Post by Madamluna on Mar 11, 2004 15:05:27 GMT -5
...Without Really Trying.
Leddies'n jennlemen, I present to you a guide to making your own subculture. Originally written last month, but I never posted it. But due to popular demand (Sunny's Pacifier), I figured I may as well post it for your benefit.
This guide will include generous amounts of cynicism and will be sure to offend everyone who actually does belong to a subculture.
Enjoy.
---
HOW TO SUCCEED IN MAKING YOUR OWN SUBCULTURE WITHOUT REALLY TRYING
Written by Madam Luna
Goth. Punk. Retro. Emo. Mod, industrial, ghetto, raver--what do these all have in common? Well, duh, they're some of the most popular subcultures today. You can spot thousands of teenagers hanging out in shopping malls, smoking their preferred brand of non-tobacco cigarette and proclaiming how everyone who isn't like them isn't an individual.
But you--ah, you're a special one. You don't want to follow the crowd, because deep in your heart, you're a leader! Yes indeed, to make one of these fascinating microcosms in which your devoted trendies slavishly update their style with every fluctuation in your own subculture, no matter how nonsensical or unoriginal...truly the American dream.
Sounds good, I hear you say, but cut the melodrama and get to the good stuff. Well, just take a gander at my handy guide and start infecting high-school sophomores across the nation today!
Step One: Pick a style of music.
This is of the utmost importance. With the exception of STRAIGHTxEDGE, which isn't really a subculture because everyone who's a part of it (13-16 year olds) is basically doing what they're supposed to anyway, every subculture has a genre of music behind it. If you can't find one that's not taken by someone else, pick one and make up a new name for it. People do it all the time.
Step Two: Mix and match fashions.
Of course, this is impossible. One cannot "mix" and "match," so do your best.
Go crazy. Remember, you're pouring your heart and soul into this trend which will have a shelf life of maximum ten years, so make sure it's really original and individual, and just shouts out you. For example, maybe you should try cutting off the sleeves of some of your shirts, and ripping holes in the knees of your pants! You might even want to cut some holes in some fishnet stockings, and bleach out spots of your black clothes. Actually, why stop there? If you really wanted to be original, go crazy and cut enormous gaps in the fabric of every single item you wear. Except maybe underwear. Unfortunately, this leaves you with very little clothing at all, so maybe you should go out and buy more.
See, now you have your own "uniform." Good job!
Step Three: Hobbies and interests.
There's more to life in your new little corner of society than sitting at the mall and glaring at people. There's image. What do you really like to do? Now, remember that when I say "really like to do" I don't mean "what makes you feel content or gives an overall feeling of pleasure." I'm referring to "a list of items you will make up that will attract people to you." Be rebellious. Your parents? They're square--you adore piercings in the shape of anarchy signs. Pop music? Hate it, wish it would die--give me poison-core1 any day. America? Bah, capitalist scum! Here's your hammer and sickle pin2, welcome to the club.
But wait, you say. Wait a second. What if I don't actually believe in those? I'm not even a Communist, I'm fairly sure poison-core doesn't exist, and I don't like getting 45 metal piercings just to spell out an A in a circle.
Well, of course you don't have to believe in those, silly rabbit! All you have to do is stick with it for a week or two until you get a bunch of people with you, then radically change what your subculture stands for. Some long-standing subcultures have even done this for years and years and years!
For example, let's stick with the previous interests--anarchy piercings, Communism, and poison-core. The piercings'll hurt the first few days, but after two or three weeks, maybe even a month if you're so inclined, you'll have a healthy amount of people that hang around you, and now's when you can get to the fun part--switching around the hobbies. Go home, take off your anarchy pins and get a washable tattoo of the Legend of Zelda logo. When your now-trendy friends ask you what's up with it, just tell them that such-and-such imaginary poison-core band released a Zelda tribute song, which is really rare and you only found it on Kazaa after like a month of searching3 and it's awesome. So anyone who's anyone's getting that Zelda tattoo. And those anarchy piercings, well, they're not cool anymore because of such-and-such nonsensical reason.
And, like some sort of human science experiment, watch them all change their appearance over the next week. Do this a few times, not huge changes, just gradual modifications...and then, to really kick them for a loop, change your hobbies to the exact opposite of what they were before. Make up a reason, no matter how implausible.
That's about it. Now, go out there and make yourself a mini-pioneer! You can do it. You're a smart boy. Or girl.
---
Footnotes:
1: I just made poison-core up. Mark my words, someone'll come up with a genre for it a week from now.
