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Post by Jacques Snicket on Feb 15, 2006 20:00:13 GMT -5
I hope you will stay, too.
Signed, Quinn the Alchemist
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Dec 10, 2005 12:43:55 GMT -5
Hope you have a good time here.
Signed,
Paul McCartney & Wings
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Dec 5, 2005 20:23:31 GMT -5
Welcome to 667 Dark Avenue. Hope you have a pleasant time here. Mind the dark lighting, the various poisonous items that may have been left here by Count O--*starts coughing*.....
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Dec 5, 2005 22:25:10 GMT -5
Was that the Sebald Code?
Edit:
Sebald Code, right?
I welcome You friends but watch. out. the enemy and in
PS: May I post your message here?
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Dec 6, 2005 19:19:15 GMT -5
Welcome to Count Olaf's---I mean, welcome to 667 Dark Avenue!!!!!!
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Dec 6, 2005 19:23:47 GMT -5
Welcome back!!!!
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Dec 5, 2005 23:48:02 GMT -5
I am Count Olaf. Welcome to 667 Dark Avenue.
*SLOGAN: "Join Count Olaf's glamorous theatre troupe. OR ELSE!! lol.
Vote Olaf: President of All Actors and Related Stuff Like That."
Hope ya have a good time here.
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Dec 6, 2005 19:22:37 GMT -5
The Duke of Winnipeg bids you farewell. *bows*
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Dec 5, 2005 20:16:58 GMT -5
Thank you. *"The Little Snicket Lad" abruptly stops, and a loudspeaker sounds through the theatre, "Attention. THIS IS --(static)-- I have turned on this loudspeaker for one reason only! Count Olaf is a fraud. I--- AAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! DON'T KILL ME! NOOOOO!!!!!! I DIDN'T MEAN ANY OF THE THINGS I SAID ABOUT HIM!!!!! I HAD NO IDEA OF WHAT I WAS SAYING!!!!!! I WAS THREATENED BY A MAN WITH BEARD BUT NO HAIR AND A WOMAN WITH HAIR BUT NO BEARD!!!! THEY MADE ME DO IT!!!!! NOOOOOOOO!!!!!! MOMMMY!!!!!!" (sounds of a scuffle are heard from the loudspeaker as the audience listens with shock as a piercing scream comes from the speaker). An official looking man [Mr. Poe] jumped onto staged and announced, "Our actors have been healed finally after that, well, thing, I was taking care of back at the audio studio where the loudspeaker controls are located. Umm, good-bye..." He jumps off stage as the play resumes, but what the audience didn't know, one of the actors had a walkie-talkie. And the actor was talking into it: "Yes? Yes? Okay, I already KNOW, you---" an explosion is heard, and he falls down. Another important-looking man with a bazooka behind the fallen man says to the audience, "I am terribly sorry about this; but one of the actors was contacting a clown to be invited at a birthday party, but in theatres such as this one, we cannot allow that, so---" the man is electricuted by a tazer as he faints onto the ground unconscious* I come up to the stage. "Yes, it was ME with that tazer. I just wanted to check his pockets, you see, because right now he is having a mid-afternoon nap, due to the electrical surge the went through him. Knocked him out cold..." *checks pockets* Hmmm, five bucks and a Twizzler's bar... Oh well, that's life.... "The play shall resume, I-I mean the intermission....." The song of "Giligan's Island" comes up and when the audience is nearly singing to it, the tape recordist realizes he made a mistake and puts in "Row, row, row your boat" and realizes that that was a mistake, too. He put on, "The Little Snicket Lad." EDIT: "I apologize for the silly style of my little story here, and yes, the part with the loudspeaker and the tazer and all that stuff was a little quirky. I hope you will all understand. With all due respect, volunteer13. PS: DON'T YOU THINK THAT WAS FUNNY??
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Dec 4, 2005 22:08:59 GMT -5
And now for the intermission, which is the time when our actors receive medical attention. The play will be on again in, say, a few days. *as intermission begins, the song "The Little Snicket Lad" grows louder and louder, when Al Funcoot (Count Olaf) cries out in apparent pain and covers his ears.*
Al Funcoot (Count Olaf): "Ahhh! My ears are burning. Noooooo!!!!!"
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Dec 4, 2005 11:18:32 GMT -5
Thank you! Thank you! I am happy to announce that the play is about to begin *cut to opening scene of "La Forza del Destino"*.
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Dec 4, 2005 2:04:46 GMT -5
Thank you, guys. Oh, by the way, nice signature, lauren & esmeralda.
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Dec 3, 2005 16:55:57 GMT -5
I am the great, and magnificant, Volunteer13!!!!! *fireworks explode all around me and band plays pomp and circumstance*
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Post by Jacques Snicket on Dec 8, 2005 14:47:09 GMT -5
B--
I know that time is short and that my associates are either being hunted down and kidnapped and/or killed, I feel that it is necessary to list the names and/or initials of the surviving members of our organization:
(second half of letter torn off)
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