Post by Sora on Jan 14, 2004 19:45:56 GMT -5
The Grim Grotto.
Dear Reader,
If you have read the utter foul words on the front of this book, then you still have a chance to save yourself from falling into a cavefull of misery and despair. Within the pages of this miserable volume in the Baudelaire’s lives, there are some grim and nauseating things that I won’t mention to you know. Well maybe I should tell you about the computer hacker, a moist stalactite, Count Olaf’s new comrade, the return of two friendly compadres, and ugly blue curtains. It is my determined quest to discover the trials and tribulations of the Baudelaire Orphans but you can spend your time doing something more palatable, like drinking parsley soda.
With all due Respect,
Lemony Snicket
Chapter 1
I am alone. I am utterly alone. My only true love is gone, my brother is gone, and my sister has disappeared. My only one true salvation is that I have a radio with me. Music is something magical. It can make feel as happy as a joker, or a sad as a kid whose dog has just been hit by a car. But for me, music is a way calm my mind and soul and almost make me forget that my darling Beatrice is no longer with me, and we are not doing the Tango at one of my acquaintances balls. Not only though, can music clear the mind, but also it can remove the mind of depression. Depression comes only once and a while, when one feels that nothing in the world can go right and everything can go wrong. The three Baudelaire’s were most definitely feeling the horrible feelings of depression. In the matter of a few months, the Baudelaire’s had been through so many depressing moments, that I could scarcely mention them all. Murder, arson, kidnapping, deceit, a fall down an empty elevator shaft, ran thousands of laps in a circle, almost being fed to starved lions, hypnotism, and recently the separation of a dear friend. The latter of the list of course was the one that was etched in the Baudelaire’s mind like stone.
“Violet!” Quigly had called as he was swept down the opposite tributary as the one the Baudelaire’s were on now.
“Quigly!” Violet had shrieked back as Quigly disappeared around the corner of the river. But it was no use. The only true friend the Baudelaires’ had at the moment now was gone. All of the Baudelaire’s hope was shattered. The Baudelaire’s were hopelessly depressed and there was nothing but the chirping that could salvage them. Violet the eldest Baudelaire lay down on one part of the toboggan that was serving as a fake raft. She was sobbing and sobbing but she new it was no use. Klaus, who at thirteen was the middle Baudelaire hung on loosely to the side of the raft, had tears in his eyes as well but you could not tell because they had smogged up his glasses. Nevertheless, Sunny was trying to smile and was saying comforting words to her siblings such as,
“Happy Happy” which meant something the lines of “Cheer Up!” Sunny was the Youngest Baudelaire and was almost 2 years old. Sunny, like most toddlers her age could not quite speak in whole sentences yet, but recently she had learned to say, I am not a baby, so the elder Baudelaires knew she was growing up.
But her attempts to brighten up her siblings were to no avail, simply because her heart wasn’t in what she was saying. She too was immensely sad by the departure of their friend, but was trying to appear brave. But when Sunny heard the sound of music nearby, she cried out in excitement.
“Do re Me Fe So La Te De!” she yelled, which meant something like, “Listen! There is music somewhere up ahead!” and she was indeed correct. Violet looked up in alarm. She too heard the music. But something about the voice surprised her. This voice was loud like a rockstar and had the voice of one too. Violet knew it could only be one person.
“SUMAC!”
Klaus finally looked up. Like his younger sister he could not understand what Violet was talking about. All they seemed to make out was a scratchy voice that annoyingly loud. Then Violet began to sing along,
“I love you like a turtle,
Loves the feel of its shell.
You make me feel like singing anywhere I feel.
You’re my number 1!
You’re the reason I live each day!
I love you baby,
You’re my number 1!
Klaus looked at his sister in amazement.
“You know that guy?” he asked
Violet was still snapping her fingers in time with the music.
“Yeah! He’s my favorite singer. I named that knot after him, Remember?”
“Oh yeah now I remember. You and your friend Jamie use to listen to his music all the time up in your room.”
Klaus and Sunny were not musically inclined. This just means that the two younger Baudelaires did not understand what the big deal was with this singer. In their opinion, the lyrics were terrible.
“I wonder where the music is coming from?” Violet asked, but I to her surprise the answer was right in front of her. On the side of one of the rocks in the water around the Baudelaires was a cave. Such caves as these are called grottos. But to the Baudelaires they were called:
Shelters.
