Post by Linda Rhaldeen on May 21, 2017 21:56:52 GMT -5
Linda here to present Best Profile Decoration. It totally makes sense that I would be presenting this award considering how much I care about people's profiles (when on Tapatalk I don't even see them) and how much thought and effort I put into my own profile (and by that, I mean, I have had the same avatar for years ). This year we had six nominees:
Pen, whose profile dives into the surreal with eyes and taxidermy foxes, among other things
Lemona, who is currently posing as a fishmonger totally-not-a-children's-book-author-in-disguise
Unfortunately, none of you lousy 667ers voted for them. Which is weird because I thought I had voted for Pen myself, so now I'm not sure if my memory is playing tricks or if my vote had somehow not tallied (and if not, how many other categories did this happen in? ). Luckily, there are more.
Pepper, everyone's favorite 6-year-old and known for this ground-meat-and-peppermint-hard-candy combo avatar.
Terry Craig who loves to change his name to go along with his profile thing (currently a Pterosaur, previously known as the ubiquitous Poe's Tattoo's a Potato)
These two each received one vote. Again, sad. 667ers have no taste in art.
Next we have Bear, known for naked fat babies and ursine animals in his avatar and who currently has some sort of woman with a building on her head, received four votes.
Finally, we come to the winner. With nine votes, this shows that you can win even while keeping your avatar mostly the same, if it is clever enough. Congratulations to
Post by Cracky McTeague on May 21, 2017 22:05:56 GMT -5
Yay! Although I would've liked to see a couple more votes for my efforts this past year, I'm glad that the 667er whom I voted for, and hoped would deservedly win, has won -- conga rats, Comet! Keep that profile snazzy for those who do care, like me.
once upon a time there was a group of five starving artist writers living together in a salsaty old haunted apartment in north carolina i guess (it's not really relevant that it's haunted but it's definitely haunted because it's an old building in north carolina). the writers were named willis, linda, tiago, theplague, bear, and pepper, and technically the apartment was only meant for one person but there were two sofa beds crammed in the bedroom and pepper fit in a nest they made for him in the cupboards because he was a tiny child, so it was fine.
one day, pepper burst into the apartment and spiked a folded newspaper at the floor, where tiago was sitting with his work-in-progress novel because they had no desk. "ow," said tiago, who did not deserve that.
"guys!" pepper pointed dramatically at the newspaper. "you've gotta check this out right now! there's huge news!!!!"
"we know how newspapers work, pepper," said theplague. no one was paying attention to pepper because he was a baby, even though he was the greatest writer of his generation. except that willis understood that pepper's wisdom was beyond his years. also bear wasn't paying attention to anything at all except his poem.
"is it news that is relevant to our interests?" asked willis.
"yeah! it's an announcement for a writing contest called Best Writing for unpublished authors in our city, and there's a huge prize!"
everyone was interested now. "that prize is substantial," said tiago, who still had the newspaper folded open to the announcement in his lap (from, you might remember, when it was thrown at him with great force). "do you think we should enter?" he asked his fellow penniless saps.
"uh, yeah, that's why i brought it to all of you?" said pepper.
linda took the paper from tiago and scanned the article. "pepper, are you sure you're old enough to enter? you are basically an infant, after all."
"oh my god," said pepper, "i'm fourteen or something like that, when is this joke going to die!"
"i don't mean to be rude, it's just that your writing still could mature a lot. because you're a fetus."
"that is it!" pepper stormed two steps over to the kitchen and removed all his worldly possessions from his cupboard: three blankets, a phone and charger, and a box of poptarts. "none of you take me seriously and i'm sick of it, you won't even give me a chance! i'm moving to melbourne to be the youngest tv and film writer in australia and you can all stay here foraging in the park for edible roots because your fanfics don't pay for groceries!"
he made it out the front door of the building before he heard a voice behind him yell out "pepper, wait!" he turned around. it was willis.
