J
Bewildered Beginner
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Post by J on Oct 22, 2003 20:53:04 GMT -5
By now, you should know not to read these books. I usually go into a detailed explanation, but this is book the eleventh, and you have to learn things eventually, and I tried to teach you by giving you warnins and warnings, but now it is out of my hands. You have made the fatal mistake of reading this book. Just to give you a chance to close this book, you take it far, far away, far away from your best friend, your worst enemy, and that hobo so that no one can read it, I will write no more on this page.
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J
Bewildered Beginner
Posts: 0
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Post by J on Oct 22, 2003 21:21:50 GMT -5
(No one can imitate The Snicket. It sounds horrible if you try. I learn the hard way. Ultra bad fanficness ahead.)
If you are reading this, then you have directly disobeyed my orders and you deserve the sick feeling from reading about the Baudelaires' misfortune. The woke up, feelign groggy from the rapid ride in a stream. Klaus woke up first, groaned and blinked his eyes. He saw something in the sky. He blinked again. He shot up. Sunny was the second to wake up and the first to scream. "Hekker! Quagmires!" She screeched, which meant something along the lines of, "THAT'S THE SELF-SUSTAINING HOT-AIR MOBILE HOME THAT HECTOR AND DUNCAN AND ISADORA ESCAPED IN! SIGNAL THEM! HURRY! QUICK!" "Violet! Make a fire!" Klaus shouted. "Quick!" Sunny exclaimed. "I-I can't!" "VFD!" Sunny shouted, which meant something along the lines of "Find the Verdant Flame Devices!" "I don't know where they are!" Violet cried. It was very unfortunate, as the majority of their lives were, that they had to signal a hot air ballon that was flying high up in the sky in a second's notice, especially when it maybe your last chance for at least a very, very long time, to cross paths. "WE'RE GOING TO MISS IT!" Klaus yelled. "Klaus! Please! Here they are. There are only two left. What if they don't work?" "Try. Smoke." Sunny said, which meant "It's worth a try. Smoke it." I should stop again, just to warn you that smoking is bad, unless it is the only way to reunite with your friend and last remaining guardian. Violet didn't want to smoke, but she didn't want to pass up the chance to see Duncan and Isadora again. "Smoke!" Sunny exclaimed. Violet smoked the VFD and started coughing. "More!" "C-can't." She managed another smoke, but she went into a bigger fit of coughing and dropped it. "Oh no!" Klaus exclaimed. "Where's the other one?" "THE WORLD IS QUIET! THE WORLD IS QUIET HERE!" Echoed Hector's voice. "W-what?" Klaus asked, looking up. "VOLUNTEERS!" Duncan yelled. "QUAGMIRES!" Klaus yelled. "KLAUS?" Isadora asked. "YES! AND-AND YOUR BROTHER IS ALIVE!" Klaus called back up. "QUIGLEY?" Duncan and Isadora asked. "I'M LOWERING A LADDER--WE FIXED IT!" Hector yelled. "AND I'LL TRY TO GET THIS AS CLOSE TO THE GROUND AS POSSIBLE!" If you have been reading about the Baudelair's unfortunate lives, you might expect the ladder to not be long enough, or the self-sustaning mobile home to have gone down low enough, or for the Baudelaires to reach the ladder but fall, or for it to be a very well-done trap by Olaf and his associates. But the ladder was long enough and the home went down far enough. The ladder was strong enough to support the Baudelaire's weight and it was not an elaborate trap by Olaf. Klaus was the first one to grab hold of the ladder. He kept thinking about what he would tell the Quagmires and Hector, and what they had to tell him. Violet, with Sunny clinging on tightly to her back, was in disbelief. It was too good to be true. They had finally had some luck in their life. There had to be a catch. Maybe there wasn't, she thought. Maybe things will turn around. Of course, she was wrong for the most part. It was too good, but not good enough not to be true. They had gotten some luck, but things were not going to change by much. Sunny was thinking about what their self sustaning home would be like, and what it would be like growing up with the same people. And what had Hector done for the bathroom? And what about their health? While it was certainly exciting, and it was better than being constantly on the run from Olaf, Sunny was worried about their weird lifestyle. Klaus climbed the last rung and hopped into one of the baskets, where the Quagmires were sobbing and shouting, and Hector was grinning. "You made it!" Duncan cried. "Did...did you say Quigley was alive?" Isadora asked. "Yes. He survived. He was the survivor." Klaus said. "Well, I guess that makes one more member of VFD." Hector said. "What?" Klaus asked. "Did you just say..." Violet said. "Gluka?" Sunny asked.
