Post by Sora on Jun 15, 2007 15:29:01 GMT -5
667, A Rock Musical in Three Acts
By Sora
The story of a nation built on a faith that no-one else would take in, its rise to fame, and its most tumultuous times. This is the tale of a land where those of great knowledge gathered for the greater good, and the betrayals that nearly brought its legacy crashing to the ground. This, is the story of 667.
In Rock Musical form.
The Acts
Act One : Snicketism
A small group of loyal Snicketeers are shunned from their native land, and forced to start their own civilization based in their radical new faith. A leader emerges, and a nation is born.
Act Two : Fame and War
667 is faced with a dramatic change as Snicketism sweeps the world in its arms, filling the coalition with new converts. A rival rises from the popularity and threatens to make 667 redundant. Two heroes emerge from the dust of the pilgrims of Snicketism, bringing 667 into a new age.
Act Three : As the works draw to a close……
The prophesised Great Conclusion draws closer, and 667 changes radically to prepare. A young girl stumbles upon a position of power, and brings 667to it’s knees. The fate of the nation is left in the air and exodus ensues. One final heroine rises from the darkness that is unfolding, and takes the destiny of 667 in her hands.
The Cast:
Snicketeers:
Tragedy Leader and founder of 667
Swans A politician, turned believer
Rikku
Dupin An acclaimed writer
VioletB (Ann)
Pandora
Tyler
Derik
Celinra
Sam
Charlotte
Betsy
Kyle
Sora
Pilgrims of Snicketism
Dante A research specialist
Antenora A used bookstore owner
P.J.
Snicket A devout fan
Jacques
Ila
Jerome Squalor
Alice
Anna Karenia
Kimia
Trish
Michael
J
Shruti
Amber
Ennui
Linda
Akbar
Libitna
Those Who Came Later
All Due Respect (Bella)
Twistedbrain
Triangle Eyes
Jemima A cat loving actress
Gigi A school teacher
Wasabi
Hanna Squalor
Jenny
Cybermystery
The Disciple
Act One: Snicketism
The Scene: The cold gates of Literature Manor stand in the background. Literature Manor, the capital building of Literature, a coalition of nations in the western hemisphere of The WEB. A group of protesters are outside the grounds, some with picket signs, some with megaphones, others with large bound books in their hands. They are led by a young man, early twenties or very late teens. He is on a platform shouting towards the Manor.
Tragedy: We will not be oppressed any longer! Do you hear me? We will not be forced to read our books of faith in secret, or pray to our lord in the quiet vicinity of our basements! We are people, but we are more then that. What are we people?
Snicketeers: We are disciples of Snicketism!
Snicketism
When the misfortune hits
And the good times end
We fall into despair and hate
But beyond the void
Hanging….
Like a bulb of hope
Sni..cke..tism…
Sni..cke..tism…
Snicketism!
Unfortunate events shroud us all
Fires burn our homes down
Children cry
Children die
But beyond the chasm
Clutched in our hands
Like the light at the end of the tunnel
Sni..cke..tism…
Sni..cke..tism…
Tragedy:
Oh Snicketism!
You teach me how to live
And care and try
That beyond the darkness
We can all rise
Swans:
We’ll climb the mountain
Like Violet did
We’ll find the reason
Like Klaus did
We’ll break the chains
Of our limitations
Like Sunny DID!
Snicketeers:
Like they did!
Unfortunate Events shroud us all
Fires burn in our hearts
Parents die
Evil thrives
But it can’t ruin is all!
Sni..cke..tism
Sni..cke..tism
Sni,,cke,,tism
Sni..cke..tism
Snicketism!-----------------------------
One of the gates open mechanically. A man walks out with a tattoo of a lightning bolt prominent on his forhead. His hands are out and open, in a sign of peace. The protesters momentarily stop chanting, and watch him.
Brother Ron: Citizens of Literature! My name is Brother Ronald, one of the high priests of the Church of Potter.
Several Snicketeers hiss at this.
We know that you feel insubordinate in comparison to the followers of Potter, but you need not feel that way any longer. The magic of our lord Harry Potter will take each and everyone of you in with arms as open as mine. The Church is offering you opportunity, and I suggest you grasp it by the wands.
Some Snicketeers look at each other nervously, while others start screaming BOO at Brother Ron. Tragedy steps down from the platform and walks forward to face him.
Tragedy: You claim that my people feel insubordinate when faced with your Church. We feel no such way. Our faith teaches us that we must be strong even when everyone else around us has become volatile. The Unfortunate Events Society of Snicketeers will not be silenced! WE WILL NOT BE SILENCED! Do you hear me?