Dear Reader,
If you have read the utter foul words on the front of this book, then you still have a chance to save yourself from falling into a cavefull of misery and despair. Within the pages of this miserable volume in the Baudelaire’s lives, there are some grim and nauseating things that I won’t mention to you know. Well maybe I should tell you about the computer hacker, a moist stalactite, Count Olaf’s new comrade, the return of two friendly compadres, and ugly blue curtains. It is my determined quest to discover the trials and tribulations of the Baudelaire Orphans but you can spend your time doing something more palatable, like drinking parsley soda.
With all due Respect,
Lemony Snicket
Chapter 1
I am alone. I am utterly alone. My only true love is gone, my brother is gone, and my sister has disappeared. My only one true salvation is that I have a radio with me. Music is something magical. It can make feel as happy as a joker, or a sad as a kid whose dog has just been hit by a car. But for me, music is a way calm my mind and soul and almost make me forget that my darling Beatrice is no longer with me, and we are not doing the Tango at one of my acquaintances balls. Not only though, can music clear the mind, but also it can remove the mind of depression. Depression comes only once and a while, when one feels that nothing in the world can go right and everything can go wrong. The three Baudelaire’s were most definitely feeling the horrible feelings of depression. In the matter of a few months, the Baudelaire’s had been through so many depressing moments, that I could scarcely mention them all. Murder, arson, kidnapping, deceit, a fall down an empty elevator shaft, ran thousands of laps in a circle, almost being fed to starved lions, hypnotism, and recently the separation of a dear friend. The latter of the list of course was the one that was etched in the Baudelaire’s mind like stone.
“Violet!” Quigly had called as he was swept down the opposite tributary as the one the Baudelaire’s were on now.
“Quigly!” Violet had shrieked back as Quigly disappeared around the corner of the river. But it was no use. The only true friend the Baudelaires’ had at the moment now was gone. All of the Baudelaire’s hope was shattered. The Baudelaire’s were hopelessly depressed and there was nothing but the chirping that could salvage them. Violet the eldest Baudelaire lay down on one part of the toboggan that was serving as a fake raft. She was sobbing and sobbing but she new it was no use. Klaus, who at thirteen was the middle Baudelaire hung on loosely to the side of the raft, had tears in his eyes as well but you could not tell because they had smogged up his glasses. Nevertheless, Sunny was trying to smile and was saying comforting words to her siblings such as,
“Happy Happy” which meant something the lines of “Cheer Up!” Sunny was the Youngest Baudelaire and was almost 2 years old. Sunny, like most toddlers her age could not quite speak in whole sentences yet, but recently she had learned to say, I am not a baby, so the elder Baudelaires knew she was growing up.
But her attempts to brighten up her siblings were to no avail, simply because her heart wasn’t in what she was saying. She too was immensely sad by the departure of their friend, but was trying to appear brave. But when Sunny heard the sound of music nearby, she cried out in excitement.
“Do re Me Fe So La Te De!” she yelled, which meant something like, “Listen! There is music somewhere up ahead!” and she was indeed correct. Violet looked up in alarm. She too heard the music. But something about the voice surprised her. This voice was loud like a rockstar and had the voice of one too. Violet knew it could only be one person.
“SUMAC!”
Klaus finally looked up. Like his younger sister he could not understand what Violet was talking about. All they seemed to make out was a scratchy voice that annoyingly loud. Then Violet began to sing along,
“I love you like a turtle,
Loves the feel of its shell.
You make me feel like singing anywhere I feel.
You’re my number 1!
You’re the reason I live each day!
I love you baby,
You’re my number 1!
Klaus looked at his sister in amazement.
“You know that guy?” he asked
Violet was still snapping her fingers in time with the music.
“Yeah! He’s my favorite singer. I named that knot after him, Remember?”
“Oh yeah now I remember. You and your friend Jamie use to listen to his music all the time up in your room.”
Klaus and Sunny were not musically inclined. This just means that the two younger Baudelaires did not understand what the big deal was with this singer. In their opinion, the lyrics were terrible.
“I wonder where the music is coming from?” Violet asked, but I to her surprise the answer was right in front of her. On the side of one of the rocks in the water around the Baudelaires was a cave. Such caves as these are called grottos. But to the Baudelaires they were called:
Shelters.