Post by Akbar Le Grey on Jan 15, 2006 3:45:49 GMT -5
Editor : Akbar/Le Grey.
Columnists: PJ, Linda, A., Jemima, Curio, Sora and Grace.
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PJ’s Rant.
{PJ was unable to write an article for this week’s edition}
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Jemima’s Unadvice Column.
Jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeemmmmmmy.
Hi.
So guess what?
My sister went on a trip and she took my toothpaste and some of my random crap that I use all the time!
And I don't have any money to replace them!
Travesty, isn't it?
WHAT SHOULD I DO!?!
<3 Deanna.
Dear Deanna, <3
My sister once took my really good brush that I was using when she went back to college. I was mad, too. Replace your random crap with other random crap-ish things. Or beg your parents for money while you truthfully blame your sister. But replacing your random stuff will be funner.er.
From,
Jemmy!
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Dearest Jemmy,
667ers don't like me. What should I do?
Most sincerely,
Orangey
Yo, Orangey, what do you mean?
Of course we like you. You're awesomely awesome. You have a 12 on your karma. Though I have a 13, you're still cool, I think I contributed 2 or 3 of them to you.
Anyway...
You're neat. So if you're neat, and if you still think 667ers don't like you, post neat stuff. Like yo urvoice. Or spam. Spam might make you be hated more, but you'll get recognized.
Yup. That's all.
Jemmy Jem Jem Joo Jemima
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Dear Jemima,
I need to write a comedy routine for the school talent show, because I lost a bet. Long story. But I can't think of any material. And besides that, I think my ability to rap disappeared. Help?
-Robert
Dear Roberto,
Talent show. Bet. Comedy. Rap. These don't go together. Take out the bet and the comedy, and you're good. Or take out the talent show and the rap and you're fine. Still, those words do not work well together.
All right then, you have to write a comedy skit for a talent show because you lost a bet to, I bet, someone younger than you. Eh? No? Okay then...
Copy a skit off of Saturday Night Live. Or just have a fully loaded slapstick comedy routine. Hit people with pies. Call on someone from the audience, which would be a teacher, and set up a trap that would have the teachers getting harmlessly hurt. Ha ha!
Laugh your socks off,
Jemima
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Please send your problems to Jemima!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Due to family problems Jemima's How To will be published this week
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Reading Into It Too Much?
Grace will be replacing Sixteen as our aSoUE correspondent for a couple of weeks.
It's been speculated for a while now that maybe we're being a bit obsessive and reading just a taaad too much into it. Some threads are made (even by me) that really are just overdoing it. That's part of the mystery of the series, maybe actually the most confusing part: Is it just a funny thing Snicket/Handler added or crucial?
Some examples are (and this includes frivolous threads):
-Is Sir a woman?
-Is Mr. Poe a woman?
-Are Sir and Charles lovers?
Etc., etc.
Do these things really matter? Are they vital to the series? Will they help the Baudelaires/us solve the mysteries of it?
Another topic:
There are many plotholes and inconsistencies now in the series now, and Handler must be getting worried. It's also been thought that maybe he did it on purpose, just to confuse us. And yet another thought for you guys: Will we ever find out, or fill the plotholes? Just part of the elaborate mystery Handler weaves.
-Grace.
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Linda’s Interview Of The Week.[/u]
Linda: Welcome to Member Interview of the Week. This week (well, actually a while ago) I interviewed Greysnicket. Before it gets started, I’d like to thank Greysnicket for being helpful and patient. Now, what is your real name?
Greysnicket: My real name is Brent Alan Bennett.
Linda: How did you come up with your username?
Greysnicket: I like to mimic authors as much as possible when I fan-fic, so I came up with a name that I liked. I've also got a Beatrice ^_^ (I love you Gretchen!)
Linda: Do you find the members of 667 to be nice people?
Greysnicket: Yeah, you guys are the best! This is the friendliest site I've ever been on.
Linda: What do you feel your level of popularity is?
Greysnicket: I think the people who know me like me, but most people don't know me.
Linda: Is anyone rude to you?
Greysnicket: None, Other than Mr. Poe... (Oh, how I loathe him)
Linda: Were you ever a lurker?
Greysnicket: Were YOU a lurker? ^_^ Yeah I was
Linda: How did you find out about 667?
Greysnicket: I don't remember... I think it was a link page on TQW...
Linda: About how much time do you spend on 667?
Greysnicket: I spend quite a bit of time on it
Linda: How important is 667 in your life?
Greysnicket: Very, because I met one of the most important people in my life here...
Linda: What sections do you visit the most? What are your favourite threads?
Greysnicket: Disturbing Discussion! True or False to the MAXX, and The real life ASoUE coincidence thread.
Linda: Do you feel like the majority of the members know who you are?
Greysnicket: No, I feel I'm relatively unknown...
Linda: Tell us a bit about yourself. What are some of your interests?
Greysnicket: I enjoy anime and manga, I read ASoUE & I draw and write as well. I've also just got into creating e-dolls.
Linda: How would you describe your appearance?
