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Post by raoawr on Jan 29, 2008 20:36:40 GMT -5
Is chihuahua called maya?
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Post by Zavi on Jan 29, 2008 20:46:27 GMT -5
I'm so deranged. XP
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Post by Deleted on Jan 29, 2008 22:43:06 GMT -5
In a dimly lit room in the basement, Charlotte sat under a single lamp. Snicket stood in front of her with his arms crossed. Cybermystery looked at Snicket, then crossed his arms too. Snicket was wearing the policeman uniform he found in the costume box. Cybermystery, disappointed Snicket took the best costume, was stuck with the cowboy outfit. Snicket started the interrogation with, “You’re probably wondering why we brought you here, Charlotte. We just need to ask you a few questions. First, what are you doing here?” “Oh my god, I can’t even believe what Hannah did yesterday at the birthday party. It was INSANE. I would have never said what she said, but I guess I can’t blame her” Charlotte babbled. “THIS IS SERIOUS BUSINESS” snapped Snicket. “WHERE ARE YOU LOYALTIES.” “Tonight for dinner I had beef stroganoff, Caesar salad, some grapes, two breadsticks and and lemon bar.” “Oh, I made those lemon bars. How were they?” inquired Cybermystery, genuinely curious. “SHUT UP. This isn’t chit chat time, junior. I have a job to do and you’re slowing me down.” All of a sudden Sora entered the room, dressed up as a construction worker. “Hey guys, can I play too?” “DID YOU NOT SEE THE SIGN THAT SAID ‘QUIET PLEASE INVESTIGATION IN PROCESS’” Snicket screamed. Sixteen and Brownie walked in, dressed as an Indian and a Biker. “WHAT IS GOING ON HERE” Willis and Pandora walked by, and peeked into the room. “Look Willis, you can finally see the Village People.” Delighted by this comparison, Sixteen, Brownie and Sora all began doing the YMCA dance. Cybermystery looked over at Snicket to judge his reaction, but after a while started dancing too, unable to help himself. He flipped on the disco ball, and all of them, including Willis, Pandora and Charlotte, start dancing. Snicket got extremely frustrated and yelled “You amateurs. I will get my revenge.” The ultimate Frisbee tournament only had two teams enter, so it was a bit of a disappointment. Tragedy named the prize as a point in the VFDoor contest given to the captain of each team. Team one’s was Gigi, armed with her walker. She just grabbed the people who were standing close by, so her teammates were Embah, Wheelchair bound Leslie, and Countolaf. The other team was Kyle and his dog Maya. Libitina and St emo were watching in the crowd. “Cheers, dearies. I do love a good game of football here at the pitch. Don’t you, love?” St emo stared at her, wondering why she she was speaking with an accent when she clearly wasn’t British. On the playing field, the game was pretty ugly. 667 is completely lacking in athletic ability, so there was a lot of dropped passes, a lot of horrible throws, and a lot of just standing around not doing anything. On one play, Leslie rolled deep down the field, but the Frisbee hit her chair and she fell over and flooped around on the ground. The only scoring play was when Kyle tossed it to the endzone and Maya made an incredible backflip while catching it. After receiving the point, Maya donated it to the team squad because they have been wronged in the past. Yusuke, Rellim and Willis’ brother, was sent by their mother to check up on how the party was going. He was so excited to meet all the people his siblings had told him about. He went around, eating plateful after plateful yet never quite getting full. Soon, he saw a tv with video games on it and became enamored. He quickly jumped over the couch and sat down. What he didn’t notice was Robert was lying on that couch, playing against eggman. He sat on Robert’s head, which caused Robert to scream a few obscenities at him. “I am very very sorry.” Yusuke pleaded, but Robert wouldn’t have it. “Eggman, grab him while I get ready.” Eggman grabbed Yusuke and pinned him down. But Yusuke had played too much super smash bros to let that be an issue. He curled up in a ball and rolled out of his grip. Then he doubled jumped over eggmans head and did a diving kick, knocking him out. Robert was shocked, but ready for a fight. The two of them squared off, circling around waiting for the other to make a move. Robert was the first to bite, when he made a slight lunge at Yusuke. Yusuke did a backflip, then powered up with a falcon punch, knocking Robert to the ground. He was singing “Rinda Rinda” at the top of his lungs the entire time. Freshie ran over distressed, and expressed her love for Robert. Robert got up, shaken and severely injured, and brushed past her. Crushed, Freshie said “semicolon dash semicolon” and cried. Eggman regained consciousness, and saw Freshie crying. At that moment, he realized he had fallen in love. He grabbed his rainbow hankerchief, and dried her tears. At that moment, she realized she had fallen in love as well. They looked at each other with the same thought in their mind, and then walked hand in hand to the closet. They opened it up, walking in on Jacques and Snicketfires.
