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Post by B. on Apr 9, 2022 2:15:17 GMT -5
Hey everyone! Welcome to the official 2022 Darkies thread! The awards are now running from now til whenever people get done posting results on Sunday. If you're presenting a speech, Resemblance should've been in touch with you with the final results of your award. Please feel free to present any time between now and Sunday evening (whenever that is in your timezone). If you're making a banner, you should be able to find details here: asoue.proboards.com/thread/37312/bannersI think that's everything for now. Anything else, send me a PM or direct message on whatever social platform you have me on, or post here. Ciao for now, B.
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Post by B. on Apr 9, 2022 2:24:18 GMT -5
Okay I'm back. I want to kick off the awards by presenting Best New Member. We already have MoTM, which often honours and recognises new members who become very active within joining. I remember I won it for October 2011 when I'd first joined and bumped a bunch of threads that hadn't been posted in all month with Snicket comments or whatever. I think of this award as an extension of that, for the entire year. It goes without saying, but we really need new members! It's kind of easy to see how 667 can be a bit clique-like. It's old and clunky, especially for a forum. The fact that some members active here now weren't even born when we started in 2002 is nuts. Anyway, the nominations for best new member are as follows: HAL 10,000Resemblance CupidWe have slightly few nominations this year, but there's no denying that each of them have made really good contributions to the forum within the past year, and hopefully will be active here for many years to come. However, there can only be one winner. ... Resemblance! Okay so there really aren't any surprises here. I truly still can't believe Semblance has only been here since July, since it seems like he's been ever-present and active here forever. Semblance, you truly embody the collaborative spirit of 667, and are probably our forum's best new member easily within the last 5 years. We're extremely lucky to have you, and hope you'll never leave. TTFN Bee the panopticountolaf will get to you with a banner
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Post by Violent BUN Fortuna on Apr 9, 2022 2:27:31 GMT -5
Congrats, Semby! That was completely unsurprising, and very well deserved.
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Post by Isadora Is a Door on Apr 9, 2022 2:40:35 GMT -5
Can we tell Bee off for double-posting?
I will be posting my random boring statistics through the ceremony, and I will be updating the archive award post with each award(ing) that happens. So if you don't like boring stuff, then please look away now.
Congrats to the teenybopper. You are the best, winning the new member award with a record-equalling 13 votes.
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Post by R. on Apr 9, 2022 3:17:19 GMT -5
Congratulations!!! You certainly deserve it
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Post by Isadora Is a Door on Apr 9, 2022 5:05:36 GMT -5
No jokes, I'm now going to present the award for 'Most Amusing', or as i prefer to call it 'Funniest Member' (another award Zortegus should win).
Websters dictionary defines 'Amusing' as 'causing laughter and providing entertainment'. Wether or not the laughter is intedned, and wehter or not the entertainment is sometimes second or, in my case, third rate, amusing things have a funny habit of happening in this place. Mostly because we're all old enough to know better, and yet we don't.
Despite being very amusing, Bear, Travedy, and Terry all recieved no votes. I am sure that bear in particular will have something 'funny' to say about that.
Bee and Roxy both got one vote each, despite the fact they both make me laugh all the time. huh.
GlitteryMisery got 2 votes, despite the fact that I spend 20% of my time on 667 laughing at her member of the month banner.
Zortegus and Semblance fot 3 votes each, despite the fact that neither of them seem able to produce an issue of the 667er between them. come on guys, it aint that hard.
And now I find myself in the laughable position of both presenting and accepting an award, as I find myself in first place, along twiggy. Twiggy is much more fun than me, so I don't know what happened there. Congratulations to her, and cong-rats (©Terry Craig) to myself as well. I don;t think i've been any funnier in the last year, although I suppose I may be amusing like an old arcade from the 70s.
Anyone for dodgems?
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Post by Optimism is my Phil-osophy on Apr 9, 2022 5:38:25 GMT -5
Congratulations to both!! About your award, Mister M, I have to say that you have something difficult to achieve on a forum: "timing", which is essential to the joke's effect.
Twiggy is naturally fun.
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Post by Isadora Is a Door on Apr 9, 2022 6:27:13 GMT -5
Hurry up an award something else, i'm getting impatient here!
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Post by twigz on Apr 9, 2022 6:33:17 GMT -5
hurry up deez nuts
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Post by Isadora Is a Door on Apr 9, 2022 7:29:22 GMT -5
Congrats Gothic. Your movie posts are always really interesting. This win makes gothicarchiesfan only the second person to win Best Volunterr three times, and puts him in the top three of total votes recieved for this award, along with Hermes and Dante. This year is also the first time that Dante has not been nominated for the award
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Post by twigz on Apr 9, 2022 7:45:11 GMT -5
ibb.co/LCJy5Hz here is your banner!!! thank you for your dedication <3
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Post by HAL 10,000 on Apr 9, 2022 8:21:33 GMT -5
The funniest thing Twiggy's ever said(atleast since I've been a member)was "Tits out for Snicket."
