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Post by Dante on Aug 6, 2005 13:38:15 GMT -5
That certainly fills in the gaps. And was well-written. And, eh, I can't think of any good comments. But then again, maybe those were.
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Antenora
Detriment Deleter
Fiendish Philologist
Put down that harpoon gun, in the name of these wonderful birds!
Posts: 15,891
Likes: 113
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Post by Antenora on Aug 6, 2005 13:51:35 GMT -5
That was excellent, and the scene with Dante and I was quite...emotional, and [for lack of a better term] touching.
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Post by PJ on Aug 7, 2005 6:19:15 GMT -5
Cool, though the Haloman thing was a bit anticlimatical. But yeah, this is teh coolz0r.
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Post by Akbar Le Grey on Aug 7, 2005 9:22:06 GMT -5
Very cool. Really,we need more stories like this. Well done, Setnick.
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Post by s on Feb 4, 2006 16:38:15 GMT -5
This is perhaps stupid of me, but I wrote more today due to lack of anything better to do. I really do want to finish this sometime, I just lack the time to do so. Anyway, here goes:
Despite the stress of this confrontation, nobody was more relieved by its occurrence than Dante. And from this relief sprung hope and determination. Dante was indeed a good ruler: He knew how to handle power well, and his leadership and organizational skills were phenomenal. As soon as he recovered from the shock of the previous day’s events, Dante set about implementing new programs for the bettering of Dark Avenue. Before doing any of this, however, he went and consulted Akbar.
“Akbar.”
“Dante,” Akbar wearily replied. He continued. “I apologize for yesterday’s commotion. In trying to establish peace, I ended up wreaking havoc. I understand if you must punish me.”
“No,” said Dante, “Haloman wrought havoc. I wrought havoc. The only person who has remained a constant throughout this whole ordeal has been you, Akbar. You maintained your ideals despite my despotism; you continued striving for what you knew was right. I commend you. Of course you shan’t be punished.”
Akbar glanced at Dante dubiously. “I shan’t be punished if…?” he inquired. With Dante, there was always an “if.”
“If nothing. Regardless of your future actions, the choices you made yesterday, and for the past few months, have been admirable. In fact, I was wondering if you would join me as an advisor of sorts. Help me keep my temper under check; make me see the error of my ways, et cetera. A kind of second-in-command.”
“Absolutely not!” was Akbar’s furious reply. “You want me to aid you in your tyranny? To abet your campaign of cruelty? If you think I will agree to this political alliance nonsense, you are sorely mistaken. I will not be your puppet, Dante! You are the embodiment of wrath; I, of peace. We will never agree, and you will certainly never force your opinions onto me. Do you fear my defiance? Is that why you want my help? So as to assure yourself that I will not betray you again, as I did yesterday? Well, you cannot have it. I may lack your position of power, Dante, but my voice will be heard as well. And sometime soon, your autocracy will be overthrown. True, I am a pacifist, but if rebellion is the only way to achieve peace, then perhaps it will be necessary. I think –”
“Akbar!” Dante cut him off. “Enough! I only ask for your assistance because I truly want your help. I realize the forum needs reform. And a clear thinker such as you would be the greatest asset I could have.”
-Just a small segment, but I'm working on it.
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Post by twistedbrain on Feb 4, 2006 16:39:16 GMT -5
Love it. It's great.
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Post by Linda Rhaldeen on Feb 4, 2006 18:27:01 GMT -5
Good job, SetnicK. I'm glad you're writing more.
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Post by Dante on Feb 5, 2006 15:29:36 GMT -5
I completely missed that you had updated this yesterday. Great new chapter, and good on you for updating again.
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Post by s on Feb 5, 2006 20:19:44 GMT -5
TwistedBrain...are you meaning to say that you read this several-page story in under a minute? Or are you simply judging the last chapter? Because I don't see what you'd be able to get out of the last chapter alone...
But thanks, everyone. I might not be able to write too much too often but I WILL FINISH!
