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Post by Hermes on Jun 22, 2012 16:15:59 GMT -5
Ooh.
You win for weirdness, I think.
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Post by B. on Jun 22, 2012 16:23:46 GMT -5
Why thank-you, Hermes. Are Friday and Klaus your ASoUE otp, then?
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Post by Hermes on Jun 22, 2012 16:28:35 GMT -5
In a way I guess they are - though I think he could have been happy with Fiona, had she not been lost. (But I do think the Great Unknown is final.)
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Post by Christmas Chief on Jun 22, 2012 16:39:38 GMT -5
Call Me Mamael. By Sherry Ann [Ishmael/Maya]
“Maya,” Ishmael breathed, looking intently into her eyes. She had the roundest, most beautiful eyes. “Maya, you can’t tell the others, but – I - I love you, Maya. You’ve always been my favorite, my most cherished.” He stroked her head. She looked away, not sure what to think. “I love you. Can’t you understand?” He dropped his hand in frustration. “I can’t go a day without thinking about you. Not one day!” Maya turned her head toward the ground, then to the night sky. With a blank glance toward Ishmael, she limped away to munch on the island’s limited supply of grass.
Ishmael gave an exasperated huff. Not one of his sheep ever seemed to return his undying affection. It was only made worse when he had to hide it. Day after day, stupid, drugged castaways would show up at his tent demanding advice. He would feign concern. He would suggest a solution. He would pretend his mind wasn’t with Maya, in the arboretum, stroking her coarse, even wool …
Alas, fate was against them. Every night he sneaked out of his tent, journeyed to the arboretum, and watched the sheep crowd against the farthest wall at his arrival. All except one.
Maya had a limp leg, and could not join the others at their hiding place. Ishmael took this as a sign. He knew they were meant to be. According to the leather book detailing all the exploits of V.F.D., Maya was hurt in a lumber mill accident pulling green wood to the sites of wealthy families. She and the other injured had been set to be transported to the nearest veterinarian, who happened to be a sea away, but was caught in a storm with one of the islanders and wound up on Ishmael’s shores. The others healed, but Maya stayed blessedly crippled.
He dreamed of her. He knew it was unnatural, but something compelled him to pursue her. If only they knew clay feet were just the beginning. No one could know his secret.
The following pages were recovered from A Series of Unfortunate Events:
May 6, 19XX
As I suspected, I am to suffer once more. The others believe that our love is strange and dangerous, and so these odd feelings are too normal for me. I plan to take my love on a boat M has built and named after me. I am heartbroken, but I have been heartbroken before, and this might be the best for which we can hope. We cannot truly have normal children, here or anywhere else, and so it might be best for us and maybe even a baby to immerse ourselves in the world. By the way, if it is a girl we will name her Ishya, and if it is a boy we will name him Mamael.
June 4, 19XX
Not much time to write. The opportunity I wrote of last month has arisen – the Baudelaires (see page 161) have wreaked havoc on my island, so Maya and I are making our escape. I’ve fastened her under my robe using a belt I snatched quickly from the inventory. I’m bringing an extra apple for her, in case the poisoned castaways breathe on her. We just have to make it out to open water and they’ll all die from the poison or be pushed overboard anyway. As a precaution, I’m taking the pages about myself and Maya with me so I might reread them on lonely nights.
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Post by Hermes on Jun 22, 2012 17:11:58 GMT -5
Oh, gosh, weird upon weird. You win on weirdness too. They were planning to have a baby? Um.
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Post by csc on Jun 22, 2012 17:42:37 GMT -5
My final entry. I hope I'm not too late.
F.D., SUFFOCATING LOVE, SUNNY/INK
Sunny was happy. She enjoyed living in Uncle Monty’s house, she had much fun with the snakes, researching information with her brother and playing with her big sister. But what she liked the most about living at Montgomery’s house was the Incredibly Deadly Viper. She had much fun with it and it had much fun with her. They spent all day together, playing of biting each other, it would throw Sunny in the air and pick her up. They would slide through the house and scare Violet while she was working. They had a blast.
