Post by Akbar Le Grey on Jul 16, 2006 3:25:57 GMT -5
July 16th - July 23rd.
Editor-in-Chief: Akbar Le Grey.
Sub-editor: Linda*.
Columnists: Une femme auteur anonyme, Jemima*, Sixteen, Snicket*, Sora, Amanda, J., Shruti.
Published by 667er Publications, ltd.
A subsidiary of the 667er Group.
------------------------------------------------------------------
All unattributed parts are by Akbar Le Grey.
I’m sure that, by now, almost every 667er knows what happened this week: huge fight in MM between two of 667’s most powerful groups; swans comes, sides with Char et al; George, Tess and Eoghann leave. And that's it. Yet another MM flamewar. This time, however, Char's side had two extra weapons: Kate and Ann. Not to mention a mascot named Kyle.
So, we now have a 667 without George, twistedbrain and Eoghann. But what should we think of them as? Drama queens or idealists? That’s what this report aims to find out.
WHY’D THEY DO IT? WHAT DO THEY HAVE TO SAY?[/u][/size]
Tess.[/b]
As Tess signed on to MSN, she messaged me asking ‘Are you gonna yell at me too?’. And this, in a question, describes how the people who’ve leaved feel: persecuted and on the defensive. But why did she do it? We all know this MM fiasco blew everything up, or course, but there must have been some other motives there from before, to be blown up.
“I left because 667 is in a decline,” Tess told me, adding that it wasn’t just the actions of the so-called clique that had made her leave, though they did have a part in it: “It's not solely because of any one clique, although they may have contributed.” She’s simply fed up with 667, and decided to leave. However, her need to be defensive becomes evident in another statement: “Too bloody well for anyone who doesn't like it.” When asked specifically about whether or not she feels persecuted about her decision to leave, she replies “No, not really. I mean, people are yelling at me to come back, but I don't let it bother me.” And that, it seems, is that for twistedbrain, as she simply does not intend to return, she tells me. “Not for a long time, if ever.” Her greatest regret? Never becoming a staff member. An admirable, though sadly unfulfilled, aspiration. I guess it’s ‘goodbye’ for Tess, who is well known for being stubborn once she makes a decision. One down, two more to go.
Neither George nor Eoghann were available for comment.[/u]
THE OTHER SIDE[/u][/size]
By J.
It is thirty-seven minutes after midnight in whatever time zone Florida is in, which is the time zone New York is in, which is the time zone New Jersey, where controversial 667er Charlotte “The Harlot” O’Brien resides, is in. The going-on at 667 have apparently not affected her television viewing, as she is eagerly waiting to enter “The Cone Zone”—the state one is in when they watch the comedic stylings of Conan O’Brien (no relation.)
Evidence gathered points to no drug use: The fourteen-year old has not noticed a change in her behavior, nor did the quality of her posts deteriorate. In this reporter’s opinion, her posts have remained consistent since the beginning: silly, pointless and sometimes stupid, but otherwise harmless. “I used to think Char was annoying as hell,” an anonymous 667er states. “But I just learned to grow with it, and now she’s my friend, I think.”
Aside from an aversion to silver and an increased amount of howling at the moon, no interviewee had noticed anything different about Char, who has been proclaimed the most prominent member of “The Clique” by two unnamed sources outside the so-called clique. Members inside the clique, however, said there is no ‘most prominent member’, because there is no clique. In fact, Char does not consider herself a member at all, because there is no clique: “We aren’t really exclusive. No one else has been posting, so they notice my posts more,” Char explains, when asked why she thinks people have been reacting so severely to her posts.
Pandora, engrossed in the uber-dead sexiness of Stephen Colbert and Paul Dinello, could not be reached for further comment.
After the depressing realization that there might not be new footage of the Colbert-Sedaris-Dinello threesome, Pandora opened herself to questioning. The controversy has apparently had an affect on her; she sarcastically expresses how nice it is to discover that people hated her when she thought that no one did. But otherwise, she is unmoved by the people leaving. “They are pretty dramatic. If they want to blame their leaving on me that is up to them but I can’t change their leaving. I really do like Orlando. I think Paul is wearing that black shirt. I do think they’re leaving for stupid reasons.