2: I actually have a hammer and sickle pin on my furry black Russian hat. I = l33t
3: Notice that it says "month of searching" even though this imaginary subculture's only been up for at most three weeks. People will not notice.[/size]
Leddies'n jennlemen, I present to you a guide to making your own subculture. Originally written last month, but I never posted it. But due to popular demand (Sunny's Pacifier), I figured I may as well post it for your benefit.
This guide will include generous amounts of cynicism and will be sure to offend everyone who actually does belong to a subculture.
Enjoy.
---
HOW TO SUCCEED IN MAKING YOUR OWN SUBCULTURE WITHOUT REALLY TRYING
Written by Madam Luna
Goth. Punk. Retro. Emo. Mod, industrial, ghetto, raver--what do these all have in common? Well, duh, they're some of the most popular subcultures today. You can spot thousands of teenagers hanging out in shopping malls, smoking their preferred brand of non-tobacco cigarette and proclaiming how everyone who isn't like them isn't an individual.
But you--ah, you're a special one. You don't want to follow the crowd, because deep in your heart, you're a leader! Yes indeed, to make one of these fascinating microcosms in which your devoted trendies slavishly update their style with every fluctuation in your own subculture, no matter how nonsensical or unoriginal...truly the American dream.
Sounds good, I hear you say, but cut the melodrama and get to the good stuff. Well, just take a gander at my handy guide and start infecting high-school sophomores across the nation today!
Step One: Pick a style of music.
This is of the utmost importance. With the exception of STRAIGHTxEDGE, which isn't really a subculture because everyone who's a part of it (13-16 year olds) is basically doing what they're supposed to anyway, every subculture has a genre of music behind it. If you can't find one that's not taken by someone else, pick one and make up a new name for it. People do it all the time.
Step Two: Mix and match fashions.
Of course, this is impossible. One cannot "mix" and "match," so do your best.
Go crazy. Remember, you're pouring your heart and soul into this trend which will have a shelf life of maximum ten years, so make sure it's really original and individual, and just shouts out you. For example, maybe you should try cutting off the sleeves of some of your shirts, and ripping holes in the knees of your pants! You might even want to cut some holes in some fishnet stockings, and bleach out spots of your black clothes. Actually, why stop there? If you really wanted to be original, go crazy and cut enormous gaps in the fabric of every single item you wear. Except maybe underwear. Unfortunately, this leaves you with very little clothing at all, so maybe you should go out and buy more.
See, now you have your own "uniform." Good job!
Step Three: Hobbies and interests.
There's more to life in your new little corner of society than sitting at the mall and glaring at people. There's image. What do you really like to do? Now, remember that when I say "really like to do" I don't mean "what makes you feel content or gives an overall feeling of pleasure." I'm referring to "a list of items you will make up that will attract people to you." Be rebellious. Your parents? They're square--you adore piercings in the shape of anarchy signs. Pop music? Hate it, wish it would die--give me poison-core1 any day. America? Bah, capitalist scum! Here's your hammer and sickle pin2, welcome to the club.
But wait, you say. Wait a second. What if I don't actually believe in those? I'm not even a Communist, I'm fairly sure poison-core doesn't exist, and I don't like getting 45 metal piercings just to spell out an A in a circle.
Well, of course you don't have to believe in those, silly rabbit! All you have to do is stick with it for a week or two until you get a bunch of people with you, then radically change what your subculture stands for. Some long-standing subcultures have even done this for years and years and years!
For example, let's stick with the previous interests--anarchy piercings, Communism, and poison-core. The piercings'll hurt the first few days, but after two or three weeks, maybe even a month if you're so inclined, you'll have a healthy amount of people that hang around you, and now's when you can get to the fun part--switching around the hobbies. Go home, take off your anarchy pins and get a washable tattoo of the Legend of Zelda logo. When your now-trendy friends ask you what's up with it, just tell them that such-and-such imaginary poison-core band released a Zelda tribute song, which is really rare and you only found it on Kazaa after like a month of searching3 and it's awesome. So anyone who's anyone's getting that Zelda tattoo. And those anarchy piercings, well, they're not cool anymore because of such-and-such nonsensical reason.
And, like some sort of human science experiment, watch them all change their appearance over the next week. Do this a few times, not huge changes, just gradual modifications...and then, to really kick them for a loop, change your hobbies to the exact opposite of what they were before. Make up a reason, no matter how implausible.
That's about it. Now, go out there and make yourself a mini-pioneer! You can do it. You're a smart boy. Or girl.
---
Footnotes:
1: I just made poison-core up. Mark my words, someone'll come up with a genre for it a week from now.
2: I actually have a hammer and sickle pin on my furry black Russian hat. I = l33t
3: Notice that it says "month of searching" even though this imaginary subculture's only been up for at most three weeks. People will not notice.[/size]