Chapter Seven
When the four Baudelaires and Cindry Fulfillment got inside the elevator, bound to the first floor of the casino, from where they could go to the Pool Yard, or in italian,
Cortile dei Piscini, they took a few moments to talk between themselves.
'We have only two goals here. We must recover the sugarbowl, wherever it may be, and we must reunite with Lars and go to the harbor, in Little Venice, from where we can ride the
Elizabethan Whistle to the Hazy Harbor. From there we can go to the City.' said Klaus. 'Yes, but we have to wait for a truly
excellent opportunity to do so. Until then, we have to play their game.' Violet said, using an expression which here meant 'pretend that yes, they had decided crime was
in and that they were now fire starters as opposed to volunteers'. After Violet explained their conversation with Esmé Squalor earlier in Klaus' room, Sunny and Beatrice agreed that pretending to be
with Esmé and her cohorts was the best course of action. They were on an island, an island filled with villains and their henchmen. They wouldn't stand much of a chance against the villains, not unless they pretended to be villains themselves.
'This is not the first time we have to disguise ourselves. Our earlier disguises didn't work, as they all knew we were here beforehand. But as opposed to our outer appearance, we have to disguise
who we are to convince them.' Violet said. Strangely, the elevator didn't have a concierge inside it, so the Baudelaires could talk privately without the fear of being overheard by a minion of Esmé and Carlo's.
'Cindry, you've been here the longest. What kind of relationship does Carlo have with Esmé anyways? Does he know what she did to Jerome? Does he know she might just do about the same thing to
him?' Klaus asked. He still remembered how Esmé left Jerome Squalor, her former husband, for Count Olaf, the man who so terrified their lives, and that was now dead and gone.
'Well, he calls her his Queen, or in italian,
Regina, and treats her like a queen. As far as I could tell, he is just about as much obsessed with what is
in and whatnot. She doesn't give him the best treatment, but I have no idea who this Jerome person is, and what she did to him.' Cindry said, and Klaus quickly summed up everything about Esmé and Jerome's relationship to her. 'Oh, that is terrible for Jerome. I hope he is alive out there, somewhere.' Cindry was kind enough to add. Amongst the many regrets of the Baudelaires was the regret of possibly causing Jerome Squalor's death as they set fire to Hotel Denouement.
'Enough about Esmé. I'm too sick of her to keep talking about her.' Said Violet, interrupting Klaus just as he was about to end his tale to Cindry, and she pushed a button to order the elevator to go down. 'Let's just go and get this over with.'
Violet, Klaus, Sunny, Beatrice and Cindry walked out of the elevator, letting a group of gamblers go in their place. The casino lobby was filled with gamblers, some with large smiles across their faces, and others who looked as though they were doomed, forever. If the later had known that not just anyone can win at Casanova Casino, they probably would be alright. But as every rule has it's exception, the Baudelaires hoped they could win, just this one time, and escape Luck Island in the
Elizabethan Whistle, now docked at the harbor down at Little Venice, with Lars and Cindry, and break away from the never ending series of unfortunate events they had been caught in since that fateful day when the black letter arrived.
Exiting through an adjacent corridor separated from the rest of the slots parlor by a series of archs and columns, the Baudelaires soon found themselves in the outside area of the Casino, more precisely, the
Cortile dei Piscini, or in english, Pool Courtyard.
'This it. The Pool Courtyard, or in italian, the
Cortile dei Piscini. Do you see Esmé and the others anywhere?' Klaus was the first to speak, but he received no answer. Because the courtyard was full of people, all in swimsuits, except for the waiters and waitresses - who someone deemed appropriate that they should wear rabbit-inspired costumes.
'Could this place get any weirder, seriously?' Violet asked, sarcastically. She was tired of the Casino already, and took a mental note not to ever visit another casino for as long as she lived. 'When you have Esmé Squalor taking over a place, it's bound to get weird.' Klaus added. He still remembered each and every of Esmé's insane outfits, - some more than others, I'm afraid, after all, Klaus
was a teenager -, and if not for her villainous ways, Esmé was unforgettable for her fashion.
'That way.' Cindry suddenly said, as she started walking towards a higher area with a lot less people. It was a yard surrounded by a hedge maze with heart shaped rose bushes, with beautiful white roses blossoming all over them. The marble floors were a black and white, familiar chess pattern, as with most areas of the casino. Inside the surrounded area, a group of villains conversed over tea.
'Those fool gardeners! I specifically instructed each and every one of them! White roses are
OUT!Red roses are
in!' Esmé complained, with her trademark pout, while letting her hand rest between those of Carlo Casanova, her boyfriend. 'Scusi, bella! I'll have them all fired, for failing you, my dear! My Queen,
ma Regina!' Carlo looked at Esmé as if she was an object, a trophy, but the most beautiful trophy in the world. As the dresscode of the party was swimsuit, Carlo was shirtless, and probably had his swimsuit on, but the Baudelaires couldn't see as he was sitting next to Esmé at the table.