Zaid and Elizabeth’s awkward dinner was still going on, switching back and forth almost nonstop. It was Elizabeth who committed the crime of accidently showing up at Zaid’s table while still wearing the disguise. This was the last straw for Zaid. He loudly exclaimed “I am sick of this, I am leaving. I won’t tell you why I’m leaving, but just know that I am. Please give me attention by sending me PMs and writing a lot in my thread. After all, the only reason I’m leaving is to get all these compliments and to seem mysterious.” With that, he stormed out. Deanna and Hanna Squalor, who were sitting at the table behind them, looked completely confused. Elizabeth sighed, then continued eating her frozen yumyum.
During a particularly busy part of the evening, Jemima realized she hadn’t seen Samreen yet. She started asking around, yet nobody had seen her. She searched nearly every room of every floor of the building with no luck. “How could she not come” Jemima thought. “We had such a special bond when we met before.” She finally went to the lobby, the last room she hadn’t checked. Tragedy and Fancy were sitting together on the couch, Tragedy making pathetic attempts to wink at her. Dante was curled up in a ball fast asleep, exhausted after having read No more Monkeys Jumping on the bed. Swans was sitting in the corner, maniacally laughing as if she were some sort of witch. Suddenly, there was a shadow in the window. “BATMAN” yelled swans. “Please you crazy magee. That is not batman” said Tragedy calmly. But the crazy magee was right for once, because Batman was standing at the window. Except it was a girl with a gun. Also, that girl was Samreen, and she was just dressed as Batman. Samreen cocked her shotgun, aimed it straight at Tragedy and fired. Fortunately for Tragedy, Samreen was awful with a gun and shot Dante in the head instead. Antenora walked in and stiffly nodded her head down, a huge outpour of emotion for her. Trying again, she fires away, this time hitting Antenora. She falls on her stuffed lion, her facial expression never changing. Swans, crazy as ever, pulls out a plastic lightsaber and swings away. Samreen points at swan and finally has good aim, as the blast knocks her back to the wall. CCV and pig started dancing around her body, singing “Ding dong with witch is dead” in their high pitched voices. Samreen aimed back at Tragedy and took three shots. Inexplicably, she ended up shooting CCV, pig and CCV’s hamster despite the fact that they were directly behind her. With the last shot, she fires and hits Jemima in the knee. Jemima falls to the ground in agony, and Samreen realizes what a mistake all of this was. She goes over and hugs Samreen, vowing to never kill again. As for the reason Samreen was trying to kill Tragedy in the first place, that secret remains unknown to this day.
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Post by s on Jan 30, 2008 1:19:46 GMT -5
Why does Samreen get such a fantastic role? This is good. Write more.
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Post by Shelly on Jan 30, 2008 9:12:29 GMT -5
BATMAN. Nananananananana - BATMAN.
The male Angel of Vengeance. I prefer the Angel, but Batman's okay.
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Post by Sixteen on Jan 30, 2008 12:41:17 GMT -5
Snicket and Cybermystery should have their own sitcom.
I'm looking forward to the next part.
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Post by Charles Vane on Jan 30, 2008 18:24:01 GMT -5
Is chihuahua called maya? Yes. Village People!
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Post by Rellim on Jan 31, 2008 1:39:43 GMT -5
FROZEN YUMYUM!!!!!!!
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Post by Saint Emo O_o on Jan 31, 2008 2:24:02 GMT -5
"Listen, pipsqueak. This isn't the peewees anymore. You're way out of your league" Snicket said nasally. "And by the way, a cactus? The pros all use ficus trees." XD Pure gold.
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Post by samreen on Jan 31, 2008 15:40:16 GMT -5
BATMAN!!!
Brilliant.
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Post by Linda Rhaldeen on Jan 31, 2008 16:48:11 GMT -5
Betsy, can I have some of your frozen yumyum? It sounds really good.
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Post by Charles Vane on Jan 31, 2008 20:43:57 GMT -5
More.
And I'm sad Yusuke and i didn't meet in the story. But I guess its okay since we've met many times in real life.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 1, 2008 0:12:19 GMT -5
Shocked, Cybermystery and Snicket watched as they saw the proof. Charlotte was the most loyal member in 667 history, even more than the two of them. The pool party was just beginning, and Charlotte was in her bikini. This allowed them to see something she had been hiding the entire night. On her stomach was a tattoo of Tragedy’s face. This completely raised the stakes on her loyalty. Cybermystery was satisfied, turning to Snicket and saying “Well, I guess she is loyal. How about that? Can I be the one who tells Tragedy?” Snicket shook his head and sighed. “Pipsqueak, you still have a lot to learn. We can’t just tell him about how loyal she is. Not only will it make us look like we didn’t do a great job, but it will show that I might not be his most loyal slave. We’re telling him that she is planning conspiracy and she is a moderator at ue.”
