Post by Akbar Le Grey on Jul 30, 2006 4:37:37 GMT -5
July 30th – August 6th.
Editor-in-Chief: Akbar Le Grey.
Sub-editor: Linda*.
Columnists: Une femme auteur anonyme, Jemima, Sixteen*, Robert, J., Betsy, Snicket*.
Published by 667er Publications, ltd.
A subsidiary of the 667er Group.
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Shortly after Dupin’s return, his karma started to go down. From eighty it went at a fast rate and was soon into the negatives. Similar things started to happen to PJ and Akbar. In the thread “what the heck?”, Dupin asked who was doing this. No one admitted to this. PJ and Akbar also remarked about their waning karma. Yet the guilty party or parties remained unnamed. Dupin’s karma plunged all the way down to -40, even with the exalting of many members. PJ’s karma also suffered and grew smaller. Akbar’s karma was regained, going back to the fifties. Dupin had this to say about the situation:
“Aw, thanks guys. Who bets whoever did it doesn't admit it? They're probably sitting there, really happy, because they can smite someone over the internet” This comment irritated Kate, who then posted a sarcastic reply, as she felt Dupin was accusing her.
Even after days, no one admitted to repeated smiting. It became apparent that it was only one person, or at least per person. The smiting was done in large portions, in stead of spread out smiting which would come with a group.
It seems that those at fault have stopped and Dupin’s karma is now only at -1. It wasn’t the fact that they had less karma that seemed to bother these three members, but instead the fact that someone was smiting them.
Even though the smiting has stopped, their karma may never come back. This is because of a thread, made by Tragedy himself, asking the people of 667 whether they feel the karma system should stay or not. Here is a link to the thread. asoue.proboards11.com/index.cgi?board=fee&action=display&thread=1153856519
The people of 667 have two choices, stated in the thread. One is that we get rid of the karma system, and we forget this entire incident. The other is that we keep karma, an appropriate punishment is found, and the person at fault must make a public apology.
Late Wednesday, a thread was made.
(http://asoue.proboards11.com/index.cgi?board=jock&action=display&thread=1153881584) It was made by one known as sunshine111, saying that sunshine was sorry for smiting PJ, and me (I have been smited four times) Sunshine also said that there was no affiliation between him and the smiter of Akbar and Dupin. The 667er will keep you up to date on this topic as soon as more news comes.
-Descartes.
AKBAR LE GREY ADDS: On Saturday afternoon (GMT), Tess told this reporter that her karma has also gone down by 5 points recently.
Tragedy has locked the Karma thread, with the poll results till the time of locking being:
Option 1: 29 votes (41.4%)
Option 2: 41 votes (58.5%
Total Votes: 70.
Having done this, he started a new thread entitled ‘Recruiting’, where he stated, upon questioning, that he was looking for “a member who did not vote in the karma system poll, and who has no opinion and no bias on the matter, or a neutral outlook that does not lean either way.” Later, he suggested that applicants be good at debating, and then elaborated that he was not exactly looking for a good debater, but a potential mod/host for the karma debate, who must be unbiased.
Around midnight (GMT) on Saturday, the admin then changed his mind and said that he wanted ‘four extremely opinionated people. Two that support karma passionately, and two that strongly believe karma is a menace to 667. These people should also have some reasoning/debate experience.’
It is assumed that he wants to hold a debate on the karma issue, and we presume he will be the judge. So, the fate of karma seems to hang on whoever debates most passionately. An interesting idea, which sounds like something everyone can agree to.
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Betsy’s Rant.
I have some things that have been angering me. I’m going to rant about them for you.
First off, I just got some very upsetting news. Samreen’s title has disappeared. It was quite beautiful, stating she was a “Worshiper of the Almighty Betsy.” No one seems to know how this happened. I, personally, think this was a very tragic event. Not only does it deeply wound Samreen, but everyone who knows Samreen. “I just don’t know who would have done this to me!” Samreen half whispered, trying to hold back the tears, but erupting into sobs by the time she reached “to me.” Samreen’s close friend Luke confided in me, telling me that “[Samreen] just doesn’t have the same glowing beauty as she used to. I am deeply wounded.”