"pepper..." willis put a hand on his shoulder once he caught up and looked at him seriously. "i paid for half of those poptarts."
"i'm sorry, willis," pepper said sadly as he opened the box and offered it to him. "i forgot in my overwhelming rage."
"it's fine, no harm no foul." willis took half of the poptarts, opening one of the packets to remove a single toaster pastry, since there's an uneven number of those sleeve thingies for some reason. "and hey, listen, the world's just not ready for you yet, buddy. giraffe neck tail whatever is gonna change pop culture forever."
pepper smiled. "thanks, willis. i hope you win the contest."
willis took a bite of his poptart as he made his way back inside. by the time he returned to the apartment, tiago had already ran downstairs to put the contest entries of himself, theplague, and linda in the mail. "you could've sent my default contest entry too, asshole," said willis, throwing his half-eaten poptart and hitting tiago in the face.
"ok, actually, you know what?" tiago stood up. "pepper had the right idea. i hate living here. all you guys do is throw things at me. i'll send for my things. let me know if i win the contest." he picked up his notebook and ran out the door, slamming it behind him.
bear looked up from proofreading his poem at the noise. "hey, where's pepper?"
while linda explained the dramatic events of the past six minutes to bear, willis copied down the address from the contest announcement onto two envelopes. when bear was done going through several of the stages of grief, willis put bear's poem into one of the envelopes and his own entry into another, and set out to put them into the mailbox with the others.
"hey, willis?" said theplague. "mind if i tag along?" he didn't, so they walked down to the mailboxes together in silence. willis offered theplague a poptart.
"so, uh, kinda wild in that apartment lately, huh?" theplague laughed nervously. willis was too polite to answer verbally with a mouthful of poptart, so he just nodded. theplague glanced upwards towards the apartment and whispered "...i fear for my life every day there."
willis gasped and his poptart fell out of his mouth. "me too! i'm 80% sure i saw bear standing over my bed holding a knife last tuesday night."
theplague looked relieved at willis's also living in extreme terror. "yeah. i envy pepper and tiago, honestly." willis nodded. the two looked at each other. they looked at the door to the building. they looked at each other again. they knew what they had to do.
six weeks later, bear and linda had long since realized the last of their former roommates were gone. bear slept in pepper's old cupboard and cried himself to sleep every night. linda pushed the sofa beds together and blasted the hamilton soundtrack all day every day until bear broke her computer. somehow they weren't evicted despite having no money?
finally, it was the day that the contest results would be announced.
"what did you send in, again?" asked linda.
"a clever poem, you?"
"musical theater but it's my friends."
bear looked from his phone, where they were watching the contest's twitter page for the results, since linda's computer was broken. "is that like your thing now?"
"pretty much," said linda. according to the time, the contest results would be posted any second now. "refresh the page."
"i was already going to but now i'm going to wait."
"seriously?" linda snatched his phone and refreshed the page herself. they both held their breath as the page loaded. the winner had been posted, and it was...
"yes!" linda threw bear's phone out the window in her glee. "goodbye, poverty, hello, fresh produce!"
"you broke my phone!" cried bear. he was not having a great day.
"i'll buy you a new one! as soon as i go see hamilton again--"
bear jumped out the window after his phone. he soon moved to a national forest where he spent the rest of his life happily terrifying campers while wearing a realistic bear costume.
pepper did go on to become the youngest tv and film writer in australia. he won an academy award at 19, and after he thanked willis in his acceptance speech for always believing in him, willis made contact for the first time in years. pepper made willis a writer on his top show, and they were buddies and went to concerts and stuff their whole lives.
i don't know much about tiago and theplague so pretend this is a description of them finding contentment and success.
and as for linda, well... she did indeedwatch hamilton again.