Skalu was sitting in the lobby, holding his video camera with a giant grin on his face. A walked in, and said “Hey, I saw you recording all night. Why were you doing that?” Nervous, Skalu came up with “Well, uh, Tragedy wanted me to make a video of the night so I did. That sounds realistic, right.” “Well, let me see what you’ve got.” Skalu became extremely defensive, hugging the camera tight up against his chest. “You can’t. It has to be a secret.” But Skalu was a little wimp and A easily pried the camera from his hands. She hooks it up to the projecter so that everybody can watch it. First was a shot of Pandora playing billiards. Then there was a shot of Pandora watching TV. Then there was a shot of Pandora flirting with Yusuke with sounds of Skalu’s weeping in the background. Everybody in the room was laughing, pointing and shaking their heads. Skalu took out his wallet filled with Pandora snapshots to make himself feel better. Edwin walks by, calls Skalu a creep, and then knocks the wallet to the ground.
Katekor brought her fiancée along, and everybody was so excited to meet him. They did everything together. Since they were some of the last to arrive, they got bombarded with questions by nearly everybody. It took them ages to get into a quiet room to have a nice chat. The two of them were sitting in the TV room with Dear Dairy and Linda. They were harmlessly making small talk, when Linda asked “So do you guys have a date for the wedding yet.” Katekor shook her head, saying “We’ve been meaning to set one, but we’re always so busy these days. At this rate, we’ll never get married!” Linda chuckled, then jokingly said “Maybe you guys should just get married here.” Katekor and Fiancee laughed. Then Katekor said “I know it was a joke, but we are extremely busy. If there was actually somebody ordained here, I would have to consider it.” Dear Dairy’s eyes lit up. “You know, I became ordained as a minister in 1916 due the shortage the war brought. I suppose I could do it.” Katekor and Fiancee looked at each other, questioning whether or not this was the right thing to do. But in the end, they decided to go for it. They were so in love they wanted to be married as soon as possible, and if they had time later they would have a huge ceremony for their families. And so the party had had turned into a wedding. They all moved to the famous and absolutely real UW-L chapel. The entire party came to watch this historic event. Dear Dairy stands at front of the church with Fiancee and his best man, Best Man. Katekor is standing in the back of the church in the wedding dress she got from the costume box. She tried to get Fiancee to wear the tuxedo, but he insisted on the pirate costume instead. As the music started, Gigi walked Katekor down the aisle. There was not a dry eye in the house as Dear Dairy started the ceremony. It was a beautiful ceremony up until the point where Dear Dairy asked if anybody had any reason these two should not wed. Amanda stood up, and announced “I do not believe in heterosexual marriage. It is offensive to me.” The room is completely silent, until Chocolate Thunda stands up. “Amanda, I love you. Will you marry me?” Amanda was taken aback, but was obviously still smitten with Chocolate Thunda. She hesitated for a moment, and then screamed out “Yes!” The wedding became a double wedding. Fiancee and Katekor went first, then the lesbians. All the members of 667 who weren’t previously killed started throwing rice in the air, celebrating this happy occasion. Unfortunately, it was the last moment this party would have, because Willis’s hall director Ryan came back, distressed by the mess and screamed “I said you could have 6 people over, not the whole state!” Everybody fled after that, fearing Ryan’s wrath.
Linda was in the lobby, dressed in her janitor outfit as she cleaned up the empty cups, paper plates, food crumbs and dead bodies. Up in Willis’ room, Pandora, Charlotte, Kyle, Tragedy, Rellim and Fancy were all hanging out with Willis for the kickass after party. Tragedy made fun of the team squad despite the fact that they were dominating him in DDR. Rellim got up to go to the bathroom, and Fancy got up to go with her. They stared deeply and intensely into each other’s eyes, and then walked out together holding hands. After the two returned with guilty smiles, Willis realized what an awesome party he had just thrown. He looked around the room at his friends, and then proposed a toast. “This is to all of 667. This is to the cool people in this room, but also to everybody else. This is to the babies, the gags, the janitors, the mageees, the noobs, the paraplegics, the asexuals and the furries. This is to everybody who witnessed the greatness of the team squad. This is to friends, enemies, acquaintances, associates, and wastrels.” They clinked their glasses and laughed. That’s when Kyle read the traditional Kwanzaa story and they all discovered the true spirit of Kwanzaa. It was truly amazing.
Acknowledgements
To my bro Tragedy, who was my inspiration for this story. You’re my bro forever. To my sister Elizabeth, who I love and will miss so badly. To my team squad Pandora, Kyle and Charlotte, who made this place fun by being awesome. I would have left for good ages ago if it weren’t for you three. To Linda, Shruti, swans, Fancy, Samreen and Pj, for being people I like but don’t know as well as my team squad. And to my number one fan Dante. You finally get your wish, because I’m gone. Grow up and learn to have fun. That’s what life is all about.
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Post by Linda Rhaldeen on Feb 1, 2008 1:51:48 GMT -5
Oh. My. Goodness. YOU REMEMBERED THE SECRET JANITOR CLUB! I love you.
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Post by Triangle Eyes on Feb 1, 2008 14:21:27 GMT -5
"the paraplegics"
I am so happy that I got a special mention.
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