Brother Ron: Duh. You are standing right in front of me.
Tragedy: Don’t get coy with me mister! I know all your little tricks, Brother Ronald. I too was once a follower of Potter. But I have seen the light, or the lack of it, and know now that Snicketism is the faith of the future. We are Literature citizens, and we deserve the respect that Potterists, Tolkeinians, and Pratchetteers have received for so long. Am I right?
Looks at fellow Snicketeets.
Pandora: I lived a life of pain and suffering under Potterist rule. I thought I would be forced to embrace magic and mythical beasts for the rest of my life. Then I met Tragedy, and he showed me the true path. The path of Snicketism!
Brother Ron raises his eyebrows, then whispers something to a guard near the gates. He immediately raises a gun and points it at Tragedy. The Snicketeers gasp in rage and shock. Tragedy slowly steps back , staring at the barrel.
Tragedy: This is an outrage! You can’t just go and point a gun at a private citizen!
Brother Ron: (laughing) I can do whatever I want with you heretics. You are no longer Literaturans. You’ve been banished. For good. I was sent out to here to tell you and use force if needed to get you to leave. I had hoped I could sway you to change your poor pitiful minds, but clearly that is futile. Guards, please escort Mr…what’s your name again?
Tragedy: Mr. Kiss My Ass, you sonofa…
Brother Ron: Please escort Mr. Kissmyass and his merry band of fools out of Literature City, and make sure they leave the country. Have a good day now Snogiteers.
Brother Ron blows kisses towards the Snicketeers, then walks through the gates back to the manor. The guards aim their guns at the crowd and force them to move down the cobblestone path towards stage left. The Snicketeers call out in outrage at the manor, but continue walking away.
Tragedy: You won’t get away with this! We are Snicketeers, but we have rights! We Have Rights! (to guard with gun pointed into his back) I get the ruddy point! Jeez, when you’re not wanted, you really get the full treatment don’t you?
Nice uniforms by the way, I like the maroon.
Guard 1: Kudos, my wife thinks so too. It doesn’t make me a little to full figured does it?
All exit.
Scene Two
The Snicketeers are all sitting around a campfire, in the middle of a dense forest, Some are on logs, some are in the grass. They all look glum and disheartened. Tragedy is poking the fire with a long stick.
Swans: So what is your plan Tragedy dear? We are in a bit of a predicament here.
Rikku: Oh really, Swans? A bit of a predicament you say? We are in the friggen woods with no food…
Pandora: I told you we should have brought snacks with us to the protest.
Rikku: No food, little water, and no shelter. We aren’t exactly the strongest people in the world, and we have no weapons….
Derik: Weapons? We don’t need weapons. (holds up towel) I have Colin, my trusty towel. He’ll protect us from anything!
Sora: Oh shut up you fool, that won’t help us with anything.
Derik: Won’t help us? Colin can help anyone! Don’t put him down! Just because you don’t have a trusty bathroom object to help you!
Derik stands and holds his towel above his head. Rikku looks like she wants to say something, but shakes her head in annoyance and prods the fire.
Colin
Once upon a watching for Colin
Colin is a sixteen year old bath towel
Literature’s psychedelic defender!
Oh Colin
Oh oh Colin
Oh oh
Watch out for my Colin
Have you seen,
My sixteen year old
Tattered towel
Heard a story
That he got busted for beating up this
Wash cloth
Whoah oh whoah
Ooo whoah!
Once upon a looking for Colin
Colin is a sixteen year old bath towel
Oh Colin
Oh oh Colin
Oh oh
Watch out for my Colin
I’ve been to Tolkein land
And saw him knock out
The hobbit lights
In the online porn pennisula
He killed three
Child predators
He’s reincarnated
And so are they all!
And in this lifetime
He’ll rule!
Before he dries
Before he dries!
Just sit back
And look out for Colin
Literature’s psychedelic defender!
Oh Colin
Oh oh Colin
Oh oh
Watch out for my Colin
Watch out for my Colin
Watch out for my colin
Colin!
--------------------------------------------
All cast stare blankly at Derik.
Sam: Dude, I hope you never see the end of a beer bottle in your lifetime, cause I’m seriously thinking the world might come to end if you do.
Kyle runs in from Stage right, panting in exhaustion.
Kyle: The prostitutes and gigolos are coming! The prostitutes and gigolos are coming! They’re migrating from porn isle in an Exodus! I think they are headed for the Republic of Myspace!
Snicketeers (except Kyle): Adult Entertainmenters! Oh dear! Oh my!
