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Post by Jacques Snicket on Dec 16, 2006 22:13:38 GMT -5
Olaf: Well, well, well. It seems we have finally gotten ahold of Lemony Snicket. We captured him in roughly one minute we barged in the place. Fernald: I find that hard to believe, Olaf. Olaf: Would you believe five minutes? Fernald: I highly doubt that, boss. Olaf: How about ten minutes? Fernald:
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Dec 2, 2006 21:37:26 GMT -5
Olaf: No, I am not a pyromaniac, you twit! Mr. Poe: Hmmph! You were never a really good actor anyway, Count Olaf. Olaf: My name is Stephano you idiot! Mr. Poe: No it is not! Come with me, Count Olaf, where I will arrest you! Olaf: Nooooooo!!!! I want my maaammmmaaaaaaaa!!!!
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Nov 28, 2006 18:33:55 GMT -5
Olaf: Who are you anyway, a unicorn? Giuseppe Verdi: I am not a unicorn! I am an operatic composer, like the guy in the Hotel Manager suit said! Olaf: What are you talking about, unicorn? Verdi: WHAT?! I AM NOT A UNICORN!!! Dewey Denouement: La Forza del Destino…[gets harpooned]*gasp* I am dead now. Oh yeah, I lied about the Baudelaires being safe again…I…I had to tell Olaf…[dies] Just then, his bowels are released, and the whole place smells now. Cartman: You see Kyle? Everybody craps their pants when they die! Now hand over another 20!
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Nov 12, 2006 10:54:48 GMT -5
Lemony Snicket: And thus the three Baudelaire orphans died in misery and despair. THE END!!!!! Violet: What!? We're not dead! WE DO NOT DIE IN THE END! Lemony Snicket: What? My ending too cheerful for you? Alright, fine! Here's a more depressing ending, "And thus the Baudelaires found their parents who were indeed alive, and Count Olaf gave them rock candy." THE END!!!!! I'M DONE HERE!!! THIS IS IT!!! YOU NEVER LIKED MY ENDINGS!!! NEVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'LL NEVER WRITE THESE BOOKS AGAIN!!!!!!!! I HOPE YOU ALL DIE A TRAGIC DEATH WITHOUT MY ASSISTANCE!!!!
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Nov 7, 2006 20:17:51 GMT -5
Olaf: It's a beautiful morning! Woohoo! Klaus: Why are you so happy all of a sudden? Olaf: Because I was in love with your mother. Klaus: WHAT?! (proceeds to kick Olaf where it hurts) Violet (passes by): Awkward… Sunny:
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Nov 5, 2006 14:21:42 GMT -5
Olaf: Now, orphans. I want to ask something of you. Where are my cheesey poofs? Violet: We do not know Count Olaf. Olaf: I WANT MY CHEESEY POOFS! Hey! (sees cat eating his cheesey poofs) Olaf: No, kitty! They're MY cheesey poofs! Baudelaires:
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Oct 12, 2006 16:57:00 GMT -5
What could have been in The End:
Lemony Snicket: The End has come… Violet: It will not be our end but his! (Olaf's) Count Olaf: Silence, orphan! It is The End because it is the title of the book we happen to be in. Ha! Lemony Snicket: That's it. (writes Olaf being tied onto a pole with rope, and is immolated…alive.) That’ll teach you to contradict the greatest author of all time. Klaus: Yes! Olaf à la king! Baudelaires: Let's eat! Random Guy: You're all just a bunch of cannibals! I hate you!
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Sept 24, 2006 17:58:39 GMT -5
Lemony Snicket , the Baudelaires, and Count Olaf are in a graveyard, and:
Olaf: A writer, three orphans, and an arsonist walk into a cemetery… Lemony Snicket: If this isn’t a start up for a really bad joke, I don’t know what is. Olaf: Come on, I’m just trying to— Olaf’s head is lopped off by a flying iron beem. Snicket: Wait!…You haven’t told me the punch line!… V. Baudelaire: Well, this has been an uneventful day, hasn’t it Klaus? K. Baudelaire: Yes, it isn’t, I mean, it is… The Baudelaires run off, narrowly missing the flying iron beem that comes again to lop Snicket’s head off.
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Sept 12, 2006 18:53:56 GMT -5
Klaus: Look at this word! It's "Ramification." Violet: What does it mean? Klaus: The process of being transformed into a ram or sheep. Lemony Snicket: No it's not! It means the consequence of an action taken! Klaus: Since when did you go to grammar school? Lemony Snicket: Yes I did– Klaus: That was a rhetorical question! Lemony Snicket: I know– Klaus: Have you ever taken any "Remedial Rhetorics" Classes? Lemony Snicket: I don't know! All I ever wanted to be was an actor!!! I want my mommy!!! *Runs off and cries* Violet: , Klaus: ,
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Mar 15, 2008 9:01:43 GMT -5
I prefer just being holed up alone with my books (when I have time to my musings).
As my physical self is stationary, my mind is not.
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Jan 13, 2008 11:02:32 GMT -5
I've been here since December 2005.
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Dec 23, 2007 9:44:01 GMT -5
Happy Birthday, Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year!
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Dec 23, 2007 9:45:08 GMT -5
I am also getting The Tragic Treasury as well.
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Dec 22, 2007 10:46:18 GMT -5
I'm getting soundtracks (e.g. The Fellowship of the Ring Complete Recordings, Sweeney Todd Deluxe Edition Soundtrack, Chamber of Secrets Soundtrack, Da Vinci Code Soundtrack), books (e.g. the Complete Works of Shakespeare, Communist Manifesto, Canterbury Tales, The Three Musketeers, among others). I also got an early Christmas present: Adobe Photoshop CS3 Extended.
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Dec 10, 2007 0:13:27 GMT -5
We all shine on, like the moon, and the stars, and the sun. We all shine on…!
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