“If you have anything else to ask me, ask me now. I stop paying attention when they come on.” The interviewee warns, referring to the cast of Strangers with Candy.
“So do I,” the interviewer agrees, apparently on the same mind-link as the interviewee.
Charlotte has also called the departed members of 667 dramatic. “I think they're being drama queens. If they think they're making some huge statement by leaving, they aren't. If they want things to change then they have to do stuff to change it.”
The so-called plastics are almost clueless about why they have caused so much controversy. Undoubtedly, the drama has caused much shock. Char describes herself as exhausted. Pandora describes herself as happy, but only because Stephen Colbert, dressed in a pilgrim’s suit, is dancing with Paul Dinello’s character, an art teacher named Geoffrey Jellineck..
“Damn it!” Pandora curses regretfully. “I should have advertised that Copperhead was hot, and then they might have seen it! I understand why they’re mad,” Pandora says, switching back to the 667 Drama. “I wasn’t doing anything intentional. I’m aware of what they feel now, though. If so many people had a problem, why couldn’t they just PM me? They should have just freaking said so, instead of being so dramatic.”
“You should read Whigfield. I liked the retarded mayor. He was cute.” The reporter advises, before Pandora confirms that she was making sense.
“Any last words?” The reporter offers to her interviewees.
“Some day Patrick Fugit will be my lover,” Char responds dreamily.
“…about the 667 drama.” The reporter clarifies.
“Oh. No.”
However, Pandora had some more profound words to leave 667 with. “Get over it. Stop mageeing. At least stop making fun of people. Also, I love Paul Dinello. I want him to be in more things.”
“He’s pretty,” the reporter says, watching Stephen discuss corporeal punishment on the screen, but also realizing the words could also apply to Paul Dinello.
And there you have it; they haven’t changed at all. They remain as happily aloof as ever. If something major has happened on 667, it doesn’t seem to have affected the people blamed for it at all.
ESSAYS[/u][/size]
FOR[/u]
By Sora.
A clique. By definition it’s a slang term for a group of people interested or involved in the same things, e.g. a writing clique, an art clique, a drama clique. 667 as a whole is a clique of people interested in things to do with ASOUE; and if you were more interested in basketball or polynomials, you wouldn't really fit in.
People, who talk about tampons, or where they live, or even an e-love affair that goes on between them, aren't a clique though. They aren't uber-popular, they aren't uber-geek, and they don't try to separate themselves from the rest of us. Kate, Ann, Char, Pan, Kyle, and all the others involved in the past week's 'situation' were all just people discussing things that interested them, but also things that could interest others. Yes, a few of their conversations seemed solely for them, but if they were, you could do the simple thing and find a thread that suits you. According to the rules, you can post in threads that have been posted in within the last 3-4 months. That means that in MM alone, there are over 100 or so threads to post in.
I'm just going to use me as an example here. Tyler, an older member who has left the forum, has been a topic of late. I often feel left out of those conversations on him, because I knew nothing of him. He talked with other people on 667, people I wasn't really associated with.
Now I could whine, and complain that this conversation was really only available to old Tyler fans, but the easy fool proof way to solve this problem, would be to just find another thread to post in. Kate, Ann, Char, etc. don't post in every thread. In fact most of the threads they do post their 'plastic conversations' are ones that are open ended, such as ‘The Random Fact Thread’, or ‘Feel Free To Post Whatever You Want’. Sure there are ones where their talk may seem off-topic, but those threads are generally the ones that are complaining about something or the ones that usually fall into oblivion within a couple days or so.
What harm is this doing to the public of 667? None are making personal attacks, and if they are I'd love to see a series of examples. If you think that MM is becoming too cluttered with threads that don't fit your liking, go to another board on the site. I think it’s awful that so many members think MM is the ONLY board to post in, when it’s really one of 28 boards available to everyone.