'You can always paint the roses red, Esmé.' Said Caterina, who wore a gorgeous white bikini with white heart patterns, and still had her dark red lipstick and nail polish on. On the bikini, there was an embroidery shaped like a Q with a white heart beneath it. 'No reason to
fire all the gardeners! That's sillyness!' Caterina finished with a giggle.
'Any one wants more tea?' a woman's voice sounded, behind the Baudelaires. The voice was strangely familar, but the Baudelaires could not place it, and as they turned around, they saw that they had never seen the woman before, and neither had they seen the woman besides that woman, or at least, that's what they thought. One of them wore a tall top hat, and had a big H with a large heart embroidered on her jacket. The woman besides her must have been a waitress, because she had a rabbit inspired costume on, complete with ears - red, as for the waitresses, black for waiters - and a red corset and leotard with panty-hos and red shoes. They both were very beautiful, and there was just something about them that struck the Baudelaires as very familiar. But before they could think anymore on the subject, Esmé Squalor called their attention.
'Oh, Baudelaires! And also Cindry!' Esmé raised from her chair, with another of her devilish smiles on her face. 'Oh, but none of you are in the current dresscode of our pool party! You must change. Bonnie and Hattie will take you, won't they, Carlo?' said Esmé, looking at Carlo and extending her arm so that he could grab it and started kissing it.
'Ma, claro! My Queen, ma Regina! Anything for you!' said Carlo between kisses on Esmé's arm. The Baudelaires felt like vomiting, and so did Cindry, but the two women, Bonnie - in the rabbit waitress suit - and Hattie - in the bartender jacket - made the Baudelaires and Cindry follow them to five changing booths near one of the many heart-shaped pools, like those you would find at the beach, or by the pool, in a more normal casino.
'Here are your swimsuits' said Bonnie, handing each Baudelaire - and Cindry - their appointed swimsuits and accessories as picked out for them by Esmé Squalor, in five red boxes with black hearts on them. 'You can dress in each of the changing booths. When you are finished, please, come out.' said Hattie, gently pointing the changing booths.
Violet, Klaus, Sunny, Beatrice and Cindry each entered their own corresponding changing booth, and each came out minutes later, looking completely different. Violet wore a purple and red bikini with a heart pattern, and had a red hair ribbon on, different than her normal black ribbon. Sunny and Beatrice wore similar infant sized bathing suits, with reversed colors - black and red - and Klaus, poor Klaus. He was given nothing but swimsuit shorts, black, with red hearts. It was hard telling with was more red, if it was the hearts on Klaus' speedo - a word which here means a piece of swimsuit that many men and young men are not very comfortable to wear in public - or his face, out of the embarrassement he got out of it. But if his face was red already, it soon became redder, when Klaus saw Cindry walk out of her changing booth, wearing a white bikini similar to that of Caterina's, and her hair tied in a ponytail with a red scarf with a heart motif. Klaus had never stopped to truly grasp Cindry's
physical beauty - because, quite frankly, he hadn't had time or opportunity to do so - but now, he did.
'Cindry...You're...' Klaus was so amazed, and embarrassed at the same time he forgot his words. Cindry however, did not look very pleased. 'My aunt Victoria would not approve of me dressed like this.' She said, with a disgruntled look on her face. 'Neither would my uncle Ferdinand or my dad. Or my mom.'
'Oh, you're all ready. Great. Let's return to the table of the Royals.' said Bonnie.
As Bonnie and Hattie took the Baudelaires and Cindry to the table, they soon noticed the other Casanovas had joined Esmé, Carlo and Caterina. Carlotta, Felix and Don Casanova were sitting at the table with them, and I'm said to say, they too obbeyed the dresscode, a sentence which here means 'wore swimsuits that were more revealing than what the Baudelaires were accostumed to'. Carlotta, for an instance, wore a one-piece red swimsuit with an enourmous heart on front, Felix's could not be seen as he was sitting, and Don Casnova was shirtless, but had his trademark coat on, as an exception to the rule of the dresscode. Esmé couldn't bend all the Casanovas, so it seemed.
'Oh, there they are.' Said Carlotta, who was the first to notice the Baudelaires and Cindry approaching with Bonnie and Hattie. 'They all look beautiful. But not as much as me, of course.' said Carlotta, and again, all Casanovas - but Esmé - clapped their hands in a agreement. 'Sit with us, young folks. I do apreciate young ones who partake in a life of crime.' Said Don Casanova, who looked as much as a playing card King as he did the night before. Felix, merely stared at Violet, and when she noticed his stare, she blushed and looked the other way. Violet could not see how that
handsome and
young man had fooled them to believe he was an old man called Foreman Ferguson, or a snobish middle-aged butler, or a worn-out, rugged sea captain named Stubb. His reputation and alias
Il Camaleonte, italian for 'The Chameleon' made Violet guess that there was so much more beneath the beautiful surface her eyes could now see, and the thought made her shrudder.
'I trust you all liked your swimsuits. They come from the
House of In, I had them brought just for you all.' said Esmé, with a large smile, her two hands supporting her head.
'We do, Esmé.' Klaus said, feeling sick to his stomach. The thought of sitting at the same table with that woman, and being
civilized was more than he could bear.