Swans: We have to get out of here! They might try to preform lude acts on us! We can’t just sit here like ducks.
Pandora: Quick, put out the fire and let’s go!
VioletB: Where are we going to go though?
All pause to contemplate this problem.
Where Do We Go?
Where do we go?
(Tragedy) Follow the river!
Where do we go?
(Pandora) Make up a plan,,,,
Where is there something
Where is the someone
That can show the path to
Blissful peace….
Blissful peace!
(Swans) Where do I go/
Should I have children
What do I do
Is my womb dead?
Is there an answer
In there sweet faces
That tells me how to
Pray in peace…
(Chorus) Oh Blissful peace
Blissful peace….
Follow the wind song
Follow Colin
Follow the neon
In Violet and Quigley’s eyes!
(VioletB) Down to the porn isle…
(Dupin) Up to Search Engines
(Tragedy) Into a city
Where the truth lies
(chorus) Where do we go?
(Sam) Ask for bloody directions ya brain box idiots.
---------------------------------------
All cast pause again to think this comment over. Suddenly VioletB notices something in the distance, and jumps.
VioletB: Do you smell smoke?
All: Where there is smoke, there is fire!
Derik: Oh my! Do you think the almighty Snicket is gracing us with his presence?
Sora: Not likely. He only speaks through his angel, Daniel Handler. Duh.
Smoke begins to rise from the background and swirls toward cast.
Tragedy: The prostitutes have arrived!
Kyle: No wait! I think it might be someone else.
Swans: Who else could it be?
Kyle: I used to know this guy from way back who came from a far distant nation, called ‘Free Forums.’ Quite a brain he was. Anyway, he told me that this other guy,
Derik: Wait, they aren’t the same person?
Kyle: No, I knew this guy who knew this other guy, who…
Derik: So you don’t actually know the person you are speaking of?
Kyle: No you really cool member, I didn’t but…
Derik: So you’re sort of existentially speaking for him…
Celinra: Look, the prostitutes are near, can we just get on with the salvation explanation please?
Kyle: (smiling in exasperation) Thank you. As I was saying, I knew this mate who knew this other mate..
Derik: You worked on a ship? I didn’t know that..
All: Will you SHUT UP!
Derik: (grumbling) Fine you ungrateful little….see if Colin helps you…..errr
All exit, following Kyle.
By Sora
The story of a nation built on a faith that no-one else would take in, its rise to fame, and its most tumultuous times. This is the tale of a land where those of great knowledge gathered for the greater good, and the betrayals that nearly brought its legacy crashing to the ground. This, is the story of 667.
In Rock Musical form.
The Acts
Act One : Snicketism
A small group of loyal Snicketeers are shunned from their native land, and forced to start their own civilization based in their radical new faith. A leader emerges, and a nation is born.
Act Two : Fame and War
667 is faced with a dramatic change as Snicketism sweeps the world in its arms, filling the coalition with new converts. A rival rises from the popularity and threatens to make 667 redundant. Two heroes emerge from the dust of the pilgrims of Snicketism, bringing 667 into a new age.
Act Three : As the works draw to a close……
The prophesised Great Conclusion draws closer, and 667 changes radically to prepare. A young girl stumbles upon a position of power, and brings 667to it’s knees. The fate of the nation is left in the air and exodus ensues. One final heroine rises from the darkness that is unfolding, and takes the destiny of 667 in her hands.
The Cast:
Snicketeers:
Tragedy Leader and founder of 667
Swans A politician, turned believer
Rikku
Dupin An acclaimed writer
VioletB (Ann)
Pandora
Tyler
Derik
Celinra
Sam
Charlotte
Betsy
Kyle
Sora
Pilgrims of Snicketism
Dante A research specialist
Antenora A used bookstore owner
P.J.
Snicket A devout fan
Jacques
Ila
Jerome Squalor
Alice
Anna Karenia
Kimia
Trish
Michael
J
Shruti
Amber
Ennui
Linda
Akbar
Libitna
Those Who Came Later
All Due Respect (Bella)
Twistedbrain
Triangle Eyes
Jemima A cat loving actress
Gigi A school teacher
Wasabi
Hanna Squalor
Jenny
Cybermystery
The Disciple
Act One: Snicketism
The Scene: The cold gates of Literature Manor stand in the background. Literature Manor, the capital building of Literature, a coalition of nations in the western hemisphere of The WEB. A group of protesters are outside the grounds, some with picket signs, some with megaphones, others with large bound books in their hands. They are led by a young man, early twenties or very late teens. He is on a platform shouting towards the Manor.
