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Post by Madamluna on Mar 13, 2004 11:43:52 GMT -5
Not a big poetry person, but my English teacher really liked this, so I figured some of you might get a kick out of it. It's an Elizabethan sonnet. Kind of a downer, maybe? A little bit...
"Ah, can you see the world sparkle and shine Like a diamond that wanders, adrift in the sea? Our world is eroding. The passage of time Is slowly erasing our reason to be. Day fades into night, punctures dark with a ray As the sun and the moon circle ‘round in the sky. The people on Earth only get in the way As we’re conceived, then exist, and then live, and then die. Perpetual motion with Cambrian notion That covers the past and goes blindly ahead. And the world is lost in a perpetual ocean Of negativity: fearful with anger and dread. To stop this infinite cycle of doomed evolution Take my hand in yours: start the world revolution."
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Post by Madamluna on Mar 13, 2004 19:44:09 GMT -5
Yeah, I'm not that good at poetry (possibly because I don't write it very much?). The only thing I really like about this one is the rhythm. And "perpetual motion with Cambrian notion."
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Post by negativenine on Mar 18, 2004 23:13:21 GMT -5
Wow... I missed this. I'm sorry!
I like this line, too:
"Perpetual motion with Cambrian notion" and "And the world is lost in a perpetual ocean" because it follows well and they sound cool together... I know I skipped a line, but those ones really stuck out for me.
I wish we got to do sonnets and such in our English classes... We never even learned the meter or anything. It was like, "there was this guy called Shakespeare... he wrote sonnets, this is one: [insert sonnet]... now we move on and try to prove that Shakespeare was illiterate". Ridiculous.
Anyway, you write well... VERY well for not being a "big poetry person".
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