions to 667, which I'd encourage anyone who hasn't done so to check out.
Anyway, there is no tie this time. The winner of best thread, 2022 is:
I don't have time to type a proper award presentation, so I'll just add my thoughts. 1. I am supposed to give an award presentation for the Best Quirk. 2. I'm typing my thoughts. 3. Mr. Hermes and Roxy were both nominated for saying "Um" and being obsessed with fire, respectively. They both received 0 votes. 4. A moment of silence for our dearly departed. 5. 6. Mister M, Mr. Hermedy, and Mr. Mr. Esox Lucius were nominated for saying "You're my favorite", for allegedly being something which I won't describe here, and creating illustrations without being asked to. All of them received 1 vote each. 7. Mr. Terry the Cat was given 2 votes for coming up with "Conga-rats" 8. I should stalk better; I didn't know what that was. 10. Mr. Zortegus was rewarded 4 votes for his whole Hupu phase. 11. It's not a phase, mom 12. Semblance was given 5 votes for his use of the phrase "Rest Pleasantly" and using honorifics. 13. Egad! 14. There's no use thinking egad, Semblance. Remain calm. 15. Remain calm. 16. That's better. 17. Now, then, look at the message again. 18. Semblance was given 5 votes for his use of the phrase "Rest Pleasantly" and using honorifics. 19. Egad! 20. Stop it. 21. Right. 22. Take a deep breath. It often helps to take a deep breath, or better yet, several deep breaths. 23. 24. That was only one deep breath. 25. Semblance was given 5 votes for his use of the phrase "Rest Pleasantly" and using honorifics. 26. Stop! Take some deep breaths, or at least one more. 27. 28. All right, then. Now, do you think the message is some sort of joke? If so, then you can relax. If you don't, skip down to 34. 29. Yes, a joke. It must be. 30. But what if it isn't a joke? 31. It certainly doesn't look like a joke. 32. This is for Best Quirk, not Most Amusing. 33. So, why would this be a joke? 34. All right, it's not a joke. 35. If it's not a joke, then it's a great honor to be awarded this. 36. Rest Pleasantly.
Post by Violent Bun Fortuna on Apr 10, 2022 8:09:42 GMT -5
Annnnddd I’m back to present The Linda Rhaldeen Award for Most Valued Poster! This is a very special award, named as it is after such a sorely missed member of our forum, so being nominated at all is something of an honour.
But obviously winning is more of an honour, so let’s get on to the good stuff.
Next, we have Hermedy, Zortegus, Mister M, B., and catastrophist, who each received 1 vote. This is a particularly impressive feat for Hermedy, given that he never actually posts anything. Also for Catastrophist, who only posted 6 times last year. A polite round of applause, please.
Then, in second place, we have Hermes, with 3 votes. I don’t know what to say here except I’m sad he can’t take part in this year’s Darkies, but I hope he knew how much we all appreciated his many contributions to the forum. Raise your glasses, please.
Finally, that leaves just one member remaining, and it probably comes as no surprise to any of you that this year’s most valued poster is … Semblance, with a breakaway FIVE VOTES!! Congratulations, Semby! I hope you can wallow in delight and pride on this most joyous of days. Everyone, please behave like absolute maniacs as you celebrate Semblance's supremacy.
Post by urban-letter-opener on Apr 10, 2022 8:22:35 GMT -5
Once again, urban-letter-opener!
Hello again! I'm here to present the award for Most Improved. After the amazing response to the first and only issue of the "667 Murmurer", I have decided to go in a totally different direction for this award presentation. You see, I've decided that, in the interest of transparency, I shall list the ways in which each of our nominees has improved — one for each point that our noms have received.
Let's start with Terry Craig —
(He got zero votes. But he's first in my heart!! Just behind the two (spoilers!!!) winners of this award.)
Zortegus — -"hupu" is a blessing unto this forum. I get the feeling that when humanity is gone 3 years from now, the aliens will see this forum and assume "hupu" was a deity of ours.
(Unfortunately, Zortegus has managed to remain very consistent in all other aspects of his memberhood. I smell a different award coming his way...)
Jean Lucio — -Jean has thankfully given up the goat on his Dark Stories, mysteries so ickleing strange that I'm kind of convinced that Jean likes to watch other people clutch their heads in agony. -Jean's artwork has greatly increased, both in number and in quality, over the past year. I would frame the 667 Dark Asylum pictures... if they didn't make me feel like I was living inside "Yume Nikki". -His rereadings of Lemony Snicket's work, totally without any help or acknowledgment from ANYONE WHATSOEVER (sorry, slipped into my gossip voice there), are honestly pretty inspirational.
(This leaves Jean with three points. Nice work, man! Maybe you haven't won 667's Most Improved, but I think you've won life's Most Improved this year. Viva Matt Litory!)
Roxy222 — -Roxy has not confronted Daniel Handler over Zoom this past year. -Roxy has not driven to Daniel Handler's house to lecture him on the greatness of Esme Squalor. -Roxy has not used a non-denominational space laser to carve "ESME IS IN" across her home nation. -Roxy does not pretend to be a villainous lady in an octopus dress in this forum anymore. (When she goes to the grocery store for milk... that's another matter)
(All told, Roxy's earned herself a very respectable four points! Beautifully done!)
BUT WHAT'S THIS?? A CHALLENGER APPROACHES! HIS NAME IS...
Mister M — how have you improved? Let me count the ways. -Black Ink -The Marvelous Marriage (please continue that one!) -The Quantum Possibility Engine -Tales from a Quiet World
That's. Wait, that's four points! We have a tie! Okay, hands to your holsters. When I say go, you'll both shoot and whoever dies— sorry, what? We don't do tiebreakers here?
Goncragulations ROXY and MISTER M! I'm not sure who's in charge of your banner, but I'm sure somebody does and will get to you soon. Love ya <3