Tragedy: We will not be oppressed any longer! Do you hear me? We will not be forced to read our books of faith in secret, or pray to our lord in the quiet vicinity of our basements! We are people, but we are more then that. What are we people?
Snicketeers: We are disciples of Snicketism!
Snicketism
When the misfortune hits
And the good times end
We fall into despair and hate
But beyond the void
Hanging….
Like a bulb of hope
Sni..cke..tism…
Sni..cke..tism…
Snicketism!
Unfortunate events shroud us all
Fires burn our homes down
Children cry
Children die
But beyond the chasm
Clutched in our hands
Like the light at the end of the tunnel
Sni..cke..tism…
Sni..cke..tism…
Tragedy:
Oh Snicketism!
You teach me how to live
And care and try
That beyond the darkness
We can all rise
Swans:
We’ll climb the mountain
Like Violet did
We’ll find the reason
Like Klaus did
We’ll break the chains
Of our limitations
Like Sunny DID!
Snicketeers:
Like they did!
Unfortunate Events shroud us all
Fires burn in our hearts
Parents die
Evil thrives
But it can’t ruin is all!
Sni..cke..tism
Sni..cke..tism
Sni,,cke,,tism
Sni..cke..tism
Snicketism!-----------------------------
One of the gates open mechanically. A man walks out with a tattoo of a lightning bolt prominent on his forhead. His hands are out and open, in a sign of peace. The protesters momentarily stop chanting, and watch him.
Brother Ron: Citizens of Literature! My name is Brother Ronald, one of the high priests of the Church of Potter.
Several Snicketeers hiss at this.
We know that you feel insubordinate in comparison to the followers of Potter, but you need not feel that way any longer. The magic of our lord Harry Potter will take each and everyone of you in with arms as open as mine. The Church is offering you opportunity, and I suggest you grasp it by the wands.
Some Snicketeers look at each other nervously, while others start screaming BOO at Brother Ron. Tragedy steps down from the platform and walks forward to face him.
Tragedy: You claim that my people feel insubordinate when faced with your Church. We feel no such way. Our faith teaches us that we must be strong even when everyone else around us has become volatile. The Unfortunate Events Society of Snicketeers will not be silenced! WE WILL NOT BE SILENCED! Do you hear me?
Brother Ron: Duh. You are standing right in front of me.
Tragedy: Don’t get coy with me mister! I know all your little tricks, Brother Ronald. I too was once a follower of Potter. But I have seen the light, or the lack of it, and know now that Snicketism is the faith of the future. We are Literature citizens, and we deserve the respect that Potterists, Tolkeinians, and Pratchetteers have received for so long. Am I right?
Looks at fellow Snicketeets.
Pandora: I lived a life of pain and suffering under Potterist rule. I thought I would be forced to embrace magic and mythical beasts for the rest of my life. Then I met Tragedy, and he showed me the true path. The path of Snicketism!
Brother Ron raises his eyebrows, then whispers something to a guard near the gates. He immediately raises a gun and points it at Tragedy. The Snicketeers gasp in rage and shock. Tragedy slowly steps back , staring at the barrel.
Tragedy: This is an outrage! You can’t just go and point a gun at a private citizen!
Brother Ron: (laughing) I can do whatever I want with you heretics. You are no longer Literaturans. You’ve been banished. For good. I was sent out to here to tell you and use force if needed to get you to leave. I had hoped I could sway you to change your poor pitiful minds, but clearly that is futile. Guards, please escort Mr…what’s your name again?
Tragedy: Mr. Kiss My Ass, you sonofa…
Brother Ron: Please escort Mr. Kissmyass and his merry band of fools out of Literature City, and make sure they leave the country. Have a good day now Snogiteers.
Brother Ron blows kisses towards the Snicketeers, then walks through the gates back to the manor. The guards aim their guns at the crowd and force them to move down the cobblestone path towards stage left. The Snicketeers call out in outrage at the manor, but continue walking away.
Tragedy: You won’t get away with this! We are Snicketeers, but we have rights! We Have Rights! (to guard with gun pointed into his back) I get the ruddy point! Jeez, when you’re not wanted, you really get the full treatment don’t you?
Nice uniforms by the way, I like the maroon.
Guard 1: Kudos, my wife thinks so too. It doesn’t make me a little to full figured does it?
All exit.
Scene Two
The Snicketeers are all sitting around a campfire, in the middle of a dense forest, Some are on logs, some are in the grass. They all look glum and disheartened. Tragedy is poking the fire with a long stick.