As Swans has said, no-one in the 'group formerly known as the Plastics' has posted spam. Yes, swearing has occurred on occasion but almost everyone here has sworn once or twice. Besides that, nothing they have done is wrong. Dupin calling Ann a grumpy faced a-hole is far worse then anything they have done to him. 667, I think we need to learn to deal with what we have, because, in the real world, you're going to feel left out of a lot more than now, so get used to it.
AGAINST[/u]
By Shruti.
The past few days have been rife with conflict. Factions of warring 667ers irritated each other more than usual; because of this, the departure of many respected members of the forum, such as George, Eoghann, and Twistedbrain, ensued. There’s no use denying it: I was on their side throughout the ordeal. The conflict can be summed up rather quickly – certain people insisted on posting numerous threads in MMisc about the same or similar rather inclusive topics that were irrelevant to the forum as a whole. This angered others, quite rightly, who complained in a lengthy argument that unfortunately ended up getting nowhere. It was mainly due to this futility that these members quit. Their pleas were achieving nothing: they were thus no longer of any use to the forum. Or so they felt, particularly since their arguments were cavalierly dismissed without even serious acknowledgment by the opposing group.
I think it’s a terrible shame that members are made to feel like this. 667 is a community, and while I’m not asking for a “one big happy family” sort of thing – because that’s obviously unattainable – I still think everyone should be able to tolerate one another at the very least. I respect the decision of those who have left, but I think it’s sad that it had to come to that. Yes, MMisc is a section for random nonsense. No, MMisc is not a section for one group of people to dominate with threads hopelessly pertinent to their group alone.
Many a time in the last several days, I’ve felt as though 667 is middle school all over again, what with the all the cattiness and cliquery (yeah, that’s not a word, get over it). And that seems to me to be reason enough for leaving. I mean, I think we can all agree that middle school sucked enough the first time around.
CONCLUSION[/u][/size]
Whatever stand one might take on this issue, the fact remains: we’ve lost 3 members. Sure, we stood up for idealism, the right to post whatever you want in MM. But what matters more, 667? Idealism or real members? George was one of 667’s oldest, most influential, members. Tess managed to make many friends on the board, even in the short time she was here. It is suspected, however, that Eoghann hasn’t really left, but is back in a new guise. Yet more proof for Antenora’s eternal phrase about the magic of 667: “You can log out any time you want, but you can never leave.” How true. People have left many, many times, but, surprise surprise, they’re usually back within a week. All we can do, though, is sit and wait. Whether you call them martyrs or drama queens, the basic fact is that they’re real members, 667ers. And the question we need to ask ourselves now, 667, is this: are we really willing to uphold some stupid MM rights at the cost of losing great 667ers?
- WITH ARTICLES BY AKBAR LE GREY, J., SHRUTI AND SORA.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
SORRY FOR CALLING UNDUE ATTENTION TO CERTAIN PEOPLE AGAIN, BUT IT'S KIND OF MY JOB
The controversies of last week seemed to have cooled down at the beginning of this one. General Lee wasn't bashed much (regardless of whether or not he's really Jacktripper). But then, something suspicious began to happen. Kyle/awpoue, or an impersonator using an old account of his, complained about being excessively mentioned in the 667er, which I'm not sure has happened. I'm not sure if the person resurrecting this apparent old account of Kyle's was indeed the curiously popular member by that name, or someone else entirely. Their typing and demeanor seemed either drunken or n00bish, but maybe Kyle had gone mad from the onslaught of fangirls wanting him to shave his legs in front of a webcam or something. Predictably, though, I suspected Klaus19, making what is surely her poorest attempt at popularity yet. And I was right.