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Post by SF on Feb 6, 2006 20:47:47 GMT -5
You definintely need to update this more closely together. I just had to read through the first few chapters to remember all that had happened.
This is good though. I liked how you threw in that Akbar is a pacifist. Quite accurate.
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Post by Akbar Le Grey on Feb 8, 2006 13:00:44 GMT -5
Brilliant as always, SetnicK. I hadn't noticed that this was updated. *heddesk*
But I'm glad I found it; do go on.
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Post by s on Feb 18, 2006 17:47:21 GMT -5
Whee! Update!
“Hmm…” pondered Akbar, clearly unconvinced. “You seem repentant enough…and flattery is never completely unwelcome…nevertheless, Dante, you have caused immeasurable harm in the past few months. How can the people of 667 trust you after all you have done to them? How can I trust you? You claim to have new ideals in mind, but…”
Dante interrupted once more. “Since when have I been a liar, Akbar? Wrathful, yes, tyrannical, even, but have I ever lied about my schemes? No – don’t answer – because you and I both know that the answer is no. I am not deceitful. I’m surprised at you, Akbar; I thought we knew each other better than that.”
“Yes,” said Akbar. “Several months ago, so did I.”
For this Dante had no reply. After a moment, however, he spoke. “You are adamant in your refusal, then?”
“Yes,” said Akbar once more. “For the time being, I am.”
“Very well then. I’ll see you around.” Dante hesitated for a moment, then swept away, leaving Akbar alone on the desolate, misty street.
Although due to some strange meteorological phenomenon the street remained misty for weeks, it was not desolate for much longer. No, PJ’s appearance prevented that from being the case.
“Akbar!” he exclaimed. “It’s good to see you again. We tackled Haloman pretty well, don’t you think?”
“Of course,” replied Akbar. “The really cool member got what he deserved.”
PJ grinned and vehemently agreed.
“Although,” pondered Akbar, “we might not have been able to pull it off without Dante’s plan. PJ – what do you think of him? Dante, that is? I adamantly believed that he was as ruthless and cruel as he appeared, what with imprisoning Antenora and establishing his dictatorship. But in the past couple of days, he’s seemed so different. He freed Antenora, of course, but also...just before you left, he asked my assistance. Said he realized the error of his ways…the usual load of garbage. Of course I didn’t believe it. But, as he himself pointed out, Dante’s never been a deceitful person, right? Well…what do you think?”
“I’d give him a chance,” replied PJ, “but under a few stipulations. Like, ‘I’ll join you, but if you ever do anything against the best interests of the members of Dark Avenue, it’ll come back to haunt you. Consider yourself warned.’ But really, Akbar, it’s up to you. And frankly, you don’t seem to be fit to make such a decision right now. You look absolutely exhausted!”
“Yes, well, the last few days haven’t exactly been relaxing, now have they?”
“I know, I know, but just…go home and relax, won’t you? And then think it over, once you’ve recuperated. I’m sure whatever you do will be fine. I mean, seriously, that’s why Dante wants you, isn’t it? Because you never make stupid or rash decisions.”
“I suppose…but I guess I really had better go home now. I’m practically falling over as it is,” Akbar sighed.
“Yeah, see you tomorrow,” answered PJ. “Hopefully this ridiculous fog will be gone by then.”
The two then went their separate ways, each contemplating the events of the past two days.
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Antenora
Detriment Deleter
Fiendish Philologist
Put down that harpoon gun, in the name of these wonderful birds!
Posts: 15,891
Likes: 113
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Post by Antenora on Feb 18, 2006 17:53:24 GMT -5
Thank you for the update. It's very good, very interesting. And the ridiculous persistant fog is a nice touch.
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Post by Akbar Le Grey on Feb 19, 2006 3:03:22 GMT -5
Fabulous, as always.
*falls over*
*magicpractically*
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Post by Dante on Feb 19, 2006 4:01:36 GMT -5
I'm a ruthless dictator, but I'm an honest ruthless dictator. And isn't that what I we all want?
Good update. Everyone seems in character, and as mentioned, the fog is good.
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