pepper received 0 votes for writing corner with the fresh mince (😭😭😭) Tiago James Squalor received 1 vote for The Ravenous Restaurant theplague received 2 votes for The Luckiest Kids in the World Part 2 Willis (did he create a new account yet) received 2 votes for The Dark Games: Catching Dark Reba received 4 votes for The Confessions Of Todd: To 667 He Is God! Linda Rhaldeen received 7 votes for The Dark Avenue Picture Show, making her the winner
congrats to linda, and to the rest of the nominees! u write good
Now, compassion is defined as "feeling or showing sympathy and concern for others", but I think that sympathy and empathy can get mixed up sometimes. The former means "feeling compassion, sorrow, or pity for the hardships that another person encounters", as in: "You have my sympathies for having lost your pet today, I hope you'll feel better soon"; The latter means a more general "putting yourself in the shoes of another", as, possibly, in: "I see you've expressed some genuine emotion just now -- stop that, it's ruining everything!"
Here in the Darkies this year, I think 'Most Compassionate' is supposed to include both sympathy and empathy, which is why the winner is none other than
My name is Zortegus and I have something to say: the Darkies suck this year.
Anyway. This year, I have the honor of presenting the "Best New Member" award. When it comes to "Best New Member", there are many reasons that may be fundamental in every person's final decision: who's the nicest new member? Who's the funniest? Who's the one that became a necessary part of the group? Who's been collaborating the most with the forum? Who's most attractive? It's clear I won last year because I reunite all those conditions, but sadly I can't get this award for a second time.
This year we had only two candidates: one of them is an extraordinary human being, particularly interesting and fun, who quickly became part of this beautiful family and even though we didn't see them, I bet they're really attractive too. The other... well, the other is just Trip.
It is my sad duty to announce our dear jim got 5 votes against trip 's 13 (that's probably a hoax, since she's the admin du-uh), but he's the king of our hearts and we all know this competition is rigged so WHO CARES! I'm outta here bye.
...Nah I'm just kidding and following my frenemy thing with Trip.
Seriously talking (or writing), congratulations Trip for winning. Practically since you registered you became so close and important to most of us, you proved to be an amazing friend and user, you even won Big Brother though nobody really knew who you were! Your dedication helped you to become the respected and useful admin of this community. You deserve this award and many more, especially those that include money or cars with them and not just a digital banner. I love you <3
I also want to congratulate Quisby; if it weren't because you competed against Trip, I'm sure you'd have win this easily (not only because you'd be the only nominated, but because you'rea true gem for this forum). Thanks for becoming part of the group, sharing art, fun and news to the forum. I personally hope to see you in 667 Dark Avenue Big Brother this year; that's 667 Dark Avenue Big Brother *wink to the camera*
Last Edit: May 22, 2017 0:00:13 GMT -5 by Geru Tosz
Oh, I say. I have always thought of Most Compassionate as the most valuable of all awards, and I am overwhelmed by your kindness in awarding it to me.
Congratulations to my worthy co-winner, Trip.
I am also honoured to be sharing this award with so many distinguished people who have won it in the past, Linda, Betsy, Anka, Sophie, Charlie, Lorelai, and above all the wonderful Emma Squalor, who made this award her own. Emma, we are still thinking of you.
Congrats Comet (who else could it have been?), Linda (who else could it have been?), Trip again (well, it could have been Quisby, who as Zortegus says is very deserving, but when someone becomes admin in their first year here, there can be no doubt they are a worthy winner).
Congratulations, Hermes and Trip! I voted for one of you, but I would have voted for both if I could. Also to Linda, though I would really have been surprised if you hadn't won. And once more to Trip, for being awesome and new, even if you are trying to get me off emotions (but what do I need those for anyway?).
Thanks to everyone who voted for me for Best Profile Decoration! I'm very surprised to have gotten that many votes with such competition. I'm specifically surprised that Terry didn't get any more votes - in my opinion, you deserve it, and I really thought I'd voted for you, but apparently I didn't vote for anyone, which I'm honestly a little embarrassed about now, all things considered. Either way, thanks a lot for the award - I really appreciate it!