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Post by Jenny on Jul 14, 2007 16:29:28 GMT -5
She sat down. 'I don't suppose you could forgive me in just ordinary clothes, could you?' she asked innocently.
Jerome swiped at her with a newspaper.
'You make it sound like I only speak to you when you're wearing vegetables.'
'Or nothing.'
He laughed, folding his arms.
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Post by Hanna Squalor on Jul 15, 2007 18:27:06 GMT -5
She would have started undoing buttons but Charles came back in. "I don't want to intterupt..." He said slowly before sitting down.
"You weren't." Jerome said quickly. He tossed his news paper at Esme in boredom.
"Meanie."
"Shush....I don't want to hear anything until you wearing supper." Jerome laughed.
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Post by Jenny on Jul 22, 2007 14:04:43 GMT -5
Charles raised an eyebrow quizzically. Still angry, Esmé shrugged.
'Don't expect me to divulge everything to the maid.' she said. Charles laughed heartily.
'The maid!' he cried. 'Listen to you! I cleaned up the library, I think you ought to remember!'
She was puffing up to reply, but Jerome threw a cushion at Charles to break the tension. Esmé tried to stop herself from laughing, before her husband hit her with the otehr cushion.
'If you wanted a pillow fight--' she said in warning. Jerome instantly put his hands up in surrender.
'No.' he said quickly. 'I don't, I don't!'
'I do!' Charles cried, sensing a way to inflict war on the woman on the sofa. She practically threw herself across the room at him with a cushion and Jerome left to go help the food, which was no doubt burning now that Charles had left it.
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Post by Hanna Squalor on Jul 22, 2007 20:24:31 GMT -5
While Esme and charles swatted each other with pillows Jerome set the table. By the time the two huffing anf puffing pillow fighters came in for supper.
"Oh how useful you are, Jerome." Esme breathed. "Lets fire this useless pile of bones."
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Post by Jenny on Jul 27, 2007 8:02:33 GMT -5
'Useless pile of bones!' Charles cried, grabbing a chair to sit down. 'I do way more than you.' Of course this was true. Charles cleaned and cooked and worked hard for Jerome. Esmé...did relatively little. She went shopping a lot.
'Well, we employ you!' she snapped. 'And Jerome isn't married to you, either. I have an entirely different job description.'
Charles burst out laughing at that comment. 'Oh, yes, that's right. I just love the way you referred to being married as a job. And we wonder why you left.'
'You weren't even there!' Esme exploded. 'We didn't even know you!'
Jerome put his hand up from the other end of the table hesitantly like a child from school. 'May I interrupt.'
'By all means,' Chalres said.
'He wasn't asking you.'
'I think he was. And besides, your high=pitched wailing's getting to me now.'
Esmé puffed up. 'You're so--'
'Stop it!' Jerome cried. 'You're all wrong. Esmé, I've known Charles since we were children. He was one of the friends that boxed up some of your stuff and gave it to Natalie.'
'I just BET that was an exciting task.'
'She's insulting your family.' Charles interjected.
'No, I'm insulting his plain and boring cousin.'
Jerome ignored the comment, and Charles sulked afterwards.
'If I said that I'd be in loads of trouble, and you don't even get noticed for it.'
'You're the help. You can't expect to be able to insult him.'
'Yet his wife is permitted to.'
'Precisely. I'm glad you understand this concept.'
Jerome gave up after a while. He figured the two of them liked arguing. He knew Esmé wouldn't usually keep an argument going like this if it was real-- she was the type to argue for a minute, scream, throw something and then walk out, not to argue for ages about it with snide little digs at the other person. If that had been the case, much of the old china in his mothers collection would still have been intact.
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Post by Hanna Squalor on Jul 27, 2007 11:52:03 GMT -5
"I'm sick of this terrible fighting all the time. If you could keep your mouth shut like a good servant then maybe this wouldn't upset Jerome so much." Esme said, pushing her chair away from the table with enough force that it fell over. "I'm going to take a bath." she anouced, storming from the room and finding herself a calming mint green bathroom to use.
She filled the green tub with hot water and undressed. She was just climbing in when Jerome came in. "Hi you." She said, clearly wanting to be the one that Jerome favoured.
"Hi..." He said, he couldn't extactly be mad at her when she was naked.
She lowered herself into the tub slowly, breathing out as the hot water made contact with her skin.
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Post by Jenny on Jul 27, 2007 13:13:45 GMT -5
Jerome sighed. 'I'm sick of having to treat you two like a brother and sister that hate each other.'
Esme gagged. 'Just the thought of being related is disgusting.'
Jerome made a gesture with his hands and eyebrows simultaneously. 'Like that! I've never known you to be so immature.'
