Post by kozium on Oct 25, 2012 21:54:02 GMT -5
I made it to tonight's event! Just home, with the book just finished. I need to reread carefully before I dive into the discussions, but I'll give the report ASAP.
The bookstore was packed, far more crowded than I ever remember seeing it on my usual visits. The aisles were full of kids, parents, and young adults, all with new and old stacks of books. The atmosphere, in a word, was loud. Everyone was chattering excitedly about ASOUE and ATWQ, wondering just what would come next. It was exciting to be around! I stopped at the wonderful café to sample some brownie and cheesecake about an hour before the presentation time, and I think I saw Mr. Handler standing with the bookstore manager and looking over at us around then. I can't be sure, though.
Tonight was my first time being fortunate enough to meet Mr. Handler. I already sort of knew what to expect from reading your reports of previous tours, but nothing can really prepare a person for the real force of his personality. I think everyone's mouth muscles were strained from smiling or laughing too hard by the end of the night. Or was that just me? Seriously, I feel great.
This bookstore lacked an adequate number of chairs, so we were crammed together on the floor and sandwiched between...I believe it was the different types of cookbooks and 'noteworthy fiction (as opposed to non-noteworthy ficton, Mr. Handler would later ask). One of the bookstore employees was either a fan or an excellent actor from his reactions throughout the night, and he couldn't stop smiling as he delivered the spiel about how unfortunate we all were to be there tonight. The kids went wild.
We were instructed to clear one of the side aisles as the time of the presentation's start came and went. We were told that 'Lemony Snicket' was arriving soon, so naturally I assumed the people standing in that aisle were clearing it to clear the way for him.
A minute later, the herd of Snicket fans on the dirty green carpet seemed to spin around as one and stare at a spot over my left shoulder. I assumed this was some sort of funny trick like when people face away from the elevator doors to pressure other people in the elevator to stand backwards, so I resolutely looked forward, assuming that Mr. Handler would be arriving through the aisle that was just cleared. Instead, I found Mr. Handler's leg near my left shoulder, looking for a place to put his foot.
'....oh, I'm sorry,' I said, flush with embarrassment and scooting over in a hurry. As he passed, I heard someone behind me say that they would never wash their knee again. Starstruck, we were! I dug my beat-up notebook out of my bag and began to take notes, hoping that my scribbles would easily translate into a reconstructed report of the night that I could then transfer to this website.
You already know the general structure of his act from the previously posted videos, so I'll try to see which scribbles in my notebook I can reconstruct into reasonably accurate jokes. A few fragments:
On the different types of cookbooks we were sandwiched between, Mr. Handler said something like: 'You should all run. Run from the cookbooks, and from the international cookbooks because none of the other cookbooks are from a nation at all, and from the dietary cookbooks because none of the other cookbooks contain dietary things'.
On the general layout of the bookstore: Mr. Handler consistently referred to it as a synagogue, with special attention to the previously mentioned dirty green carpet.
On the accordion: a pair of friends were called up to demonstrate how it works, and the first of the poor girls was nearly squoze to death by the second girl standing behind her, in a method reminiscent of the Heimlich maneuver but not nearly as helpful as it. This, according to Mr. Handler, is the general principle of the accordion and a general principle of life: "if you squeeze anything hard enough, eventually it will make a noise". His new song was lovely, and I think it's in the video.
As more of a general comment, I found myself pitying the poor people who couldn't care less what a lemony snicket was, the ones who were just there to quietly shop for a book. Here there was an ("awkward but very handsome"---his words) man in a suit screaming in front of small children. Mr Handler can really belt out a scream when he wants to, especially when holding the terrifying biting bat that bit Mr. Snicket's armpit and jumping through a sea of children to shove it in our faces. And all the children were laughing. It must have looked like a terrible, terrible thing to anyone not in the know. The screams and accordion echoed throughout the store, disturbing the peace of those poor unfortunate souls.
I didn't bring any of the old books to the signing, just two copies of WCTBATH. One was for myself and the other was for a friend of mine who lives somewhere he doesn't really visit (and I don't think the book has been published in her country either). It wasn't a terribly long wait, and when I reached the top of the line he noticed my notebook and scribbles.
I explained they were for a report for you fine folk here at 667, and we joked a little about my first assignment as a newbie. He seemed a little disappointed that I didn't know of anyone else from here that was in attendance, but he did say that you're all very hard-working people and to "give my regards to your compatriots".
So there you have it, 667ers! Your regards from Mr. Handler tonight, freshly delivered. I won't spoil the inscriptions in our books in case my friend is reading, I'd like it to be a surprise. But I assure you that I laughed, and I hope she does too.
