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Post by SF on Sept 7, 2005 18:12:54 GMT -5
*starts a mob*Amber you must finish this!
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Post by PJ on Sept 7, 2005 18:21:02 GMT -5
*starts a mob*Amber you must finish this! Dave wills it!
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Dave
Reptile Researcher
Posts: 30
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Post by Dave on Sept 7, 2005 18:21:28 GMT -5
*starts a mob*Amber you must finish this! Dave wills it! I do.
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Post by Amber on Sept 25, 2005 9:51:19 GMT -5
It's been a while. Sorry. But this one is about twice the length of the rest.
Pride PJ pranced around the castle. He had just ‘mastered’ another martial art, Kuen Do. The instructor told PJ that he should never come back to the lessons that he was that awful, but PJ left the class talking very loudly;
“You don’t think I should ever have another lesson?” He asked. And while he was ushered out he carried on “I know, I know. I’m just amazing. It can’t be helped. But if you feel that I’m that good of course I won’t come back.”
He walked away and into the car park. PJ couldn’t drive but he spotted a Taxi. He walked up and tapped on the glass. As the driver unwound the window PJ saw photos of a young family on the dashboard.
“Hi there.” PJ said.
“Wanna lift?” The driver grunted at him.
“Nope” PJ said back.
“Well then, what do you want?” He said.
“Your Taxi” PJ said calmly.
“M..My taxi?” The driver stuttered “No way.”
PJ suddenly stepped towards the driver and put on his best ‘threatening face.
“If you don’t give me your taxi, I will make you give me your taxi. I have just mastered the ancient martial art of Kuen Do. And I’m really strong and really quick.” He whispered.
“Oh, really” he said back and punched PJ in the face and drove off through a puddle, splashing PJ as he went.
“Awe” PJ sat on the ground and then went and to another taxi, one without a driver.
Getting in and driving out of the car park, but not before hitting a wall. He stopped and shouted out the window to a young family walking nearby.
“I meant to do that, isn’t it fabulous how tough these cars are?” He called as they hurried past. Grumbling, he wound the window back up and headed out onto the road.
“Watch where you’re going, asshole” a man called out from another car as PJ swerved lanes for the fifth time.
“Just because you don’t have my amazing skill” PJ called back, but quietly, the man looked strong, and scary.
He drove on until the traffic lights when an old man knocked on the window.
“Can y’take me to the high street?” He asked, breathing heavily.
“Uhh” PJ didn’t know where the high street was but he nodded and the man climbed in the back of the taxi, he looked for a seatbelt, but he didn’t find one. PJ pressed a button after he got in, locking the back doors.
“I’m new to this area so you might have to help me out a bit” He said to the man, hoping he didn’t realise the picture of the real driver on the dashboard was of a woman in her forties.
“Okay then” The man said and got out a map from his pocket. “You are a good driver, though?” He questioned as PJ slammed on the brakes before they hit a tree on the side of the road.
“Oh, the best” PJ said, reversing away from the tree, “Never got my license but I’m awesome”
“You, you don’t have a drivers license?” The man grabbed the armrest.
“Yeah, I tried once, but y’know I just didn’t get it. Bad luck really” PJ said brightly
“What, can I ask, did you get wrong?” The mad asked, his breathing getting even heavier.
“I kept driving into things” He said, as they hit the barrier in the middle of the road “Like that” He pointed out of the window.
“Look at the road!” The man was gasping for breath now, but PJ just ignored it.
“I mean, those barriers are there for a reason. I don’t go over to the other side of the road and we’re all okay. But there was that time when the barrier gave way and I went flying into the river. I was completely unhurt though, can’t say the same for the passengers unfortunately. These taxis are made of strong stuff though.” He hit the dashboard and the glove box fell off, making a big dent in the floor.
“Are you all right back there?” He turned round and asked the man who clutched his chest and pointed at the road.
Ahead of them there was an ugly building that had been built in the sixties as a car park but had recently been closed off. They were heading straight towards one of its ugly walls.
“Uh oh” PJ said and tried to stop the car, but in moving his feet the brake pedal fell off. “Not really that sturdy are they?” He showed the mad the broken pedal and pulled on the handbrake. There was a huge squeal of the tyres, but the car was still hurtling towards the wall.
“Oh, I’ve got to go” PJ said and jumped out of the door, rolling as he hit the ground. The man tried to do the same but where PJ had locked the doors he only managed to set off the car alarm. As the car hit the wall it bunched up and the man was completely squashed. PJ started to run off and the car exploded behind him.
PJ took his phone out of his pocket and pressed one on the speed dial.
“Uhh, hello Father, can you send a car for me?” He asked.
“What do you mean no?” He said.
“Take the bus? Don’t you think I’m a bit above public transport?” He said.
“Hello?” He asked as he heard the click of the other person hanging up.
He searched around for a bit and took another taxi without a driver. The light on the small computer flashed and told him to go to the Italian restaurant down the road. He was headed in that direction anyway so PJ decided to follow the computer’s directions. He jolted to a stop outside the restaurant and a woman in her twenties got in the taxi.
She sat down on the soft seat in the back and PJ decided to talk to her. There were seatbelts in this taxi but she didn’t put it on.
“You know, you’re in the best taxi in all of the country” PJ boasted
“Oh yeah?” PJ decided she sounded really interested
“Yeah!” He carried on “I don’t do much driving, I’m the son of the king, you know” He said, trying to impress her.