I have stupid summer reading. Not only do I have to read a book, but I have to read three. PLUS, they’re expecting me to take notes on them! I don’t want to do that. It’s suuummmerrr!!! I have to read A Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich by Alexander Solzhenitsyn, Balzac and the Little Chinese Seamstress by Dai Sijie, and The Plague by Albert Camus. I’ve read the forward/introduction thing for A Day in the Life and about two and a half pages of The Plague. It’s not going so well. Somehow, the whole enjoyment part of reading is destroyed when the back of your mind knows you’re being forced to read it and will later have to write several essays and have bazillions of deep, graded conversations on them. Samreen also has summer math, which is unfair and stupid and I would do it for her because I enjoy doing math but that would be considered cheating.
Last night I started a new menstruation cycle. For those of you not familiar with the pattern of this cycle, that means my uterine lining is shedding with extra blood through my cervix and dishwasher. This menses process is irritating and sometimes distracting. It just makes for so much extra work. Childbirth sounds painful and messy and I’m really afraid of it. I want to have kids, but the thought of morning sickness and backaches and contractions and the actual birthing and *shudder*! It’s scary. Stupid men.
I have a swim meet tomorrow and the stupid place it’s at doesn’t have starting blocks. How can you expect someone to have the momentum of a good start when they only have four inches of even gutter that’s less than an inch higher than the water?! I’ve been gone for two weeks and have swum twice in the two or so weeks that I’ve been back. It’s not like I went to practices very faithfully before my trips either. I am in no condition whatsoever for a meet. I’m actually quite nervous, considering that I found out that Joe is going to be in the meet to. And due to meet requirements, I have to wear a cap. I hatehatehateHATE swim caps; I never wear them unless situation requires, like tomorrow. ):
And finally, to finish this rant off, I have a stomachache.
-Betsy.
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THE CONTROVERSIES THAT WON'T DIE (VERY QUICKLY)
I fear that the whole matter of the board with random numbers in its title and "destruction" in its URL got out of control early this week. This all could have been avoided, perhaps, if Tragedy had simply told people who asked that he wasn't telling them stuff. Admittedly, I would have quite liked to know what that board was meant for, if anything. (Maybe it was an experiment to test how 667ers would react to a completely nonsensical addition to the forum.) Then again, I also want the passwords to the hidden sections, a new hat with a prettier veil, and a pony.
Furthermore, logan was involved in some arguing as well. His surrealistic epic "Smokey Tales" was rather nastily criticized by Orangey and our own review columnist. The whole thing was over with soon enough, but I'm still not sure if he's BSam, or someone pretending to be BSam, or BSam pretending to be someone different who occasionally pretends to be BSam. I should note that the apparently real BSam hasn't been logged on in some time, and has a very nice round number of posts.
Rather sadly, our older recent flamewar is still simmering occasionally. Dupin continues to object to MMisc's being filled with Plastic products, which is fairly understandable. Some of his opponents seem to think that copying and pasting rather paranoid posts-- while loudly disparaging the occasional "I agree" or "same as you" posts of others, which they also imitate-- is the height of satire. It seems the argument just won't die, with strikes and yelling thrown about. But another result of the same argument has been tidily undone-- Dupin has once again taken up his job as FFanwork moderator.
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ANNOUNCEMENT OF NON-QUITTING
For the benefit of my kind editor and those who actually read this, I should note that I'm not quitting, at least not without a compelling reason like terminal illness, a full-time job, or IP banning. The reason I mention this is that a few of my kind editor's loyal columnists have decided to write for another publication, part of which looks like it was copy-pasted from one of Akbar's first editorials(it was, I checked. Copying and pasting chunks of other people's writing seems to have become popular among certain members lately, but that doesn't mean it's particularly clever.) I understand Akbar was messing with people's submissions too much, but I haven't really had a problem with him editing my work-- he's quite tolerant of my opinions and even my occasional mocking of him.
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WHAT GOES AROUND EVENTUALLY COMES AROUND
Yes, such is the law of karma. As I believe I noted last week, some people here were rather concerned about the rapid decline in their karma, and evidently Tragedy was concerned about their concern. So the forum was presented with a choice between getting rid of the karma system entirely, and merely solving the problem of who's been doing these particular acts of repeated smiting-- which look like they've mostly let up or been neatly counteracted by well-wishers, anyway.(A mysterious fellow named Potato Man seemed to be attempting the latter. He's almost certainly some older, troublesome member trying to redeem himself.) Quite some fuss was made about how much of a fuss people are making about the karma system, which is perhaps a good reason to get rid of it. If done, that will hopefully do away with both the fuss and the, um, meta-fuss.