I HOPE THIS BIT ISN'T AN IN-JOKE
...Because, a recent gripe around here (clearly one of those specific ones disguised as a general complaint, but not totally unjustified) was that the forum is indeed too in-jokey. I must agree with these sentiments-- I tend to formulate really bad conspiracy theories when looking at much of MMisc. For instance, I have trouble telling if a pair of people arguing are currently bitter enemies, as they may have been in the past, or merely playing around. This happened when the mysterious Klaus19-pretending-to-be-Kyle was apparently mistaken by the real Kyle by Charlotte and J, unless they were merely playing along with him/her as they seemed to be playing along with each other in some faked heated argument (half of it paraphrased from Euro's "leaving" thread) about facial tissues. No doubt there's some kind of secret cabal here, with connections to the Priory of Sion, the Masons, and several fast-food franchises. All this unclear weirdness gives me something to write about, I suppose, even if I can't claim to understand it.
COMPLAINTS DON'T DO ANYTHING...
I just felt I should say that, though I know full well that this complaint isn't going to be helpful. Sadly, too many of our members squander time on flaming each other for making useless posts, and then for making useless posts complaining about said supposedly useless posts, and so on out. Some-- whom Dupin curiously referred to as the Plastics-- decided to make useless posts apparently to spite the complainers, rather than for any more benign and self-entertaining purpose like they were presumably doing before. I suppose that everyone has a right to tell people off for excessive nonsensical chatter and clique-ish behavior, but perhaps it's best just to disregard uninteresting threads entirely and bump the threads one really enjoys from behind all the stuff about some fellow who reads girl's magazines and shaves his legs in front of a webcam. And from behind the Klaus19 flamewars, even if those have a certain appeal to some.
...EXCEPT CAUSE THE FOLLOWING
In the thriving flamewar that ensued from the harsh comments on the state of MMisc, complaints about members who don't even seem to post anymore got dredged up, to the confusion of both new members and old ones who had conveniently missed out on that. But at last, Dupin managed to put the kibosh, whatever exactly a kibosh is, on both the flamewars and the junk that provoked them. By this time, it looked like the original topic had been forgotten anyway, and everyone just wanted to flame each other. But by now, things are perhaps as close to resolved as they'll ever be, and MMisc is a slightly less interesting and rule breaking heap of random banter, minus Dupin. I'm rather saddened by his decision to go out with a metaphorical bang, taking one last swipe at the so-called Plastics-- he was a fairly good moderator. We'll all miss him, and it seems his position is now up for grabs. Skeleton Key seems like a promising candidate, in my opinion, as she frequents the section and did so before the mod position was vacated.
I KNOW YOUR SECRET IDENTITY -- YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE!
As usual, I feel a strange urge to guess the identities of every newcomer who happens to wander by. This Tchock fellow who's been criticizing the great blathering cliques of MMisc-- I rather suspect, as do others,(but I guessed it before anyone posted it, really I did) that he's just Eggman with a new account. Because Eggman "left", and then actually deleted his account, after being flamed for criticizing that same clique. I wonder if many of the newcomers we see posting in MMisc, and apparently taking interest in the exclusive affairs of older members, are really just older ones with new accounts. Or, again, Eggman, who seems to do things like this every so often. But then there is General Lee, either a newcomer with a decent amount of sense and relative appeal(relative to Klaus19 and Jacktripper, I guess), or a returning older member that everyone knows the true identity of, except of course the lurkers. Overly perceptive apparent lurkers frighten me, when they're not me. Even though, to be fair, General Lee has been clearly wrong on the matters of why people are leaving. Klaus19, surprisingly, wasn't really to blame for it.
A DIGRESSION IN THE STYLE OF STEPHEN COLBERT
Because there seems to be a certain demand for Colbert-themed articles in this paper, I give you The Word:
My kind editor, Akbar Le Grey, sometimes has some rather strange ideas. He thinks of himself as something of an entrepreneur, and certainly as a powerful businessman.
He's constructed quite a media empire, or at least tried to, and has often railed against censorship. Meaning I can say whatever I want about him here and he won't edit it out. But I'll limit myself to discussing his current journalistic endeavor, his new addition to this paper.
He's released a supplementary edition of this newspaper consisting only of factual news columns, no opinion-based articles. It's pretty good, really, or at least accurate. (Sadly, it rather revived arguments that really should be over with.)