She mumbled at him, and PJ felt hurt at her lack of attention. “I’ve not even got a driving license” He continued “But I’m amazing at everything I do, so I thought it wouldn’t matter. I drive taxi’s all of the time”
“You mean, you don’t know how to drive.” She said, suddenly sitting up.
“Of course I know how to drive” He replied. “I’m also amazing at it” He added.
“...” She was stunned.
“Look, No hands!” he said to her while taking his hands off of the steering wheel.
She jumped up behind him “No!” She yelled.
“Fine” PJ said and put his hands back on the wheel. “But…” He added.
“What.” She snapped.
“No eyes or hands!” He said, and closed his eyes and took his hands off of the wheel again.”
The woman screamed.
“It’s fine, honestly” PJ said as the car drove straight into a large tree.
She was thrown forwards as she wasn’t wearing her seatbelt. Her body smashed through the glass and she rolled down the bonnet of the car until falling on to the cold earth.
“Not again” PJ groaned and swiftly ran away from the car before it exploded.
He decided to get the bus to the castle, as he thought he wasn’t having a good day with driving.
Getting on the bus he noticed that there was hardly anyone on it so he sat down and waited for his stop.
The bus started to fill and when there was only one seat left a man got on. He sat next to a woman who looked like she had everything.
The woman was leafing through catalogues and glancing at the pages. She stopped somewhere near the end of one and called a number on he phone she picked out of her designer handbag.
“Panny?” She said rather loudly
“Can you order me the whole thing?” She said, it was a question but more of a demand,
“I know I’ve already got most of it but it doesn’t matter” She said
The woman clicked the phone shut without saying goodbye to the person on the other end. She put it back in her handbag
The bus stopped and both the man and woman got off.
The next stop was PJ’s and he got off and walked the rest of the way to the castle. In this area people knew him and bowed as he walked past. PJ liked that.
After getting into the castle PJ went to go see his father. He was ill and hadn’t been able to leave his room for weeks. He had to wait outside while his fathers ‘friend’ talked to the king, PJ really disliked this friend and thought he was poisoning his fathers mind. The door swung open and he walked out. He saw PJ and nodded his head towards him.
“PJ” He said.
“Ennui” PJ spat back at him. Ennui looked like he was going to say something back to PJ but he turned and walked off, leaving PJ to run into his fathers room.
“’Afternoon father” He said “Sorry about disturbing you earlier. “
“It’s okay Philip. I should have really got a car sent for you” The king replied. “But Ennui thinks it’s best if you make your own way”
“He would” PJ complained.
“Why?” The kind said, moving slightly.
“Because he hates me, that’s why. He hates me and is poisoning your mind” PJ said.
“Of course he’s not”
“He is”
“He isn’t and I don’t want to argue anymore. Go practice your fencing, from what I hear you need all the practice you can get”
“I do not. I’m amazing” PJ said back and walked out of the room.
“’Bye father” He said, waving.
He walked down the stairs to go practice. “I don’t need practice, I’ll show him.” he grumbled.
He changed his clothes, but didn’t put on his mask. He picked an opponent and started to fight.
The other man was much stronger than PJ, much faster too. Within minutes he had PJ pinned on the floor. He picked a larger, sharper sword out of his jacket and put it over PJ neck.
He took his mask off and looked at PJ.
“Ennui will be pleased” He said and before PJ could say anything he plunged the sword through PJ’s neck.
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Antenora
Detriment Deleter
Fiendish Philologist
Put down that harpoon gun, in the name of these wonderful birds!
Posts: 15,891
Likes: 113
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Post by Antenora on Sept 25, 2005 10:04:32 GMT -5
Wonderful story. *applauds* This series has been great.
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Post by Dante on Sept 25, 2005 14:20:56 GMT -5
I'm sorry I missed this for so many hours. This is a great last chapter. I love the way you've tied everything together. *joins in the applause*
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Post by Ennui on Sept 25, 2005 15:06:43 GMT -5
Aha! So I got vengeance as well as comeuppance. Good to see you, Amber...virtually...I had a bizarre nightmare about you, will e-mail...
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Post by SF on Sept 25, 2005 15:32:54 GMT -5
Yessss, thank you so much for finishing this Amber. Nicely done, I love how PJ thinks he's so amazing.
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Post by PJ on Sept 25, 2005 19:02:03 GMT -5
Yessss, thank you so much for finishing this Amber. Nicely done, I love how PJ thinks he's so amazing. Thinks? My dear snicketface, PJ IS amazing! And one day, Ennui, one day..... *shakes fist* But yeah, Amber, this was great. I loved my taxi antics. "NO HANDS AND NO EYES" is the BEST quote EVAR.
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Post by s on Sept 30, 2005 18:48:31 GMT -5
The only bad thing about this is that fact that it's over now.
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Post by Linda Rhaldeen on Jan 3, 2006 14:16:05 GMT -5
I can't believe I didn't read this earlier. It's wonderful, and even though it's several months old deserves to be on the front page so I'm posting to bump it. I really liked the way all the stories were tied together, and I especially liked Wrath and Pride.
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Post by Erik on Jan 4, 2006 17:46:47 GMT -5
Amber, you should become a professional author. You obviously have the talent and creativity.
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