Rank Best-Worst Guardians

[veryferociousdrama]

I'm sure there have been threads like this in the past, but what's everyone's opinions on best-worst guardians? Official and unofficial, either book or TV, anything goes. Disclaimer: my own will only include up to TCC, and TV only.

1. Uncle Monty.
2. Olivia Caliban.
3. Jerome Squalor.
4. Charles.
5. Hal.
6.. Hector.
7. Aunt Josephine.
8. Council of Elders.
9. Prufrock Prep.
10. Esme Squalor.
11. Sir.
12. Count Olaf.

Your thoughts?

[Foxy]

I am only using the characters from books 1-7. (Please note: the characters are ordered from worst to best.)

7. Count Olaf
Yikes, where to start. He only gave the children one bed. He made them do developmentally inappropriate chores. He struck Klaus across the face. He locked Sunny up in a cage, which I find to be the most despicable act of the book. He tried to marry Violet and steal the children's fortune.

6. Josephine Anwhistle
Her irrational fears make her a completely dreadful guardian. She was willing to give the children up to Count Olaf to save her own skin. Enough said.

5. Sir
The only reason Sir is better than Count Olaf is because he isn't evil (although quite a jerk, to use his words when describing Count Olaf) and did not try to steal the children's fortune. He was willing to give the children up, like Aunt Josephine, but he did think he was giving them to "Shirley," not Count Olaf. He forced the children to work in the lumbar mill, which again was developmentally inappropriate for children, and he paid his employees in coupons.

4. Jerome & Esme Squalor
One half of this guardianship was a decent person (sort of). The Baudelaires had a pretty nice place to live up in the penthouse, albeit boring what with all of their interests being "out." Jerome was kind to the children, but mostly unhelpful. Esme pushed the children down an elevator shaft and joined up with Count Olaf, so I can't rank the couple any higher.

3. Montgomery Montgomery
Uncle Monty is a nice guy, but he does not listen to the children, and look where that gets him! He did make cake, though, and the children had a few good days living with him and learning new things about reptiles before Count Olaf showed up.

2. Hector
I want to rank Hector #1. I really do. The huevos rancheros sound heavenly, and he listens to the children and believes everything they say! But he also can't man up enough to save them from being burned at the stake, which is kind of a big deal.

1. Prufrock Preparatory School
I think Prufrock Prep wins by default. Everyone else either pushed them down an elevator shaft, got murdered, forced them to work in a lumbar mill, etc. There is really not much good going on here. The teachers are uninspiring to say the least, the children are forced to live in a shack with crabs and fungus, and the vice principal is completely inane. Carmelita Spats is also the most dreadful popular girl in any fictional work I have read. BUT the children do meet friends in the Quagmires, and that friendship ends up being one of the rays of sunshine in the series.