Greysnicket: I'm about 5'11'' and 225 lbs. (But I've been told I look like I weigh 150. So I'm not extremely fat ^_^) I'm white, I wear glasses, I have brown spiky hair, and I almost always have something green on!
Linda: How would you describe your personality?
Greysnicket: I feel that I am very easy to get along with. I like to laugh! I enjoy helping people with their problems. So if any of you have problems, please tell me!
Linda: Where are you from?
Greysnicket: I am from Eastaboga, Alabama! (Yes, it's a real place...) The reason I say that is my mom worked at a gas station, and somebody thought the Eastaboga city limits sign was a joke... ^_^
Linda: Is there anything you’d like to tell the members of 667 while you’re in the spotlight?
Greysnicket: Remember to live by my quote! "Too often, we lose sight of life's simple pleasures. Remember, when somebody annoys you, it takes 42 muscles to frown, BUT, it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and b**-slap the mf*** upside the head" Good Night everybody!
Linda: Thanks Greysnicket. Now, I wrote this many days in advance, so the situation’s probably changed by now, but as of 12/26 I have no one to interview. Hopefully people responded last week and asked to be interviewed, though. So just a reminder to please contact me if you would like to be interviewed.
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"George returns with some shameless 667BB advertising"
667 BIG BROTHER THREE
667 Big Brother is back, and is planning to be the most exciting, the most energetic, and of course the most evil yet, with thirteen new housemates, some new sections, and some brand new twists already brewing inside the house. And in Dupin’s first article in the 667er for a while, you’ll be reading some new information about the tasks, the housemates, and of course, the third 667 Big Brother house.
The link of the forum is kept secret until one or two days before the 667 Big Brother starting date, which is the 20th of January, but I can confirm the color scheme is not as annoying as the blinding yellow of 667BB1, and the irritating black and white of 667BB2. The color scheme is a combination of blues and blacks, and pretty on the eyes. The banner this year is made by the Quiet World admin, Michael.
The housemates are made up from seven female members and six male members. Three moderators are in the house, and so is an admin of a forum known very well to 667. Rumors have circulated about Mr Poe going into the house, and so have ones that Snicket has been going into the house, and so have J and Deanna. The housemates will all be announced later in the week, but for the readers of the 667er, I’ll let you in on three members that will become housemates for the duration of 667BB.
Melissa, better known as Freshie is going to be a housemate.
So is Luis, better known as Ron Weasley.
The final sneak preview is Snicket Face, who is one of three moderators.
667 Big Brother Three lasts for up to eleven weeks, with a housemate leaving on the Friday of every week. Each week, whilst taking part in tasks, the housemates must nominate two fellow housemates to put up for eviction. The two or more housemates with the most nominations face the vote from the rest of 667 to find out who will be evicted.
All the latest news about it will be posted in the ‘667 Big Brother Three’ thread in MM from when it starts, to when it finishes, so make sure you read it and get your votes in each week! Thanks for reading.
-Dupin.
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A. Investigates.
Karma Police.
A new function, a new privilege, a new responsibility? With the introduction of the new Karma feature many fear the downfall of the board. Are smitewars inevitable? Will it just become another popularity contest? Does karma actually mean anything? Many have suggested giving the feature to Mods only, but as a fun feature, that seems to take all the fun out of it. Besides, really cool member smitewars would make great primetime entertainment. Popularity contests are fun. And everyone just loves having new things to play around with. You ask what the actual purpose of these things is, well then you’re right by saying it has absolutely no point at all and that’s why to show you’re support for the pointlessness of Karma, everyone should just exalt this reporter. This petition of sorts, will once and for all prove that karma serves no purpose and the reporter will have lots of pointless karma. Win, win. Purpose or not, it sure is fun to have a lot of Karma.
-A.
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The 667er Games, by Curio
Last time there was a sentence to decode:
IO ZITKT! IGV QKT NGX?
The key to decoding this is relatively simple. Your computer keyboard. Matching the typical QWERTY layout of your keyboard with the typical English alphabet, we have:
A = Q
B = W
C = E
D = R
E = T
F= Y
G = U
H = I
I = O
J = P
K = A
L = S
M = D
N = F
O = G
P = H
Q = J
R = K
S = L
T = Z
U = X
V = C
W = V
X = B
Y = N
Z = M
And so IO ZITKT! IGV QKT NGX? becomes HI THERE! HOW ARE YOU?
A TEDIOUS CONVERSATION WITH MYSELF
Yes, this is tedious. I apologize, but I was having difficulty coming up with ideas, and, well, this is what happens. Please send me a PM with your results anyway, the username is doom. I might just make this into a codes column...
(PHONE RINGS)
C: Happy to get it!
C: You are?
C: I'm being cheerfulbecause of the holidays.
C: Erm. What?
C: Shut up.
C: Okay.
C: Yeah, I'm sure everyone is really interested in this.
C: Yeah.
(PHONE RINGS)
C: I don't think having these kinds of conversations with oneself is entirely healthy.
C: No, probably not.
(PHONE STOPS RINGING)
-Curio.
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