'Well, Charles should learn that we aren't in a three way marriage. He's the help, and all the help does is...help. Chrales's interfering does not count as helping.'
Jerome sighed. 'I don't want to dismiss Charles.'
Some bubbles flew into the air when she threw down her arm suddenly. 'But I hate him!' she cried. 'He wants you to hate me! If i walked off the edge of a cliff one day he'd be the first to celebrate. Followed by everyone else in the world that hates me.'
'Don't say that.'
'Why not? It's true. Nobody likes me anymore, apart from you.'
'...' Jerome smiled slightly. 'I keep telling you: read my book. It holds all the answers.'
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Post by Hanna Squalor on Aug 5, 2007 21:03:44 GMT -5
"Fine. I think I will." She announced.
"finally!" Jerome sighed. He had wanted her to forever.
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Post by Jenny on Aug 6, 2007 7:17:35 GMT -5
'You liked it when you read it the first time,' Jerome reasoned.
'Before I knew it was going to be used to blackmail me in years to come, yes.'
'Aww, don't start that again. Or I'll get Charles to shut you up.'
'I might poison him--and you--if you aren't careful.' she warned. 'Then I can have the place to myself.'
'Every reporter except Geraldine Julienne'd have a field day. She'd be stuck trying to explain ways in which you could possibly be innocent.'
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Post by Hanna Squalor on Aug 12, 2007 13:31:26 GMT -5
"Oh please. Do you thik I would actually get caught. Ha. I have years of experience. Posion was always my thing. Olaf's fires were a bit to obvious somtuimes. I always enjoys getting someone to trust me before I killed them."
"How morbid. You are scary you know that. That's why I don't trust you."
"I won't kill you. I don't know your new pin number," she laughed.
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Post by Jenny on Aug 12, 2007 13:39:04 GMT -5
He cupped his hand in the water and splashed her for that. She splittered, but didn't make to splash him back at any point.
'It's a wonder you didn't just dispose of me, then,' Jerome said quietly. 'If fires weren't a suitable way of doing it, you could have poisoned me, couldn't you? And never have had to worry about me again.'
She smiled. 'Could have. But then all your money would have gone to--'
She paused with her mouth open and turned to Jerome. He nodded. She just sat back, stunned.
'....Me.' she said quietly.
'That's right. You should have known I'd changed my will a few months after we married, when I remembered.'
She just sat there. 'You're damn lucky Olaf never thought of that. You wouldn't be here.'
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Post by Hanna Squalor on Aug 12, 2007 21:29:31 GMT -5
"Ha."
"Well he would have. I wouldn't have done it. I am oftly fond of you."
"How sweet." Jerome chuckled.
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Post by Jenny on Sept 16, 2007 13:23:14 GMT -5
She climbed out and quickly found four towels to sit in. She joined him again, sitting on the edge.
'Couldn't you hire someone else to clean up your house?' she begged him, pouting and trying not to get him wet when she leaned over his legs.
'Charles and I have been friends for quite a while,' he said uncertainly. 'And really, he has always been quite supportive of me.'
She rolled her eyes. 'If I read your book, all the way through, will you get rid of him?'
'No, sweetheart.' Jerome said softly, treating her like a child now for want of something better to say.
She sighed impatiently and crossed her arms. For the first time in her life, she hadn't won him over by batting her eyelashes.
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Post by Hanna Squalor on Sept 16, 2007 19:01:58 GMT -5
"Well...what if-"
"No."
"I didn't even say it yet."
"The answer is still no. I need him."
"For what?"
"He wears your clothes when you're not here. I'm just kidding!" He shouted at the end when she looked so alarmed.
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Post by Jenny on Sept 18, 2007 15:08:14 GMT -5
She pouted for a second and then scooted closer.
'Don't get me wet,' he squirmed away. She was so tempted to climb on him for that. but had more important things to say.
'No, honestly,' she said. 'What do you need him for? He cleans, yes. But we aren't that dreadful at keeping things tidy ourselves. And you could just hire another cleaner--' Yaki-thing was brought to mind, and she smiled softly. 'to do everything Charles does, but paid less and less intrusive.'
'I could do that, yes,' Jerome said. 'But I won't.'
'But why?' she wailed, impatient.
He stood. 'Charles and I are friends. He has given good advice over the past few years--'
She was shocked. '---What?' she cried. 'Like the advice he gives you about me? We all know that has been simply invaluable.'
Jerome averted his eyes, and handed her another towel. 'I'll have him make us all something else later,' he said, back to his usual clam voice. 'And perhaps we can talk? I know--'
'It's not damn likely.'
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