'See, let's get down to business. Tell them what you want, Carlo.' Esmé said, and Carlo took some time to kiss her arms and shoulder before he said anything. 'See, Baudelaires. We have a problem at this Casino.' And then he started kissing Esmé again. The Baudelaires' breakfasts were climbing up their throats, so Violet interrupted him. 'Mr. Casanova, if we're going to talk about business, can you please keep your hands of your...of Esmé, please?' Violet said, feeling both embarrassed and sick. Esmé smiled and said 'Jealous much, V? I understand the only boy that ever liked you died at sea.'
'He didn't die, Esmé.' Violet said, almost as if she knew it to be truth, which, at this point in my investigations, I can say that is true. 'So, Mr. Casanova, what exactly is the problem at the casino?'
'It's simple. People keep winning on the roulettes. That's a big problem when you have a fortune to take care of.' Carlo said. The Baudelaires could not see, but Esmé's eyes shone upon the mention of a
fortune. 'We don't want to keep handing out money as often. We heard of your skill as an inventor, Violet. We want you to invent an impossible to win roulette for us.'
'A what?' Was Violet's first incredule reaction. She had expected anything, but to have to
invent something to help out a family of italian mobsters. 'Are you going deaf?' Esmé asked. 'We want you to invent an impossible to win roulette, one where every gambler will lose, always.' Carlo said.
'Can it be done?' Don Casanova asked. Everyone at the table was looking at Violet, and this made her feel the most uncomfortable she had been since her arrival at that Casino. 'Violet can invent anything, can't you, Violet?' Cindry said, her had reaching for Violet's under the table. Violet understood the message immediately. 'Yes. I can do it, just with a few simple materials.'
'That's great!' Carlo exclamated, too enthusiastically for the Baudelaires' taste. Every Casanova at the table smiled, thinking of the money they would win this way. 'That way, when Esmé and I marry, we'll be even richer, and we'll get richer and richer.' Carlo added. Esmé smiled, but it was an almost uncomfortable smile, compared to her other smiles. Not failing to notice this, Violet felt brave enough to look at Esmé and ask her a crucial question.
'What about Jerome, Esmé? Have you filed for divorce? You know you can't marry more than once at a time.'
Esmé glanced furiously at Violet for a second, and then she decided to use her acting skills to get out of a jam, an expression which here means 'cover up something she had not told her current boyfriend yet' 'Jerome? Jerome
who? I don't know who this Jerome is, but I don't have a clue what do you mean with divorce. I've never been married before, I still have my maiden name and all.'
'Squalor isn't her maiden name.' Klaus whispered to Violet, but she already knew it. Esmé wouldn't have kept her lost husband's name for sentimental reasons. There was
another reason for it, the Baudelaires knew. 'Stop talking sillyness, Violet. Just say that you can do it, and invent the damn roulette.' Esmé added.
'I'll need a blender, a metallic bar, and some electric wires. It would be great if there were some magnets as well.' Said Violet, while tying her hair up with the red ribbon.
'Big man, take Violet and the others to the inside of the casino where Violet can invent the roulette.' Said Carlo Casanova to the enormous giant who was Don Casanova's bodyguard. But the man wasn't there. 'Wait, where
is he?' Carlo asked, and everyone looked embarrassed. 'He is sitting over there, on that wall.' Caterina pointed across the courtyard, to a tall, thin wall where the enourmous man was sitting.
'That fool! I've told him, I'm fed up with sending casino workers to pick him up when he falls from that wall!' Don Casanova shouted angrily. The wall looked very thin at the top, and they only wondered how he got up there in the first place, being so fat.
'There. He fell again!' Carlotta said, and it was true. The enourmous man sitting on the wall fell to the other side of the wall, and the Baudelaires caught a glimpse of his tall, thin legs vanishing behind the wall. 'Why does he like to sit there anyways?' Caterina asked.
'He says it's the best place to watch over the
Cortile dei Piscini, my dear daughter.' Don Casanova said to Caterina. Pressing a button on the intercom device on the table the Baudelaires could not see because of all the teapots and other dinnerwares, Don Casanova called out his henchmen to go help the fat man. 'Tonny, Vinny, go help my Umberto, he's fallen from the wall again.' They could hear a disgruntled protest from the intercom device. 'Oh, stop whining, the both of you.'
'Pathetic.' Carlotta said, crossing her fat arms. 'Felix, you take the Baudelaires inside to where Violet can invent the new impossible roulette.' Don Casanova said to the blonde man sitting besides him. Felix stood up, and his swimsuit shorts could now be seen. 'This way, Baudelaires.' he said to the Baudelaires. Violet, Klaus, Sunny and Beatrice stood up and followed Felix. 'Come, Cindry.' Klaus said, but before Cindry could stand up and follow him, Esmé stopped her. 'No, she's staying here. We don't want you having any ideas, middle Baudelaire.'
Klaus wanted to protest, but Violet laid her hand on his shoulder, as if telling him to stay quiet. If they wanted to convince Esmé and the others, they would have to go all the way, an expression which here means 'to keep pretending that they had decided that crime was
in', so that they could gain Esmé's trust and recover the sugarbowl.