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Post by the panopticountolaf on Apr 9, 2022 8:37:54 GMT -5
And now, from last year's Dante Musical Memorial Awards, and that text adventure thingy, please welcome urban-letter-opener!YOU GUYS! It's time to hand out the BEST PAIRING AWARD, given to the couple (of chumps!! LOL) who really wowed all of us this past year with their undying love for one another, their entertaining rivalry, or their gestation, depending on who you're thinking about at the moment. NOW LISTEN UP! With the assistance of 667's Favorite Stalker (whose name rhymes with Semblance) I have dug up some of the HOTTEST GOSSIP 667 has seen since... uh... The HOTTEST GOSSIP 667 has EVER seen!!!!! Let's magee the pot (Victorian English for spill the tea) as I announce the final results... Terry Craig and Zortegus — I heard that these two are getting their own REALITY TELEVISION SERIES on the BRAVO TELEVISION NETWORK! Look out, Kardashians!! Also, Zortegus plans to slap Chris Rock ACROSS THE FACE at the next Oscars — all in the name of his darling TERRY CRAIG! They're slaying so hard they don't even need this award. Which is a GOOD THING because they got ZERO VOTES! Roxy and GlitteryMisery — These two, according to my SUPER SECRET SOURCE (hi Semby!) have been WORKING IN A FLOWER SHOP TOGETHER! Glittery is tending to a MYSTERIOUS PLANT that feeds on BLOOD, and she really wishes that Roxy would stop seeing that ABUSIVE DENTIST! I've got a bad feeling about where this is going... so did everyone else, I guess, because they got ZERO VOTES! Zortegus and Cupid — Um. If my suspicions are correct, whoever nominated these two is really into... um, stuff. Even the NASTY MOFO who nominated THE SAME PERSON must have had a CHANGE OF HEART, because this pairing got ZERO VOTES! (In other news, it is one of the most popular tags on Archive of Our Own right now.) Mister M and Zortegus — These two haven't been speaking to each other since the SETTLEMENT. Poor guys. I'm super glad for M, though; he deserved custody of THAT DARLING SHEEP MILLY wayyyyyy more than Z did. Don't tell anyone, but I think that M is ANGLING TO GET A PART IN TERRY CRAIG AND ZORTEGUS'S BRAVO SERIES!!! The whole affair was so unsavory that everyone COLLECTIVELY AND WORDLESSLY decided to give this pairing ZERO VOTES! Tragedy and Bee — Bee is currently writing TRAGEDY'S AUTOBIOGRAPHY, if I've heard correctly. She's written over NINE HUNDRED PAGES — and they're only a third of the way through!! What Tragedy isn't telling Bee about are the PASSPORTS that need to be hidden every 200 pages, or the family that's been hiding in his ROOT CELLAR since 2009. As many OF our esteemed members are already involved in ILLEGAL ACTIVITIES (hey Semblance!!) they probably don't want to DIRTY THEIR HANDS by voting for this pairing. That's right, they got ZERO VOTES! Bear and yosoy — Remember that "Invitation to the New Age" thread?? Turns out it was a CRYPTO THING. Bear, our RESIDENT CRYPTOCURRENCY EXPERT, recognized the signs immediately and is now INCREDIBLY WEALTHY thanks to YOSOYCOIN!! Bear's next move is to PRODUCE NFTS of HIS CLASSIC WORKS OF LITERATURE! "Lemony Snicket's Valentine Surprise" will have a STARTING PRICE of 49812579312598132758923175912379513957157 Yosoycoins. Unfortunately, this pairing got ZERO VOTES because NFTS STINKY! Jean Lucio and Violent Bun Fortuna Tragedy and Twiggy Sherry Ann Semblance and Bee Tragedy and Hermes Zortegus and Semblance — A little Semblance told me that everyone in these pairings has JOINED A CULT! They've got their own FORUMS at 776 Light Avenue, and their LEADER is NONE OTHER THAN SHERRY ANN'S AS-OF-YET UNBORN CHILD!!!!! They spend their days talking about NUDITY and POP-TARTS, and they're planning to ascend to the MOTHERSHIP as soon as this speech is OVER! Because these folks are all GRADE A NARCISSISTS, they all voted for their own pairing... which means that they each got ONE VOTE. I for one welcome our MINI SHERRY ANN OVERLORDS! Roxy and Semblance — These two enjoyed "Dinner at Hungry's" so much that they've started MEETING in YELLOWSTONE NATIONAL PARK to LARP. Footage taken by an UNSUSPECTING HIKER shows Roxy throwing her arms into the air and shouting "LIGHTNING!" while Semblance IS FLAPPING HIS ARMS like some kind of bird. The duo has been banned from Yellowstone for disturbing the BEARS. They're planning on HAUNTING the GRAND CANYON next. For being so wholesome, these two received THREE VOTES! Mister M and Anka — You guys... Semblance tried his best, but he couldn't dig up anything on these guys. They're just so... normal!! Uh, what to say, what to say... They got married? That's pretty neat? Anyways. Through some freak accident the least outrageous pairing has won Best Pairing this year! All of Semblance's hard work has been wasted!!!!! Oh well. I give up my post as editor of the 667 Murmurer! M, Anka — have this banner. You've earned it Conga rats!
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Post by Optimism is my Phil-osophy on Apr 9, 2022 9:55:52 GMT -5
Congratulations to the Anka couple! You are beautiful, you are smart and you love each other! (And I didn't vote for myself. These papers today are full of lies! After all, Sheryann's baby asked us to vote for Mister M and Anka.)
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Post by Isadora Is a Door on Apr 9, 2022 10:16:57 GMT -5
Thanks very much for the win, and for the banner. This marks the first time a pairing has one twice. A lot has happened in 8 years...
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