In the midst of things, someone named Sunshine111 came forth and confessed to smiting PJ repeatedly(claiming the simultaneous smitings of others to be mere coincidence done by... some other grudge-holding lurker with multiple accounts, I suppose). If we had no karma system, I'd surely be writing about this informed newcomer and his/her random criticisms of PJ, which I would admittedly find more interesting.
Having been voting-locked, the karma poll remains quite close to the percentage Tragedy wanted to make a firm decision, the preferred choice being revealing the identities of the phantom smiters. However, Tragedy made cryptic comments about a "Plan B" to be brought out, which turned out to involve locating a member with no bias one way or the other on the karma system. Having been voting-locked, the karma poll remains quite close to the percentage Tragedy wanted to make a firm decision, the preferred choice being revealing the identities of the phantom smiters. However, Tragedy made cryptic comments about a "Plan B" to be brought out, which turned out to involve locating a member with no bias one way or the other on the karma system, and some amount of debating. Admittedly, I've found karma mildly entertaining-- less so than the more open arguments we'd have without it, but it's caused some interesting arguing nonetheless.
- Une femme auteur anonyme.
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So the 667er is awesome, right? SO WHY DID YOU ALL SWITCH TO THE 668ER? You didn't, you say? We're still loyal, you say? Put the guy down and walk away slowly, you say? That's damn right. The 667er's a great paper, Akbar's a great man/boy/it, and we all love him, so show some appreciation. The 668er was funny, I admit, but come on, was it really necessary to make almost EVERY ARTICLE about how much Akbar sucked? Seriously, he doesn't do that much editing. It's not that big of a deal. [Ed’s Note: I <3 Robert for doing this, but I didn’t tell him to. So there]
Personally, if I ran a newspaper, I'd be a dictator. I'd make you all turn in your articles six weeks beforehand, and if you didn't, I'd whip you and I'd laugh. I would go as far as to say that I would laugh heartily. Maybe even... I don't know, something more extreme than heartily. Did I mention I'd whip you? Because I've kind of always wanted to whip somebody.
That reminds me. One time, my brother got out his six-foot bullwhip, and he whipped me in the testicles. That doesn't come up much in normal conversation, because if I say it, most people are left thinking, "Wow. Robert certainly has a dysfunctional family," and I don't like people thinking that because really, my family isn't that bad. Well, my dad was a thief and a druggie, my mom used to be a monkey, my stepdad's... well, he's black, but we won't go into racial slurs here, that's not what we're about at the 667er. We're all about fried chicken because I'll be damned if it isn't delicious.
And no, that wasn't supposed to be a play off of the fact that my stepdad is black, and yes, you are racist for thinking of it.
I really have no idea what this article is supposed to be about, but me, Akbar, Jemima, J, and George had a meeting and we decided that the 667er needed fresh, new, funny material, so naturally, we chose fresh, funny members, and of course, I came to mind. Everyone's mind. I swear, I didn't bribe them with candy to make them let me write an article.
I think I'm supposed to be funny here or something. I don't really know, like I said. I mean, WHAT? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? GEE ROBERT'S ARTICLE SURE WAS HILARIOUS, YUP YUP. D:
So, in conclusion, it's 3:16 in the morning, and I'm tired. I hate most of you, and, as you know, I hope you choke. Especially Snicket.*
*I'm just kidding, Snicket. I don't hope you choke.**
**Yes I do.
-Robert.
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I’m really upset with all the drama going on in 667 recently. Now, I love drama as much as the next person, but there’s just been too much at one time. Too much drama causes stomach aches, heart attacks, vomiting, diarrhea, and Degrassi episodes. And no one wants more Degrassi episodes. Issue after issue sort of waters down the impact of each issue. You can’t have all the forum fighting each other over a clique if most of us are busy fighting the administration, can you? And that brings us to tonight’s word: Attack.
I’m going to give everyone some advice so everyone is capable of brewing up a bit of forum controversy. You don’t need to be well-known. Hell, you can even be a newbie. If you’re a newbie, you’ve got it made. Come onto this site and yell. Complain about the threads. With all your worldly knowledge of one post, say that 667 has gone down hill and place the blame on some popular 667ers. I’ll give you some names—me, for one. You can look at post count or karma to decide who’s a good target. And when you get all the forum against you, don’t back down. Curse, cry, kick, scream and yell until you’re banned. And then come back and do it again.
If you have a beef with another 667er and another fight’s going on already, just bottle it up for a few weeks. Dramatic issues on 667 are usually resolved within a few days, and then give us some recoup time. You’re only bottling emotions, and that’s a very healthy thing to do. And passionate rages get better with age.