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Post by DetectiveDupin on Oct 23, 2003 5:29:49 GMT -5
Carry On!
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Post by cwm3 on Oct 23, 2003 5:46:27 GMT -5
Nice. Very nice. Very very nice.
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Post by DetectiveDupin on Oct 23, 2003 10:18:33 GMT -5
Let this continue!
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J
Bewildered Beginner
Posts: 0
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Post by J on Oct 23, 2003 12:34:04 GMT -5
When you think you know a person and then they tell you something surprising, you usually don't believe them without a fight. Which is what the Baudelaires did, though they were quite rude. "If you're a member of VFD," Klaus yelled. "Why didn't you tell us what it was?" "If you're a member of VFD and Jacque's a member of VFD, why didn't you try and save him?" Violet exclaimed. "Pilnioklera!" Sunny yelled, which meant "And if VFD has unfinished business on the ground, why would you make it so this can never, ever go down?" "Klaus, I was going to wait until we knew each other more, and until you and your siblings got older. Maybe a year. Violet, if I had said something, I probably would have been burned at the stake, and I'm afraid of fire, due to several job related incidents. If you could even call them that..." If you have been in a car and the car hit another car, leading to some damage, you may or may not have been brave enough to go into another car. If you were brave enough, and the second time you stepped into a car, it exploded, then you may be dead or alive, but afraid of cars. So you may decide to walk as your mode of transportation. But as your walking, a car runs of you, so you might develop an all-out fear of cars, because in them or not, you could have almost died because of them three times. If you lost your home, your friends' houses, your organization's headquarters, the love of your life, your brother and all your organization stood for to a bunch of arsonists, and everything you lost in your entire was no more than two degrees, a word which here means "connections", from fire, then chances are you are afraid of fire. "And I don't know what 'pilnioklera'" Said Hector. "That's OK. We're sorry. It was rude of us. We just hadn't had many good things happened to us that there wasn't a catch to." Violet said. "Perfectly understandable." Hector said. "We have to get to Hotel Denoument. That's the last safe place." Klaus said. "Then we have to find away to make this able to go down and stay down, but then to make it able to go up and stay up again. It was stupid of me not to make it at first, but the Council drove me insane! I just wanted to get out of there." "It maybe hard or impossible to do it while the balloon is still running, though. And are you sure you took every mechanical device?" Violet asked. "Every thing." Hector said. "They're in the basket after the next." Violet went over to the next basket, then the other one and the others stayed, except for Hector, who went to go make tacos. Klaus turned to ask Isadroa and Duncan what VFD stood for, but they got him first. "How did Quigley look? Where is he now? Did he seem alright?" Isadora asked. "How did he do it? What did he tell you? Did Olaf get him?" Duncan asked. Though Klaus was a bit annoyed that he had to wait longer for an answer, it wasn't as though they only had a split second together. They were living together now, in the same house, even though the house was a bit weird. He began to tell them about Quigley, but he soon burst into telling them the whole story. "The man with a beard but no hair--or was it the woman?-- said that they would try to catch up to this." Klaus said. "Oh no! They may try to kill us!" Duncan exclaimed. Klaus had left out that they had said that because he didn't want to rain on their parade, an expression which means "make them upset even though they just found out that their brother was alive." "They were going to try and get here through starving eagles." Klaus said. "So I don't think you have to worry." "I should write a poem about that. Try and get here via dying birds, and you won't be alive to say a word." Isadora said. "Let's hope that's the case." Klaus said. It wasn't, however. Olaf survives this book and I'm afraid he survives the next, but someone doesn't, even though I'd love to change these books to "fiction" and say that the person who dies doesn't, and that Olaf dies instead, but it is my duty to write down every fact, no matter how depressing they are. But it is not your duty to read it. You have several chances before chapter 13 to put down this book and to avoid having the knowledge that the true VFD orginization, not the horrid, awful, evil one, will be at least one member short. "Maybe we'll be able to fight them." Duncan said. "Fight whom?" Hector asked, from another basket. "I don't like fighting." The Baudelaires were reminded of Jerome Squalor, one of their better guardians, who had been married to Esme. He never liked fighting and had no backbone, so anyone was allowed to take advantage of him. "Olaf and his associates." Klaus said. "Well, I suppose we'd have to fight them. The tacos are almost done, I'll go check on Violet."
