Antenora
Detriment Deleter 
Fiendish Philologist
Put down that harpoon gun, in the name of these wonderful birds!
Posts: 15,891 
Likes: 113
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Post by Antenora on Apr 10, 2004 9:17:51 GMT -5
So said the doorman in The Ersatz Elevator, or rather a friend of his. Recall that the doorman is the hook-handed man.
My train of reasoning went like this:
-Phil of Lucky Smells would say that every problem has a solution.
-The hook-handed man knew him, or once did.
-Therefore, at sometime, the hook-handed man worked at Lucky Smells.....And that's how he lost his hands.
Understandably, he left after the accident and had to seek employment in freak shows and theater troops. Olaf accepted him, proving that he has a good side, however small.
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Post by QuagmireSnicket on Apr 10, 2004 11:43:05 GMT -5
Come on, dont you know? He is most likely talking about Count Olaf!
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Post by QuagmireSnicket on Apr 10, 2004 11:44:24 GMT -5
I like your theory though!
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Post by Madamluna on Apr 10, 2004 11:51:37 GMT -5
So said the doorman in The Ersatz Elevator, or rather a friend of his. Recall that the doorman is the hook-handed man. My train of reasoning went like this: -Phil of Lucky Smells would say that every problem has a solution. -The hook-handed man knew him, or once did. -Therefore, at sometime, the hook-handed man worked at Lucky Smells.....And that's how he lost his hands. Understandably, he left after the accident and had to seek employment in freak shows and theater troops. Olaf accepted him, proving that he has a good side, however small. WHOA, I never thought of that before! Awesome theory, A++++++ would do business again! You brightened up my day a little bit. Why does this make me so happy? Why why why? It just does. |
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Antenora
Detriment Deleter
Fiendish Philologist
Put down that harpoon gun, in the name of these wonderful birds!
Posts: 15,891
Likes: 113
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Post by Antenora on Apr 10, 2004 13:00:54 GMT -5
Come on, dont you know? He is most likely talking about Count Olaf! But, when did Count Olaf say that? If Olaf had said that every problem had a solution before book six, that would have been a clue to who the doorman was. Olaf hasn't said that, or anything really close to it, yet. But if he does, my theory may fall apart. MadameLuna, I'm glad I brightened your day. It's good to know how your favorite henchman(isn't Hooky your favorite?) acquired his interesting distinguishing characteristic. What did you mean by "A++++++ would do business again"? |
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Post by Madamluna on Apr 10, 2004 13:14:27 GMT -5
MadameLuna, I'm glad I brightened your day. It's good to know how your favorite henchman(isn't Hooky your favorite?) acquired his interesting distinguishing characteristic. Yes he is~ <3 Nice base for a fanfic, too. Haha, it's an eBay reference (unless I have my pop culture wrong)--when someone leaves you feedback a lot of times they go "A++ would do business again." |
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Post by QuagmireSnicket on Apr 10, 2004 14:58:20 GMT -5
Yes Count Olaf hasnt said that but it would make sense if he did because his solution to every problem is burning it down! Maybe it was Count Olaf maybe it wasnt. Well, I dont have a theory to back me up so I'll just be quiet. Anyways as I said I like your theory so I'll just stick with it for now
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Luigi
Bewildered Beginner
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Post by Luigi on Apr 10, 2004 15:45:07 GMT -5
So said the doorman in The Ersatz Elevator, or rather a friend of his. Recall that the doorman is the hook-handed man. My train of reasoning went like this: -Phil of Lucky Smells would say that every problem has a solution. -The hook-handed man knew him, or once did. -Therefore, at sometime, the hook-handed man worked at Lucky Smells.....And that's how he lost his hands. Understandably, he left after the accident and had to seek employment in freak shows and theater troops. Olaf accepted him, proving that he has a good side, however small. Excellent. Captious: V. excellent. |
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Post by ParsleySoda667 on Apr 11, 2004 17:25:45 GMT -5
Wow. I always thought Count Olaf cut off hooky's hands because he addresssed Count Olaf the wrong way, This new theory is awesome! Way to go.
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Post by QuagmireSnicket on Apr 11, 2004 17:27:13 GMT -5
Why did you think that?
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Post by Madamluna on Apr 11, 2004 17:30:35 GMT -5
I wrote a fanfic about Olaf cutting off Lucafont's hands, but that was because he kinda fuxxed up a heist/Olaf was a jerkoff.
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Post by ScaryCrackers on Apr 11, 2004 21:48:11 GMT -5
Hmmm, good theory. Interesting stuff. Hooky should just scratch off Olaf's face, he's too good for him.
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Antenora
Detriment Deleter
Fiendish Philologist
Put down that harpoon gun, in the name of these wonderful birds!
Posts: 15,891
Likes: 113
|
Post by Antenora on Apr 11, 2004 22:08:03 GMT -5
Hooky should tear up Kevin really, really soon. No offense to ambidextrous people or those using the screenname Kevin, but I can't stand Kevin, the ambidextrous bundle of self-pity.
Before book 10 came out, I was hoping that the other henchfolks would bury Kevin alive in the snow. Alas, we'll have to wait for the next book to see what happens to him, if anything.
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Post by ScaryCrackers on Apr 12, 2004 8:40:54 GMT -5
Very true, he's such a self-pity freak. Instead of burying him in the snow, they should make him stuff snow down his throat with both of his equally strong hands until he can't whine anymore about his equally strong hands.  |
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Post by Madamluna on Apr 12, 2004 9:19:32 GMT -5
I hate all of the new freaks and I will explain why using the little alligator mouth they taught me in third grade.
Lucafont > Kevin because having two equally strong hands isn't jack compared to having sharp metal instruments of DEATH permantly implanted at the end of your arms. Plus Lucafont isn't an annoying bundle of angst (except in fanfics, but nobody writes fanfics of Kevin because HE SUCKS).
The powder twins > Colette because being able to turn yourself into a ball isn't as useful as having two of yourself. And they don't have annoying French accents either.
Flacutono > Hugo because he's got a better voice actor (he's got THREE better voices, actually), he doesn't filch Lucafont's clothes and his creepiness factor outweighs Hugo's by a zillion pounds or whatever you measure creepiness factor with. Hugo is just kind of...humpbacked, but Flacutono is a seminecropedophile (I don't the word for someone attracted to people in comas ;_;) who wears a curly white wig, and I like white wigs so nuts to you, Hugo.
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