If the board has undergone a drama draught, be a drama queen and make up lies. Exagerate each issue. DO NOT LET THINGS DIE. Instigate, instigate, instigate! Leave the board if your karma goes down even one point! Post an article in the 667er about someone who has wronged you. Be generous and give names and details. Say that Tragedy molested you.
Always think of the administration as a huge, powerful, cold, heartless, evil machine out to silence you and destroy your rights. And the best thing you can do for society is rebel. And you never know who’s working for the machine, so attack everyone. Don’t apologize. Don’t compromise. Attack. And that’s the word.
-J.
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Interview Of The Week.[/u]
This week we interviewed Tess, who graciously filled in when Betsy was unavailable. Some of the questions below are courtesy of PJ, who was also kind enough to help.
The 667er: Welcome, Tess. Thank you for joining us.
Tess: Thanks for having me, 667er.
The 667er: How long have you been a member of 667?
Tess: Since December 5, 2005.
The 667er: Good memory, considering you deleted your account. Have you ever been bitten by Gretchen, your e-sister, thus becoming a zombie?
Tess: No, I'm the nice, evil twin. I mean, nice, alive twin. Oops.
The 667er: Haha. Do you believe in magic?
Tess: Yes, I do.
The 667er: In a young girl's heart? How the music can free her whenever it starts?
Tess: Haha, actually, yea.
The 667er: Moving on...If there’s nothing out there, then what was that noise?
Tess: *hushed voice* we'll contact you later...
The 667er: Dun dun dun! How is Bermuda? Do you miss your own home?
Tess: Bermuda is fabulous, simply marvelous. I miss my mom and sister and cat and mom's boyfriend, so I'm ready to go back, but I've had a marvelous time.
The 667er: That's swell. When are you coming back?
Tess: Tomorrow. Although, it'll be later today when this is posted.
The 667er: What is the strangest, wackiest thing you’ve ever done?
Tess: Um, let me think. Man, there's so many to choose from! Probably distracting a ref in a flag football game to say hi because I hadn't seen him in awhile even though he was probably happy I moved. He waved back, though. I was happy. But there are so many more choices.
The 667er: That sounds like an awful lot of fun. If you could switch places with anyone in the world, who would it be?
Tess: Either Emma Watson because she gets to be close to Daniel Radcliffe, or whoever plays Moaning Myrtle for the same reasons. (:
The 667er: D: If you could have tea with one member of 667, who would it be?
Tess: Um, Gigi, if she has tea. She's a cool member, a friend of mine, and just seems like a grand tea companion.
The 667er: Mm, I love Gigi. Suppose PJ invented a time machine. What time would you go to, and would you then consider unblocking him on MSN?
Tess: I would go back to the discovery of Jupiter, because that would have been great because it's my favorite planet, if the thing worked. As for the second question, depends on how well the contraption works.
The 667er: Who's your favorite 667er? Who's your least favorite? What do you like least about your favorite, and most about your least favorite?
Tess: Samreen is my favorite (sorry to everyone else! I <3 you all! *diplomat*) and, not to stir up old conflicts, but I don't really like Ann. Samreen's trouble is she's hardly ever online, and Ann is an interesting person if you are interested in the topic of the moment
The 667er: Interesting. Jemmy met up with Samreen today, you know. That's pretty darn cool. Do you like the accordion?
Tess: I heard! They're giving each other hugs from me. Um, I can't play the accordion, but my favorite song has to be "Leeches" for obvious reasons. I suppose it's enjoyable.
The 667er: Heh, they must be giving each other lots of hugs, because they're giving each other hugs for me, too. What’s your favorite book?
Tess: Oh, so many! Maniac Magee, HBP, anything by Chis Paolini, etc. MMagee had a strange effect on me. I physically couldn't put it down, my brain wouldn't allow me to.
The 667er: Yay for hypnosis! Why are you called twistedbrain, anyway? Some special story, or did you just think it sounded "hip”?
Tess: Um, it was originally from my old website that I don't tend to anymore, but it just fits, doesn't it, for an ex-OCD perfectionist suffering from anxiety?
The 667er: Nah, I think you're really normal. In the weird kind of way. Is there anything else you’d like to say to the general public of 667?
Tess: Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak! That is all. Thanks for interviewing me.
The 667er: Thank you for being with us! Join us next week when we interview Jemmy. Or Betsy, if she ever comes online.
-Libitina.
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