Post by cwm3 on Nov 9, 2003 5:33:22 GMT -5
Dear Reader,
This book is not suitable for any age due to the misery and shocks Violet, Klaus and Sunny Baudelaire experience in it.
Not one single thought comes to my mind when I wonder why on earth anybody would want to read a book involving a self-sustaining hot-air mobile home, some greenhouses, a liar using a false name, and the Venemous Terentula.
I have sworn to write down every last detail of these grim events, but you may swear instead to write down details of ponies and cake.
With all due respect,
Lemony Snicket
For Beatrice: Withstanding your death is to weep.
Chapter 1, Part 1
If, like me, you have ever been mistaken for a dangerous criminal, you will probably know what it is like to be on the run. If you haven't, then for your sake, I will now describe it.
Being on the run fills you with thrill, and terror, and woe all at once. The terror far outweighs the woe, however, which also far outweighs the thrill. And for Violet, Klaus and Sunny Baudelaire, the terror and woe far, far, far outweighed the thrill as their small boat was swept down the Stricken Stream.
"Look," said Klaus, after many hours of drifting pointlessly. I have heard many people say "Look," in my life, and it has nearly always resulted in tragedy. Before my good friend, Dr. Fellipell, was knocked off a cliff by a huge vulture, he said, "Look,". Before a woman I loved was swept away in the sea she managed just one word: "Look...".
But this is not a book about my experiences --- a word which here means 'dreadful days of doom and despair' --- so, I shall continue with a book about the Baudelaire orphans.
"Look," Klaus said, and Violet and Sunny looked.
"Yreneerg," Sunny cried. Like most other toddlers, Sunny Baudelaire had not quite mastered the English language, so was limited to minor words. Here, she was probably saying something like, "It's a greenhouse!"
"Look," Klaus said again, and as they looked, many, many more greenhouses started popping up over the hill.
This book is not suitable for any age due to the misery and shocks Violet, Klaus and Sunny Baudelaire experience in it.
Not one single thought comes to my mind when I wonder why on earth anybody would want to read a book involving a self-sustaining hot-air mobile home, some greenhouses, a liar using a false name, and the Venemous Terentula.
I have sworn to write down every last detail of these grim events, but you may swear instead to write down details of ponies and cake.
With all due respect,
Lemony Snicket
For Beatrice: Withstanding your death is to weep.
Chapter 1, Part 1
If, like me, you have ever been mistaken for a dangerous criminal, you will probably know what it is like to be on the run. If you haven't, then for your sake, I will now describe it.
Being on the run fills you with thrill, and terror, and woe all at once. The terror far outweighs the woe, however, which also far outweighs the thrill. And for Violet, Klaus and Sunny Baudelaire, the terror and woe far, far, far outweighed the thrill as their small boat was swept down the Stricken Stream.
"Look," said Klaus, after many hours of drifting pointlessly. I have heard many people say "Look," in my life, and it has nearly always resulted in tragedy. Before my good friend, Dr. Fellipell, was knocked off a cliff by a huge vulture, he said, "Look,". Before a woman I loved was swept away in the sea she managed just one word: "Look...".
But this is not a book about my experiences --- a word which here means 'dreadful days of doom and despair' --- so, I shall continue with a book about the Baudelaire orphans.
"Look," Klaus said, and Violet and Sunny looked.
"Yreneerg," Sunny cried. Like most other toddlers, Sunny Baudelaire had not quite mastered the English language, so was limited to minor words. Here, she was probably saying something like, "It's a greenhouse!"
"Look," Klaus said again, and as they looked, many, many more greenhouses started popping up over the hill.