Swans: So what is your plan Tragedy dear? We are in a bit of a predicament here.
Rikku: Oh really, Swans? A bit of a predicament you say? We are in the friggen woods with no food…
Pandora: I told you we should have brought snacks with us to the protest.
Rikku: No food, little water, and no shelter. We aren’t exactly the strongest people in the world, and we have no weapons….
Derik: Weapons? We don’t need weapons. (holds up towel) I have Colin, my trusty towel. He’ll protect us from anything!
Sora: Oh shut up you fool, that won’t help us with anything.
Derik: Won’t help us? Colin can help anyone! Don’t put him down! Just because you don’t have a trusty bathroom object to help you!
Derik stands and holds his towel above his head. Rikku looks like she wants to say something, but shakes her head in annoyance and prods the fire.
Colin
Once upon a watching for Colin
Colin is a sixteen year old bath towel
Literature’s psychedelic defender!
Oh Colin
Oh oh Colin
Oh oh
Watch out for my Colin
Have you seen,
My sixteen year old
Tattered towel
Heard a story
That he got busted for beating up this
Wash cloth
Whoah oh whoah
Ooo whoah!
Once upon a looking for Colin
Colin is a sixteen year old bath towel
Oh Colin
Oh oh Colin
Oh oh
Watch out for my Colin
I’ve been to Tolkein land
And saw him knock out
The hobbit lights
In the online porn pennisula
He killed three
Child predators
He’s reincarnated
And so are they all!
And in this lifetime
He’ll rule!
Before he dries
Before he dries!
Just sit back
And look out for Colin
Literature’s psychedelic defender!
Oh Colin
Oh oh Colin
Oh oh
Watch out for my Colin
Watch out for my Colin
Watch out for my colin
Colin!
--------------------------------------------
All cast stare blankly at Derik.
Sam: Dude, I hope you never see the end of a beer bottle in your lifetime, cause I’m seriously thinking the world might come to end if you do.
Kyle runs in from Stage right, panting in exhaustion.
Kyle: The prostitutes and gigolos are coming! The prostitutes and gigolos are coming! They’re migrating from porn isle in an Exodus! I think they are headed for the Republic of Myspace!
Snicketeers (except Kyle): Adult Entertainmenters! Oh dear! Oh my!
Swans: We have to get out of here! They might try to preform lude acts on us! We can’t just sit here like ducks.
Pandora: Quick, put out the fire and let’s go!
VioletB: Where are we going to go though?
All pause to contemplate this problem.
Where Do We Go?
Where do we go?
(Tragedy) Follow the river!
Where do we go?
(Pandora) Make up a plan,,,,
Where is there something
Where is the someone
That can show the path to
Blissful peace….
Blissful peace!
(Swans) Where do I go/
Should I have children
What do I do
Is my womb dead?
Is there an answer
In there sweet faces
That tells me how to
Pray in peace…
(Chorus) Oh Blissful peace
Blissful peace….
Follow the wind song
Follow Colin
Follow the neon
In Violet and Quigley’s eyes!
(VioletB) Down to the porn isle…
(Dupin) Up to Search Engines
(Tragedy) Into a city
Where the truth lies
(chorus) Where do we go?
(Sam) Ask for bloody directions ya brain box idiots.
---------------------------------------
All cast pause again to think this comment over. Suddenly VioletB notices something in the distance, and jumps.
VioletB: Do you smell smoke?
All: Where there is smoke, there is fire!
Derik: Oh my! Do you think the almighty Snicket is gracing us with his presence?
Sora: Not likely. He only speaks through his angel, Daniel Handler. Duh.
Smoke begins to rise from the background and swirls toward cast.
Tragedy: The prostitutes have arrived!
Kyle: No wait! I think it might be someone else.
Swans: Who else could it be?
Kyle: I used to know this guy from way back who came from a far distant nation, called ‘Free Forums.’ Quite a brain he was. Anyway, he told me that this other guy,
Derik: Wait, they aren’t the same person?
Kyle: No, I knew this guy who knew this other guy, who…
Derik: So you don’t actually know the person you are speaking of?
Kyle: No you really cool member, I didn’t but…
Derik: So you’re sort of existentially speaking for him…
Celinra: Look, the prostitutes are near, can we just get on with the salvation explanation please?
Kyle: (smiling in exasperation) Thank you. As I was saying, I knew this mate who knew this other mate..
Derik: You worked on a ship? I didn’t know that..
All: Will you SHUT UP!
Derik: (grumbling) Fine you ungrateful little….see if Colin helps you…..errr
All exit, following Kyle.