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Post by sunsun on Oct 23, 2003 15:18:34 GMT -5
Hey, that's really good! Write more! Write more!
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Post by DetectiveDupin on Oct 23, 2003 15:50:17 GMT -5
More! More!
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Post by Tyler on Oct 23, 2003 19:41:49 GMT -5
Very good! Duncan and Violet love in chapter three...?
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J
Bewildered Beginner
Posts: 0
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Post by J on Oct 23, 2003 20:51:12 GMT -5
"Klaus," Hector said. "Have you seen the library? I remember you liked books." "No, I haven't. But I will after dinner." Klaus said. "Violet, were you able to find something that would help this go down?" "Yes, but it will take at least three weeks, and that's being optimistic." Violet said. "Well,we might get to Hotel Denoument in one." Hector said. "That can be a problem." Isadora said. "We can always drive back." Hector said. Sunny yawned. "I'll go take Sunny to one of the rooms." Violet said. Violet got up and walked to one of the baskets that contained a crib, along with two beds. Then, she stared off the edge of the basket, looking for someone. Even when there is no hope of seeing a person whom you are looking for, you look anyway, just because. Sometimes I find myself looking out the window or waiting for a letter from Beatrice, even though I know it will never happen, ever again. "Violet?" A voice asked. "Duncan! Er...hello. What...what are you doing here?" Violet asked, startled. "I just wanted to make sure if you're alright." "Yeah...So, er, how has living here been?" "It's boring, but it's safe. Hector has been training us for VFD." "What--" Violet started to ask, but Klaus climbed into the basket. It is very irritating when your best friends, all your guardians and seemingly everyone else around you know something you don't, but you want to know so badly what it is and when you are 1/100 of a second away from finding it out, someone interuppts or something happens to prevent you from knowing it. "Hello, Klaus." Duncan said, standing up. "Hello, Duncan." Klaus said. "I just wanted to see my room. I found a book called History of the Sugarbowl. Never in my entire carreer of reading have I ever suspected there'd be a book about that but I'm glad there was." Of course, Klaus would soon be in for a disappointment, when the History of the Sugarbowl turned out to be just that, and nothing more. If he had wanted to know the VFD's sugarbowl secret, then he'd have to read the History of VFD, but the only book that would have that would be The History of VFD. Unfortunately, that book would be long, confusing and no one knows the exact history of VFD. Klaus would be disappointed when the only thing he learned from the book was that he hadn't learned anything at all and that reading a 500 page book about sugar bowls was nothing but a waste of time. But the disappointment of having one, long, boring hour paled in comparison--a phrase which means, "seemed like absolutely nothing"--to the horrors that awaited him and his sisters. "I'm tired, I think I'll go to sleep."Duncan said. He walked quickly to the basket where Isadora was sleeping.
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Post by Tyler on Oct 24, 2003 17:35:32 GMT -5
Ahhh... More... More!
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J
Bewildered Beginner
Posts: 0
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Post by J on Oct 26, 2003 12:01:05 GMT -5
Violet had tried to go to sleep, but she couldn't. She got up in the middle of the night and walked to the invention studio basket. How could she sleep, when there was no way to get down to the land? She walked around, looking for a flashlight. It was dark. She shuddered. Imagine what would have happened if she had to find her way blindly and fell... She remembered seeing a flashlight on the kitchen counter. She walked to the kitchen and grabbed the flashlight and shone it on Low. She didn't want anyone waking up.
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maesterkenobiyahoocom
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Post by maesterkenobiyahoocom on Nov 9, 2003 13:17:00 GMT -5
what is the book called.
TELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
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Post by Tyler on Nov 9, 2003 13:19:21 GMT -5
I need more of this! More! NOW! MORE!
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Post by DetectiveDupin on Nov 9, 2003 13:56:22 GMT -5
Must have more.... Must have more.....
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