The End: First Few Pages (SPOILERS)

[RockSunner]

This chapter looks bogus to me. Olaf's boast that the fire 'destroyed V.F.D. once and for all' is inconsistent with the facts in TPP.

1) In the last chapter of TPP, Olaf complained that the fire was burning slowly and many people would escape.

2) There are other V.F.D. members who weren't present at the fire (at least Kit, Widdershins, Hector, and the Quagmires that we know of) who were warned away by Sunny's signal.

3) Olaf didn't get the sugar bowl and must assume it's in the hands of his enemies.

Besides that, the onion metaphor is a poor one. Nobody peels an onion that way -- they peel the first layer off and then slice it up. This chapter is lacking in Snicket sparkle.

[Antenora]

Perhaps what Olaf meant is that he's destroyed VFD's last safe place, and hence anyone who escaped would have no place to go. And the text specifies that he's boasting; he's often been inaccurate while doing so, and recently he's come across as not very intelligent-- misspelling "poison" and generally acting a bit foolish. So Olaf doesn't really qualify as a reliable narrator.

[Wizz]

On Buy.com, underneath the chapter the copyright information seems quite accurate and possibly shows that the chapter maybe real:

Excerpted from A Series of Unfortunate Events #13: The Endby Lemony Snicket Copyright © 2006 by Lemony Snicket. Excerpted by permission.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.

[Jacques the Environmentalist]

The onion thing did remind me of Shrek.
This gives me strong deja vu from tgg, I mean it's the same thing, they're sailing down the water thinking about stuff (Violet inventions, Klaus readings, and Sunny cooking) although this time the water is calm and Olaf is with them. that's pretty much the only difference. And it's a boat not a broken toboggan.

[orphansrgreat]

dgrune said:

I've been wrong before, and I'll even be the first to admit it, but here are the reasons why I think this excerpt is fake:

First, the writer says "if you insist on reading each and every thin, papery layer in A Series of Unfortunate Events, your only reward will be 170 chapters of misery in your library " but 13 books X 13 chapters = 169 chapters. Either the writer can't multiply or there is a bonus chapter in The End.

Second, he writes "The elder Baudelaires could imagine their sister announcing "Soubise!" which was her way of saying 'Dinner is served.' " Why is Sunny going back to her baby talk? That is an easy sentence and she could at least say "Dinner".

Third, Olaf's dialogue seems to fanfic-ish.
"I've triumphed"
"You orphans thought you could escape me, but at last you're in my clutches!"
"I've burned down the Hotel Denouement," Olaf cried, gesturing dramatically, "and destroyed V.F.D. once and for all!"
It just seems too much like something a fan wrote, not Handler.

Gigi is right. its like a fan wrote it. . .

[Snicketfaerie]

Oh please This is and real excerpt and it is true there is 14 chapters in The End.

[Gigi]

snicketfaerie said:

Oh please This is and real excerpt and it is true there is 14 chapters in The End.

Could you site your source to back up such an adamant statement?

[notebooks222]

I really don't think it's real. There's a lot of good reasons why it isn't that have already been mentioned. The good spelling is no proof for it to be real. Anyone can use spellcheck. I really don't think snicket would just let the first chapter leak out like that. It would come with an author tracker.
About the number of chapters: Let's say this is real. Then it wouldn't be a mistake. It would be pretty hard to be off by 1 when mutliplying. How would you manage that? Snicket would put that in to try to trick us. We'd go "Oh, I guess there's really that many chapters in the series" and would never check. There would be some Epilogue or something. Wouldn't you rather read on in the last book than stop and do some math? But then this could just as well support this being fake. Someone could've thought that up and put it in to make it look just that much real. But in conclusion: whoever wrote this did not make a math mistake since it would never happen to be off by 1 when mutliplying especially with a calculator. Whoever wrote this purposely put that in, either to make it look more real (if it's fake) or to be a surprise for anyone that looks more closely (if it's real).

[Brownie]

Maybe "Not a Chapter" counts. That would be a bit ironic though seeing as there's not a chapter, and there are 170 chapters. I'm sticking with the epilogue idea. Yet another mystery, I reallt didn't think anything'd come up before TE came. -lesigh- I'm a bit depressed now.

[Jacques the Environmentalist]

I still think it's real though I haven't IRREFUTABLE proof.
The 170 will refer to an epilogue because they're called "not a chapter" because they are NOT counted into the overall number of chapters and there were two of them so that would make 171, not 170.

[Brownie]

mynamesjacques said:

I still think it's real though I haven't IRREFUTABLE proof.
The 170 will refer to an epilogue because they're called "not a chapter" because they are NOT counted into the overall number of chapters and there were two of them so that would make 171, not 170.

No, one was "Not A Chapter," and one was "ALSO Not A Chapter!" Heehee I like being really twisted.

[Deleted]

prewrite said:

mynamesjacques said:

I still think it's real though I haven't IRREFUTABLE proof.
The 170 will refer to an epilogue because they're called "not a chapter" because they are NOT counted into the overall number of chapters and there were two of them so that would make 171, not 170.

No, one was "Not A Chapter," and one was "ALSO Not A Chapter!" Heehee I like being really twisted.

What? Now I'm lost

[orphansrgreat]

hatramroany said:

prewrite said:

No, one was "Not A Chapter," and one was "ALSO Not A Chapter!" Heehee I like being really twisted.

What? Now I'm lost

Well in the Penultimate Peril there is one chapter with the title, Not a chapter and another thats says, Also not a chapter.

Got it?

[Deathly Hallow]

I laugh it turns out to be real and then most of you are proved wrong...again!!!!! Ha ha, anyway, sorry if that seemed mean. There will most likely be an extra chapter on what happens after book 13 ya know.

[egad]

snicket couldv'e just messed up on the 170. In tpp he said 'sunny begged with her sisters' or something along those lines and klaus is a boy unless he strips to reaveal he is really a girl in te, but that is unlikly lol

EDIT: he could have changed it around and let the mikked with version leak out. Besides, he let the cover and the title leak out way before now, and this doesn't even give out any plot, just tha bauds were hungry and that's acceptable.

I'm rereading the series a bunch before te comes out, and I noticed that olaf was goig to take the quags to an island, so h might be meeteing them and the vfd eagles at that island where they find ffp and have the forbidden fruit and all that. It's prabably been mentioned before, but i might as well say i noticed it now