|
Post by Hermes on Jul 12, 2009 9:54:57 GMT -5
Brilliant. I particularly liked the bit about Trillis's bolts of lightning.
|
|
|
Post by katekor on Jul 12, 2009 12:05:08 GMT -5
Yes yes yes
|
|
|
Post by Mijahu on Jul 13, 2009 14:37:16 GMT -5
So good.
|
|
|
Post by Linda Rhaldeen on Jul 13, 2009 21:34:23 GMT -5
This is intense.
|
|
|
Post by Hermedy on Jul 14, 2009 2:39:27 GMT -5
I always knew Leslie is hot.
|
|
|
Post by Libitina on Jul 16, 2009 11:57:24 GMT -5
Chapter 4: Blarlotte spat out the Swiss cake roll she was eating the way people spit out coffee on TV when they hear something really alarming. It didn’t have the same effect because Wijahu was sitting right beside her and got an earful of chocolate. “But what can she do? You don’t think she really has something against Asians, do you?” Blarlotte said.
“She tried to poison us,” Filan said. “And all those pictures…this must be the reason she’s taken over. You know as well as the rest of us how much she loves Larack Brobama.” The housemates were silent.
“What can we do?” Clixteen asked. “We’ve got to protect you two.” But no one had an answer.
“Sucks to be you,” said BWam, cracking open another beer. Above them in the air conditioning vent, someone was listening with perverse pleasure. He shook with silent giggling, but he squirmed to violently and the vent boomed, betraying him.
“What was that?” asked Trillis. The man in the vent knew now that he had no time to lose. He was dressed all in black and had a paper bag over his head with a pretty face drawn in Sharpie, so he could proceed well-concealed. He smashed through the vent with his steel-toe boot and leapt like a cat through the hole. Grabbing Tinabiania by the throat, he gave a war cry and ran out the door, catching the next train to Washington D.C.
“WTF,” said BWam, “she’s not even Asian.”
“But she loves Asians,” Wijahu pointed out. “Wiangle must already have spies dispersed around the country. And Asians are her target.”
Blarlotte wailed. “But I’m so pretty,” she said.
“I’ll say,” said Filan. However, he was quite distressed because he had just gotten in a fight with Tinabiania about how he wanted to sleep with her but she wanted to get married first, but he figured he would just divorce her once they got married and he slept with her. Now he was going through an intense conversion in which he was no longer a manmonkey (lolyeahright). “We have to save Angrytina,” he said.
“Who?” BWam asked.
“I mean Tinabiania,” Filan said. With that, he packed the housemates into his van and set off for the nation’s capital.
Meanwhile, Wiangle Fries was sitting on her throne in the White House, stroking a white cat that sat in her lap. She absently rolled her wheelchair back and forth. Right on time, the door opened and let a wedge of light into the darkened room. The man with the paper bag over his head stepped forward. He carried an unconscious Tinabiania in his arms.
“Excellent, you’ve knocked her out,” Wiangle said.
“No, I was just talking to her during the train ride and she fell asleep,” the man said.
“Alright, put a sock in it. To the dungeons with the girl. And how is our progress elsewhere?”
“Excellent. The other say they should be arriving shortly.”
Wiangle Fries smiled. “The Asiocaust has begun," she said fiendishly, and broke into maniacal laughter.
|
|
|
Post by Linda Rhaldeen on Jul 19, 2009 18:17:51 GMT -5
Oh no!
|
|
|
Post by Triangle Eyes on Jul 20, 2009 14:58:11 GMT -5
But I like Asians.
|
|
|
Post by Libitina on Jul 21, 2009 17:12:23 GMT -5
Okay, then it's a good thing the character of Wiangle Fries is not based on you.
|
|
|
Post by Sixteen on Jul 23, 2009 6:48:20 GMT -5
I can't get enough of this. Please write more soon.
|
|
|
Post by Libitina on Jul 26, 2009 22:07:27 GMT -5
Chapter 5 The van pulled up to a curb a few streets away from the White House. It was midnight. A mysterious, ill-fitted silence hung in the air in Washington; every move seemed tentative, afraid of the consequences of any slight change. The housemates piled out of the van, followed close behind by Weedjahu’s marijuana smoke. Filan coughed violently. “Lay off that stuff, would you, Wijahu?” he said.
Trillis laughed. “As if, bro. You make it seem like you’ve never done it before.”
“I haven’t,” Filan said.
“Guys, we’ll have to be more quiet than this,” Clixteen warned them, so they hushed. The group of them hurried along until they reached a street corner. Standing there against a building was a heavily makeuped woman in her twenties wearing fishnet tights, a miniskirt, and a tube top.
“Hullo, hussy,” BWam said. She drew her arm across his shoulders and licked his ear. Filan’s eyes nearly popped out of his head.
“Not today, sorry,” Blarlotte said, pushing him along. The ragamuffin crew continued along the road. The walk to the White House was a short one, especially at this time of night and when most people stayed inside due to the frightful condition of the government. They walked with steadfast determination.
The city had been much changed even in the short period since Wiangle had forcibly taken office. Her face was plastered on posters on every telephone pole, and every wheelchair parking space sign had a smiley face sticker on it. Children dared not go into the street. Doors were locked and windows boarded. The silence with which the housemates walked was filled with an eerie uneasiness. They reached a corner and encountered another prostitute with her back to them.
“Sweet, my turn!” Filan cried. She turned around. Her face was hideously done up in powdery white makeup and red paint that looked like blood. Her teeth, more like fangs than anything, gleamed despite the darkness.
“Filan, I’ve been waiting for you,” she said, and she wrapped her arm around his neck, fleeing off to the White House with him in tow. The housemates watched, too stunned to move.
“That downright sucks,” BWam said.
“We’re so close now, we’ve got to keep going and save them both!” Trillis cried. “For the bros!”
“For the bros!” Clixteen echoed. Blarlotte and BWam stood beside them awkwardly because they weren’t bros, but the idea was the same.
|
|
|
Post by Deleted on Jul 26, 2009 22:13:01 GMT -5
for the bros
|
|
|
Post by Hermedy on Jul 26, 2009 22:48:05 GMT -5
for the hos
|
|
|
Post by Shelly on Jul 27, 2009 1:18:08 GMT -5
for the VAMPIRES.
|
|
|
Post by katekor on Aug 7, 2009 10:09:42 GMT -5
More please!
|
|