And then one day, on their daily fun times, Sunny looked into the Viper’s mouth, right when it was about to lift her up. As it tilted its head up, Sunny fell into its mouth. The Viper coughed and coughed and the youngest Baudelaire shrieked and tried to claw her way back up. But it was all in vain. She was trapped in its stomach. As much as she fought, she couldn’t free herself.
The snake was choking. It could not breath, inhale, with Sunny fighting it from the inside. The coughing wouldn’t stop. It tried to get the baby out, but it seemed impossible. They both struggled and started to get tired. Both of them had no oxygen supply and were getting sleepy. Sunny’s eyes were starting to close. She was soaked and moving seemed impossible. The blonde-haired girl started to imagine she was in her crib.
The Viper laid its head down. It knew Sunny was inside its belly and felt guilty and… strangely happy. It felt that it wouldn’t want to die with anyone else. The Baudelaire had gotten an eternal place in its heart and was its best friend. Peace covered the huge snake like a warm blanket. Its eyes shut closed. Meanwhile, the playful baby was now fading away. As if she were in a comfortable bed, she started to dream. Moments before she died, Sunny dreamt of playing with the Viper.
“I wouldn’t want to be with anyone else” she thought, or in baby-speak, “Amour” ---- It's quite short, but, yeah.
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Post by Cafe SalMONAlla on Jun 22, 2012 20:50:05 GMT -5
Thanks to everyone who has submitted entries. I love all the weirdness swirling around the air of this thread. At the end of this day, voting will open.
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Post by Cafe SalMONAlla on Jun 23, 2012 1:46:29 GMT -5
VOTING OPENS! Thanks to all the wonderful writers who have submitted entries for the contest. Today is the day to vote for your favourite piece! The poll will stay open until the end of the day, and on Sunday the winner will be announced. Good luck to all the entrants! L
Note: sorry to Sixteen, but I had to abbreviate the first three words of his title, because the poll had some stupid word limit. Hope you don't mind.
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Post by Dante on Jun 23, 2012 3:41:17 GMT -5
Ink... eats her? Wow. Also, congratulations to Brunch and Sherry Ann on theirs, which I enjoyed; Sherry Ann, was Ishmael hiding Maya under his robe a reference to Friday hiding Ink under hers, since neither could possibly fit? Or was it a nod to Odysseus's escape from Polyphemus, hiding himself under a giant sheep?
Picking a winner is going to be tough...
Edit: Suffocating Love didn't get on the poll? Was it too late, or is there a one-entry limit per person?
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Post by Cafe SalMONAlla on Jun 23, 2012 4:11:56 GMT -5
I'm so sorry. I guess I must have missed it. Unfortunately, I'm not sure how to edit a poll, or even delete it. If anyone knows, please help.
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Post by B. on Jun 23, 2012 4:39:21 GMT -5
@sherry-Ann: Did you draw inspiration from a certain forum member's alleged love of a sheep?
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Post by Kensicle on Jun 23, 2012 4:52:22 GMT -5
Indeed, I asked that too. I've just read over all the stories, and they're great and very weird. (We'll have Sunny/Birdcage next...)
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Post by Cafe SalMONAlla on Jun 23, 2012 5:09:12 GMT -5
IMPORTANT: Sorry guys, but due to me screwing up this poll, you will have to cast (or re-cast) your votes in this new thread this new thread I've made for that purpose. DO NOT use the poll here. I'm so sorry.
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Post by Christmas Chief on Jun 23, 2012 6:11:50 GMT -5
Ink... eats her? Wow. Also, congratulations to Brunch and Sherry Ann on theirs, which I enjoyed; Sherry Ann, was Ishmael hiding Maya under his robe a reference to Friday hiding Ink under hers, since neither could possibly fit? Or was it a nod to Odysseus's escape from Polyphemus, hiding himself under a giant sheep? The former; the latter never occurred to me, but great idea. That would have been an interesting reversal. @sherry-Ann: Did you draw inspiration from a certain forum member's alleged love of a sheep? Actually, yes. The idea someone could be in love with a sheep at once intrigued and amused me, and that there happened to be a sheep in ASOUE was an immediate inspiration.
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Post by Invisible on Jun 24, 2012 11:15:03 GMT -5
Don't have time right now, but will read the other entries another time
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