The bookstore was packed, far more crowded than I ever remember seeing it on my usual visits. The aisles were full of kids, parents, and young adults, all with new and old stacks of books. The atmosphere, in a word, was loud. Everyone was chattering excitedly about ASOUE and ATWQ, wondering just what would come next. It was exciting to be around! I stopped at the wonderful café to sample some brownie and cheesecake about an hour before the presentation time, and I think I saw Mr. Handler standing with the bookstore manager and looking over at us around then. I can't be sure, though.
Tonight was my first time being fortunate enough to meet Mr. Handler. I already sort of knew what to expect from reading your reports of previous tours, but nothing can really prepare a person for the real force of his personality. I think everyone's mouth muscles were strained from smiling or laughing too hard by the end of the night. Or was that just me? Seriously, I feel great.
This bookstore lacked an adequate number of chairs, so we were crammed together on the floor and sandwiched between...I believe it was the different types of cookbooks and 'noteworthy fiction (as opposed to non-noteworthy ficton, Mr. Handler would later ask). One of the bookstore employees was either a fan or an excellent actor from his reactions throughout the night, and he couldn't stop smiling as he delivered the spiel about how unfortunate we all were to be there tonight. The kids went wild.
We were instructed to clear one of the side aisles as the time of the presentation's start came and went. We were told that 'Lemony Snicket' was arriving soon, so naturally I assumed the people standing in that aisle were clearing it to clear the way for him.
A minute later, the herd of Snicket fans on the dirty green carpet seemed to spin around as one and stare at a spot over my left shoulder. I assumed this was some sort of funny trick like when people face away from the elevator doors to pressure other people in the elevator to stand backwards, so I resolutely looked forward, assuming that Mr. Handler would be arriving through the aisle that was just cleared. Instead, I found Mr. Handler's leg near my left shoulder, looking for a place to put his foot.
'....oh, I'm sorry,' I said, flush with embarrassment and scooting over in a hurry. As he passed, I heard someone behind me say that they would never wash their knee again. Starstruck, we were! I dug my beat-up notebook out of my bag and began to take notes, hoping that my scribbles would easily translate into a reconstructed report of the night that I could then transfer to this website.
You already know the general structure of his act from the previously posted videos, so I'll try to see which scribbles in my notebook I can reconstruct into reasonably accurate jokes. A few fragments:
On the different types of cookbooks we were sandwiched between, Mr. Handler said something like: 'You should all run. Run from the cookbooks, and from the international cookbooks because none of the other cookbooks are from a nation at all, and from the dietary cookbooks because none of the other cookbooks contain dietary things'.
On the general layout of the bookstore: Mr. Handler consistently referred to it as a synagogue, with special attention to the previously mentioned dirty green carpet.
On the accordion: a pair of friends were called up to demonstrate how it works, and the first of the poor girls was nearly squoze to death by the second girl standing behind her, in a method reminiscent of the Heimlich maneuver but not nearly as helpful as it. This, according to Mr. Handler, is the general principle of the accordion and a general principle of life: "if you squeeze anything hard enough, eventually it will make a noise". His new song was lovely, and I think it's in the video.
As more of a general comment, I found myself pitying the poor people who couldn't care less what a lemony snicket was, the ones who were just there to quietly shop for a book. Here there was an ("awkward but very handsome"---his words) man in a suit screaming in front of small children. Mr Handler can really belt out a scream when he wants to, especially when holding the terrifying biting bat that bit Mr. Snicket's armpit and jumping through a sea of children to shove it in our faces. And all the children were laughing. It must have looked like a terrible, terrible thing to anyone not in the know. The screams and accordion echoed throughout the store, disturbing the peace of those poor unfortunate souls.
I didn't bring any of the old books to the signing, just two copies of WCTBATH. One was for myself and the other was for a friend of mine who lives somewhere he doesn't really visit (and I don't think the book has been published in her country either). It wasn't a terribly long wait, and when I reached the top of the line he noticed my notebook and scribbles.
I explained they were for a report for you fine folk here at 667, and we joked a little about my first assignment as a newbie. He seemed a little disappointed that I didn't know of anyone else from here that was in attendance, but he did say that you're all very hard-working people and to "give my regards to your compatriots".
So there you have it, 667ers! Your regards from Mr. Handler tonight, freshly delivered. I won't spoil the inscriptions in our books in case my friend is reading, I'd like it to be a surprise. But I assure you that I laughed, and I hope she does too.