I'm just a little dubious of the choice of columnists. I'm sure Dupin, Twistedbrain and Robert are talented, but I'm not sure if they're unbiased. The first two(although Dupin ended up not writing anything), have been greatly involved in all of the recent flamewars, and clearly hold opinions about a number of people here.
The resulting report was considered biased by a few who commented-- oddly, the bias was said to swing against the likes of Dupin and Twistedbrain... So I was thinking, if you want truly fair and balanced journalistic forum coverage, hire a lurker. Someone who doesn't post, who doesn't get involved, who just watches flamewars rather than participates in them. In short, an unbiased observer.
Therefore, in conclusion, I must commend my editor for thinking to give me a columnist position. My hat's off to you, Akbar!
And that's The Word, or at least an imitation thereof.
KLAUS19 TEACHES US A MORAL LESSON, BUT REGRETTABLY APPEARS NOT TO BE GONE
...Which is, to put it briefly: If you're an infamous borderline-spammer obsessed with rape and other squicky things, don't post the usernames of your six or seven different accounts. Or you will get them all deleted. Actually, perhaps a better version of the lesson would be: Don't be obsessed with rape and other squicky things on a message board for a children's book series whose author won't tell you what happened on that mountain ledge. And I should note, on that note, that it was too cold up there for Violet and Quigley to take off any clothing.
DISCLAIM DISCLAIM DISCLAIM
And last, I feel a need to tack on a disclaimer. The above information might be slanted, incomplete, or just plain made up. I admit that though I have observed a lot, a lot can also happen during an absence of a few hours on my part, or in the interval between my submitting this and it being published. So, by the time you read this, our sadly departed Dupin and Twistedbrain might be conspicuously back, and the whole matter might be tidily resolved. Like many of you more frequently vocal members, I do hope for the best.
-Une femme auteur anonyme.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
THE WORD: 667ER EDITION[/u]
by J.
J: Hello, and welcome to the first, and probably last, The Word: 667er Edition, by someone who is not Stephen Colbert. It is, in fact, me, J, and my daemon, Captiosus, will be acting as The Word. I don't know, it just sort of fit.
Now, I could have gone off and written something about my own life, something self-indulgent. But this is supposed to be about you, the Internet citizens. So, for this week's Word, I will be doing something related to the Internet, something that symbolizes and represents the culture of the World Wide Web, and that is Adolf
C: Elizabeth.
J: Hitler. Now, a lot of people know Adolf Hitler as the guy who killed a lot of Jews.
C: But Not Enough. (We're allowed to say this because we're Jewish.)
J: However, there's a lot more to Hitler than the history books teach us. For one, Adolf Hitler was born on April 20th, which makes him a Taurus.
C: Pseudoscience Should Be Taught in Schools.
J: Some traits of a Taurus is that they're patient, reliable and loving.
C: Famous Taureans: Edward R. Murrow, Stephen Colbert, Rudolph Hess, Leonardo Da Vinci, Adolf Hitler, Uma Thurman
They're also good with dancing,
C: The Fuhrer Was a Terrific Dancer.
J: cookery,
C: Great With an Oven.
J: art and architecture.
C: But, Uh, We All Know What Happened With That.
J: As a non-smoking vegetarian, Hitler makes a great role model for the kids. Why not look up to Hitler?
C: We'll Tell You Why...
J: He is very popular through achievement, not through superficial factors like looks or style.
C: ...Or Not.
J: When I hear the sum total of Hitler's life achievements, I think of one thing:
C: Who's a puppy? Who's a widdle puppy?
J: I see a man who set goals and worked hard to achieve them. Sure, he didn't do a *total* cleansing.
C: If He Had, There'd Be No Hollywood.
J: But he gave it his all, and that's all that matters. He never gave up, til the day he mysteriously died.
C: In a Bathroom of a Heart Attack during a Political Trip Around Texas
J: And let us not forget his legacy: his grandson, a 42-year old South Carolinian political pundit named Ted Hitler, who, until an unforgettable episode of The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, was going under the name Stephen T. Colbert. And so, we say good night with a Fifty Hitler Salute.
-J.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------