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Post by Charles Vane on Aug 5, 2013 0:05:52 GMT -5
WAY TO BE DUCK.
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Post by Rellim on Aug 6, 2013 1:36:17 GMT -5
This is excellent. I've loved reading it so far. I can't seem to stop smiling.
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Post by Sixteen on Aug 6, 2013 9:12:02 GMT -5
8: The Bridesmaids
“Nnngh... my head. What happened?” Bee sat up and immediately regretted her decision. The room was spinning and it felt as though her brain was trying to burst out of the skull that usually kept it in place. She was in a hotel room, as far as she could tell, though it had been well and truly destroyed. There was a hole in the wall above her bed and the chandelier on the ceiling was swinging precariously by a wire.
She vaguely remembered checking in with her friends. “Sherry Ann? Pandora?” she called. From underneath a pile of mattresses, Pandora emerged, rubbing her temples. “Where are we?” she asked, looking around the room. “Where’s Sherry Ann?” “Mashallah” Sherry Ann mumbled as she fell out of the wardrobe. Pandora and Bee screamed when they saw her. “What is it? Stop that screeching!” “Your face!” Bee said in horror. “What have you done to your face?” Sherry Ann made her way to a mirror. It was suddenly obvious what the others were screaming about. Scrawled across Sherry Ann’s left check was a tattoo of Mike Tyson’s face. “Well this is certainly strange,” she said with a puzzled look, causing Tyson’s forehead to wrinkle. A noise came from the bathroom, startling each of the bridesmaids. Bee cautiously opened the door and slammed it shut much more quickly.
Before Pandora could ask what Bee had seen, her phone began to ring. It was her roommate’s number. “This isn’t really a good time,” Pandora answered. “What’s going on?” her roommate asked, just as another crash came from the bathroom. “What’s that noise in the background?” “Look, we’ve got it under control,” Pandora lied. “I’ll see you at the wedding tomorrow.” With that she hung up and tossed the phone aside. Bee looked like she was going to faint and Sherry Ann was still admiring her new body art. “We need to get some fresh air,” Pandora said, “to clear our heads. Come on.” They glanced outside to make sure the coast was clear and hurried over to the elevators. In the lobby of the hotel they ordered drinks and discussed their situation. “I remember checking in,” Bee said. “We came to Vegas to blow off steam before the wedding but I can’t remember anything from last night.” “Me neither,” Pandora said. “I can’t remember anything either,” Sherry Ann said in agreement, “which can lead me to only one conclusion. We were all wasted last night.” Bee and Pandora nodded. That sounded about right. “Wait a second,” Bee yelped, standing up. “Where’s Sophie?” They looked around, realising for the first time that their friend was nowhere to be seen.
The three bridesmaids rushed to find a member of staff, hoping they would know what happened to Sophie. A bellhop named Bryan was standing beside the doors. Pandora approached him. Before she had reached his side, however, he began to say something. “Your room is a mess,” he said, winking over-enthusiastically. Pandora looked him up and down, insulted. “Nice uniform, dick.” She was turning away when Bryan grabbed her arm and slipped the keys to a Porsche into her hand. He nodded to the valet standing outside and winked again. “Thanks...” Pandora said, slipping out of his grasp. She called the others and they walked outside, hoping Sophie would be in the car.
“I don’t know,” Pandora said. “He just told me our room was a mess and then slipped me the keys. He obviously recognises us anyway.” “Here’s the car,” Sherry Ann pointed out. The valet parked the Porsche in front of them and opened the door. From nowhere, someone barged through the bridesmaids and punched out the valet. She sped off into the distance, leaving a trail of carnage in her wake. “Get up,” Bee said. “We don’t want to be found near any of this.” “Yeah,” Sophie said from the corner, “especially with your track record.”
“Sophie?!” the bridesmaids screamed in unison. “How are you feeling?” she asked, rubbing Sherry Ann amiably on the head. “What happened last night?” Pandora asked. “We don’t remember anything.” “I’m not surprised,” Sophie replied, laughing. “You were all pretty drunk.” “My deduction was correct,” Sherry Ann said smugly. “Somebody must have spiked our drinks.” “I don’t think so,” Sophie said. “After you tried a sip of beer, you insisted on doing shots. Every five minutes.” “Why aren’t you hungover?” Bee asked. “You guys locked me out on the roof accidentally and by the time I found my way back to you I had sobered up.”
“What about that thing in the bathroom?” Bee asked nervously. “You mean the wolf? I wasn’t sure how you managed to get it back to the hotel but Pandora kept mumbling something about alphas and calling it Derek, the best wolf ever. I thought the less said the better with regards to that.” “Is there anything else we should know?” Pandora asked, embarrassed. Sophie looked at the bedraggled, hungover bridesmaids and decided to spare them the rest of the details, at least until they saw the photos.
The following day, they showed up to take Anka to her wedding. It was almost as if nothing had happened. Sherry Ann needed several layers of makeup to cover her new tattoo though she insisted on keeping it once the wedding was over. Pandora also decided to keep her wolf though she wasn’t allowed to take it to the wedding. The four bridesmaids shared some knowing smiles throughout the ceremony as they stood beneath the giant stained glass window, hoping they wouldn’t get quite as drunk that night.
“If anyone has a reason why these two should not be wed,” the minister said hoarsely, “let them speak now or forever hold their peace...”
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Post by Charles Vane on Aug 6, 2013 10:43:06 GMT -5
um i may be biased, i dont think so, but this is the best chapter ever. please write a spinoff detailing all of our adventures. less coherent posts to follow.
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Post by Charles Vane on Aug 6, 2013 10:43:55 GMT -5
SHE GOT A MIKE TYSON TATTOO. ON HER FACE. DOES SHERRY ANN EVEN KNOW WHO THAT IS?
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Post by Charles Vane on Aug 6, 2013 10:44:37 GMT -5
IF SHE DOESNT THAT MAKES IT EVEN BETTER AND SHES KEEPING IT AFTER THE WEDDING
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Post by Charles Vane on Aug 6, 2013 10:45:43 GMT -5
sherry ann saying waking up hingover and still saying mashallah may be my fav part though
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Post by Charles Vane on Aug 6, 2013 10:46:08 GMT -5
EXCEPT FOR THE PART WHERE I GOT A WOLF NAMED DEREK.
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Post by Charles Vane on Aug 6, 2013 10:47:36 GMT -5
sherry ann detecting that everyone was drunk is my other favorite part.
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Post by Charles Vane on Aug 6, 2013 10:48:08 GMT -5
this is all also totally accurate because i am not a role model and i would be partying with minors.
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Post by Charles Vane on Aug 6, 2013 10:50:02 GMT -5
SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS
EVERYBODY
i need to teach sherry ann this song
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Post by Charles Vane on Aug 6, 2013 10:55:12 GMT -5
oh i also liked the part with bryan. someone please write a story where bee, sherry ann, sohpie and i are all secret agents accidentally, unknowingly and awesomely.
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Post by Hermes on Aug 6, 2013 10:57:41 GMT -5
Oh wow. I did wonder if the bridesmaids would turn out to be anyone important. I'm now wondering if ....
But I was rather hoping that SHERRYANN would be another secret organisation.
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Post by Kit's tits kick ticks on Aug 6, 2013 17:58:07 GMT -5
I'm wondering what Hermes is wondering if. I had to catch up quite a bit after being away for only 5 days! The story keeps getting more and more awesome. I especially liked the duck chapter
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Post by Charles Vane on Aug 6, 2013 23:57:24 GMT -5
lets talk more about how amazing this chapter is
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